Written By Gunther
Aug. 9, 2020, 4:09 p.m.(10/22/1013 AR)
Sally,
Sometimes when I wake up to this day I roll over and I reach out my mitts to get a handful of you and I come up empty. Those mornings are the hardest to bring myself up from the depths and harder still to reason why I should bother with the day. You would think with the years that have gone by since you caught ill and left me I would be able to wake up and not shed the tears. It isn't that way. Every time my slumbering hands grasp in their unconscious need of world that /should be/ and instead clench the emptiness /that is/ my heart shatters. I miss you so, Sally-girl -- now more then ever.
I cry in my squire's bunk with my knees drawn to my chest tightly; knuckles white as I clench at myself and grip in desperation to feel your warmth again. It feels like my heart is going to burst and like some horse is standing on my chest and I cannot breathe. And oh how I pray for the release that brings me to you again. I am not as useful as I once was. Some days my own name escapes me and I can't remember things as they were. The days where I stutter in my head to remember your love are the ones that remind me of how fragile and lost I am without you.
I know you would be proud of me. I know you would mutter and express your displeasure that I give all my coin and life to others in need while taking so very little myself. I would be lying if it wasn't because I feel like I don't deserve anything because I do feel that way. The Gods gave me you and by their grace I found the light that pushes me forward into the darkness. But not alone. I have the Knights of Solace with me and for them I give my last days in your honor.
I love you Sally. I love you as sure as the sun will kiss the skin of life tomorrow and refresh it after the darkness has come and gone. I love you as an arrow loves the clouds. I love you as a the cricket loves his melody. You were the song that inspired my existence and without you here -- its echo keeps me going.
I ache to be with you again. I hope to prove myself through my life and dedication to the Gods to earn even just a moment with you. Just a moment. I just want to touch you one last time. Every day I remember a little less. Every day my cough gets a little longer and my bones ache just a little more. And every day I force myself up and to give all of me to the life that never had no Sally.
I love you my baby girl and I long to be with you when the Gods find that my penance for the immeasurable pleasure of your grace is served.
Yours in this life and the next turn of the wheel,
Gunther
Sometimes when I wake up to this day I roll over and I reach out my mitts to get a handful of you and I come up empty. Those mornings are the hardest to bring myself up from the depths and harder still to reason why I should bother with the day. You would think with the years that have gone by since you caught ill and left me I would be able to wake up and not shed the tears. It isn't that way. Every time my slumbering hands grasp in their unconscious need of world that /should be/ and instead clench the emptiness /that is/ my heart shatters. I miss you so, Sally-girl -- now more then ever.
I cry in my squire's bunk with my knees drawn to my chest tightly; knuckles white as I clench at myself and grip in desperation to feel your warmth again. It feels like my heart is going to burst and like some horse is standing on my chest and I cannot breathe. And oh how I pray for the release that brings me to you again. I am not as useful as I once was. Some days my own name escapes me and I can't remember things as they were. The days where I stutter in my head to remember your love are the ones that remind me of how fragile and lost I am without you.
I know you would be proud of me. I know you would mutter and express your displeasure that I give all my coin and life to others in need while taking so very little myself. I would be lying if it wasn't because I feel like I don't deserve anything because I do feel that way. The Gods gave me you and by their grace I found the light that pushes me forward into the darkness. But not alone. I have the Knights of Solace with me and for them I give my last days in your honor.
I love you Sally. I love you as sure as the sun will kiss the skin of life tomorrow and refresh it after the darkness has come and gone. I love you as an arrow loves the clouds. I love you as a the cricket loves his melody. You were the song that inspired my existence and without you here -- its echo keeps me going.
I ache to be with you again. I hope to prove myself through my life and dedication to the Gods to earn even just a moment with you. Just a moment. I just want to touch you one last time. Every day I remember a little less. Every day my cough gets a little longer and my bones ache just a little more. And every day I force myself up and to give all of me to the life that never had no Sally.
I love you my baby girl and I long to be with you when the Gods find that my penance for the immeasurable pleasure of your grace is served.
Yours in this life and the next turn of the wheel,
Gunther
Written By Tyrus
Aug. 9, 2020, 3:06 p.m.(10/22/1013 AR)
Relationship Note on Preston
You understand what I asked and your answers show depth of commitment and understanding, and make me hope for a brighter Dream yet.
Written By Piccola
Aug. 9, 2020, 2:56 p.m.(10/22/1013 AR)
A wise man once taught me all I needed to know of the business of war:
Numerous and plentiful are the opportunities for mortals to convince themselves of their own righteousness. The business of war begins begins with dividing the world into the good and the bad; it ends with using any means necessary to take the villains out. And so long as we seek to resolve disputes at the point of the spear, this business will always be abundant and profitable.
Thus, what matters is whether war is necessary; we otherwise only need imagine why this is so.
Numerous and plentiful are the opportunities for mortals to convince themselves of their own righteousness. The business of war begins begins with dividing the world into the good and the bad; it ends with using any means necessary to take the villains out. And so long as we seek to resolve disputes at the point of the spear, this business will always be abundant and profitable.
Thus, what matters is whether war is necessary; we otherwise only need imagine why this is so.
Written By Hamish
Aug. 9, 2020, 10:50 a.m.(10/21/1013 AR)
Relationship Note on Tanith
Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
No pain, no gain.
Who dares wins.
Sometimes the juice is worth the squeeze.
I could keep going. I came up with all of these. I am very wise.
No pain, no gain.
Who dares wins.
Sometimes the juice is worth the squeeze.
I could keep going. I came up with all of these. I am very wise.
Written By Preston
Aug. 9, 2020, 8:48 a.m.(10/21/1013 AR)
Relationship Note on Edain
You never seemed wholly comfortable in the role you had to play, just as I was then growing accustomed to my own. I would like to think we each grew into the duties placed upon us, became the men of the hour that were required. If duty calls you now to other places to do other things, then I will wish you that same success - and to your successors - as I wished you before. I look forward to our next discussion over tea, it seem you will have many stories to tell.
Written By Preston
Aug. 9, 2020, 8:40 a.m.(10/21/1013 AR)
Relationship Note on Tyrus
As I understand, you ask if people are willing to follow through with their call or if it is mere words? I must admit, I never picked up this call - it does not sit easy on my lips. It makes things seem....personal. Yet fighting slavery is a cause the Templars have put themselves to with greater enthusiasm in recent months, it is a cause we bear even if I might frame it different to Prima Shard.
You ask if, knowing that those we kill have children, that they may see the killing of those slavers, if knowing that these things will have repurcussions, would we stay our hand? The answer is simple for a Templar. We know the cause is righteous, that slavery goes against the commands of the Gods. We will do what we can to minimise impact, and in the battle always protect the innocent, and yet. No. While the pace of holy progress can perhaps alter, it cannot be stopped.
You ask if, knowing that those we kill have children, that they may see the killing of those slavers, if knowing that these things will have repurcussions, would we stay our hand? The answer is simple for a Templar. We know the cause is righteous, that slavery goes against the commands of the Gods. We will do what we can to minimise impact, and in the battle always protect the innocent, and yet. No. While the pace of holy progress can perhaps alter, it cannot be stopped.
Written By Aconite
Aug. 9, 2020, 3:45 a.m.(10/21/1013 AR)
My only regret is that I didn't make that last jump. I had no expectations of winning for a race, like life, requires not just the will but the skill to be able to overcome every obstacle. Some people have been practicing these things for years and I must remind myself that someday I will have those skills as well. But I mustn't be afraid of the challenge and I must be patient that I will someday have the ability to overcome... Even those tall sudden ones. A lesson, perhaps, to let go and ride with them rather than hold tight and hope for the best. We shall see what comes of this lesson. I have otherwise been busy, the traders from Tor are bringing in the heavier silks and brocade as the weather turns colder and I've had to change my focus some as goods become less available through the colder months. Thankfully there's still plenty to do so much that I have little interest to report.
Also, there was that little tet-a-tet with the investigator, imagine being so cynical that you see monstrosity in decorum. It's my hope that if we cross paths again I can show him the difference between grace and horror.
Also, there was that little tet-a-tet with the investigator, imagine being so cynical that you see monstrosity in decorum. It's my hope that if we cross paths again I can show him the difference between grace and horror.
Written By Derovai
Aug. 9, 2020, 1:01 a.m.(10/21/1013 AR)
Back again. It's uncanny that every time I return to Arx, some new disaster seems to have sprung up in my absence, and often more than one. That isn't some sort of suggestion that the two are linked, of course, merely an observation of just how many disasters happen to occur in this city, considering how frequently work takes me away.
Written By Ysabel
Aug. 9, 2020, 12:14 a.m.(10/21/1013 AR)
I caught myself thinking of him the other day. After I was done tending to the matters of the Barony that I needed to, and found myself with some time to sit in the courtyard, beneath all the wisteria.
Milk.
He drink milk like a Lycene drinks wine.
One might have to invest in a fleet of cows. Are they called a fleet? No, herd. Herd of cows. I should learn how to care for cows. He will want milk. Or maybe he can just learn to drink wine. Wine and milk. I wonder if they go together.
Milk.
He drink milk like a Lycene drinks wine.
One might have to invest in a fleet of cows. Are they called a fleet? No, herd. Herd of cows. I should learn how to care for cows. He will want milk. Or maybe he can just learn to drink wine. Wine and milk. I wonder if they go together.
Written By Piccola
Aug. 9, 2020, 12:10 a.m.(10/21/1013 AR)
Those who expect to reap the blessings of freedom must undergo the fatigues of supporting it.
These are the times that try our souls. The summer soldier will shrink from the service of their calling, but she who stands in the path of doom deserves the love and thanks of all. Yet let not that praise overwhelm or create in such person an idol to be propped up as a paragon, for times change, as all things do, and people find novel ways to destroy one another or re-discover old brutalities to inflict upon one another.
Tyranny is not easily conquered, but the harder the conflict the more glorious the triumph. What we obtain too cheaply we esteem too lightly. The Gods know how to put a proper price upon their blessings.
These are the times that try our souls. The summer soldier will shrink from the service of their calling, but she who stands in the path of doom deserves the love and thanks of all. Yet let not that praise overwhelm or create in such person an idol to be propped up as a paragon, for times change, as all things do, and people find novel ways to destroy one another or re-discover old brutalities to inflict upon one another.
Tyranny is not easily conquered, but the harder the conflict the more glorious the triumph. What we obtain too cheaply we esteem too lightly. The Gods know how to put a proper price upon their blessings.
Written By Monique
Aug. 8, 2020, 10:25 p.m.(10/20/1013 AR)
Relationship Note on Neilda
Just don't adventure too far, hm? I like having you in the city. No one else listens so intently to my tales! Nor provides such sharp insight and thought-provoking questions. Where does it go, indeed.
Written By Sunniva
Aug. 8, 2020, 9:54 p.m.(10/20/1013 AR)
Relationship Note on Apollo
You have proven to be a man of exceptional talents and even greater morals. I consider myself lucky to have your trust and to receive your counsel. You always seem to view things differently than I do, and help me see the world in a way I never would have otherwise.
Written By Tyrus
Aug. 8, 2020, 8:34 p.m.(10/20/1013 AR)
Relationship Note on Niklas
I am in the particular situation where I have known a time when I commanded thralls, when Donrai still ruled, and a time when I myself was a slave.
I don't have to imagine the horrors of slavery to feel the hatred a slave feels for the one that wields the whip and holds the chains. It is something I know quite well, down to my very core.
So when someone says "Death to slavers!", I expect them to act in accordance to their words. Because if you're going to tap into that hatred and anger? You'd best actually deliver on that decisive action.
And lest there be any misunderstandings. I would be more than happy to see them all dead. It won't give me back my daughter nor my wife. It won't give me back the friends I've lost, who died when they could no longer endure the work or the whip. But I know I would feel satisfaction at seeing them die amidst the ashes of all they hold dear.
The point of my previous entry was not to argue for mercy for slavers. It was to ask whether those taking up the cry were truly ready to act in accordance to their words.
I don't have to imagine the horrors of slavery to feel the hatred a slave feels for the one that wields the whip and holds the chains. It is something I know quite well, down to my very core.
So when someone says "Death to slavers!", I expect them to act in accordance to their words. Because if you're going to tap into that hatred and anger? You'd best actually deliver on that decisive action.
And lest there be any misunderstandings. I would be more than happy to see them all dead. It won't give me back my daughter nor my wife. It won't give me back the friends I've lost, who died when they could no longer endure the work or the whip. But I know I would feel satisfaction at seeing them die amidst the ashes of all they hold dear.
The point of my previous entry was not to argue for mercy for slavers. It was to ask whether those taking up the cry were truly ready to act in accordance to their words.
Written By Tanith
Aug. 8, 2020, 8:09 p.m.(10/20/1013 AR)
I've seen some insane, stupid things in my life, foolish endeavors, last minute attempts to save face or save lives or save food. But still, not the most dangerous thing. Oh no. The most dangerous thing I've ever witnessed, scholar, was at that surprise party:
An archlector got between a woman and her cake.
I know, scholar. I know.
An archlector got between a woman and her cake.
I know, scholar. I know.
Written By Wylla
Aug. 8, 2020, 5:19 p.m.(10/20/1013 AR)
I continue to be impressed and sometimes amused by the replies I've received. Even with just the few words collected so far, I can feel the potential growing with each one.
Written By Cassandra
Aug. 8, 2020, 4:35 p.m.(10/20/1013 AR)
Relationship Note on Margerie
For as long as I can remember, Margerie Clement nee Keaton has been part of my life. I watched her rise as a Countess and then become Baroness-Consort and she has long been one of my closest allies in my decision to become part of the Faith.
Today, I am proud to be able to give her just a mote of everything she has done for me back. I am proud to call her my protege.
Today, I am proud to be able to give her just a mote of everything she has done for me back. I am proud to call her my protege.
Written By Cassandra
Aug. 8, 2020, 1:56 p.m.(10/20/1013 AR)
I was surprised to read Prince Edain's sudden announcement to abdicate to High Lord Alis and go tilting at sand dunes to try to face the Dune Emperor. I am not sure if this was Gloria's guidance or something else. And that he did not speak of this with Princess Caelis is troubling. I have never been terribly close to the pair as our paths did not cross often in my time in Valardin and less so once I became part of the Faith.
But I can only home that Limerance can soothe the rocky road that was created. I can pray that the Triad looks over Edain on his travels. But their hands are also needed to guide the new High Lord and young Prince Samuel.
But I can only home that Limerance can soothe the rocky road that was created. I can pray that the Triad looks over Edain on his travels. But their hands are also needed to guide the new High Lord and young Prince Samuel.
Written By Gael
Aug. 8, 2020, 1:43 p.m.(10/20/1013 AR)
Relationship Note on Insaya
I've never been cut that hard in my life before,
But I suppose this counts as being hurt in the line of duty? I don't know. It's an odd feeling, I'll tell you, when you feel as if all of your goods are hanging outside from the inside of your torso. Mhm, it's real strange it is, you can feel the red stringing wreathed in blood from which it dangles pulling, tugging from where all organs hang, gravity's weight begging them to just slump out onto the floor because being in my belly and torso and all is just too much work. It's real desperate shit.
Wherefore, heroism? Death, I guess. I'm a real lucky asshole for being alive, and this is just our first assignation together. I'm sure we have some real fucked adventures ahead of us, Inquisitor.
Lagoma protects.
But I suppose this counts as being hurt in the line of duty? I don't know. It's an odd feeling, I'll tell you, when you feel as if all of your goods are hanging outside from the inside of your torso. Mhm, it's real strange it is, you can feel the red stringing wreathed in blood from which it dangles pulling, tugging from where all organs hang, gravity's weight begging them to just slump out onto the floor because being in my belly and torso and all is just too much work. It's real desperate shit.
Wherefore, heroism? Death, I guess. I'm a real lucky asshole for being alive, and this is just our first assignation together. I'm sure we have some real fucked adventures ahead of us, Inquisitor.
Lagoma protects.
Written By Cecilia
Aug. 8, 2020, 1:28 p.m.(10/20/1013 AR)
In my young years I have suffered the loss of much of my family, both my father and mother, as well as my brother Ford and sister Renatta in ways better left unspoken.
Each one of their deaths has shaped me into the young woman I am today and there is not a day that goes by that they are not in my thoughts. Their loss was not preventable or by my choice, but the loss off the rest of my family was mine and mine alone.
With siblings and cousins no longer in Stormward, I chose to remain. Choosing not to surround myself with the love and support of the family I had remaining. This was my choice and I see now it was the wrong one.
Since my return to Arx in recent days, I have been embraced and am beginning to truly feel like I am finally healing those parts of me I thought had long been healed.
I chose to remain in Stormward because it was my home, the source of all my pleasant memories. What I failed to realize was that home is where your family is.
Each one of their deaths has shaped me into the young woman I am today and there is not a day that goes by that they are not in my thoughts. Their loss was not preventable or by my choice, but the loss off the rest of my family was mine and mine alone.
With siblings and cousins no longer in Stormward, I chose to remain. Choosing not to surround myself with the love and support of the family I had remaining. This was my choice and I see now it was the wrong one.
Since my return to Arx in recent days, I have been embraced and am beginning to truly feel like I am finally healing those parts of me I thought had long been healed.
I chose to remain in Stormward because it was my home, the source of all my pleasant memories. What I failed to realize was that home is where your family is.
Written By Sydney
Aug. 8, 2020, 12:32 p.m.(10/20/1013 AR)
Relationship Note on Rukhnis
Let it never be said that Rukhnis Al-Katibi cannot dance.
Please note that the scholars may take some time preparing your journal for others to read.