Written By Killian
Dec. 22, 2017, 11:52 a.m.(10/25/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on Aislin
My dear family,
If you are reading this, then it means that I have failed at last to stand against the enemies we face, and my life is over. I hope you will know that you are the reason I have had a life at all. In the time since I returned to Arx, and was reunited with you all, I have been happy for the first time in my life. I never felt such love and welcome, companionship and warmth. Thank you, so much, from the bottom of my heart.
Aislin, you are the sister I never had, and never knew how desperately i needed. In your company I have been more than I was, and I have learned and grown. I have found the dearest friend I could have hoped for, and I pray that whatever came to pass, I have given you cause to be proud.
Cara, even in death I still curse Addison for the pain he caused you. You are wonderful and worthy, and I sorrow that I shall not get to see your children grow, and to be their uncle. I so desperately wanted to. Know that in my heart, you are truly my sister and I love you.
Harlan, you welcomed me despite the deeds of my brother. You were so much more than your father, and I bent the knee proudly to you.
Olivia, you are too kind and gentle by far. But there is strength in you, even as the roses have their thorns.
Arianna, I am sorry. I should have married you, and now I have missed my chance. But know please, that I loved you, and that you brought me peace and comfort and joy such as I did not believe I would ever experience again. I will be watching over you, in whatever means I might, from whatever fate lies in store for me beyond this life.
I ask no special arrangements for my final rest, other than whatever my family feels is appropriate.
I would ask that Arianna care for Frostbite, as I know that she and Frostbite will love one another and that she will get Frostbite through this. And though I know she believes Whisper dislikes her, I ask that she care for Whisper as well, because truly Whisper was very fond of her.
Should my armor and swords be recovered, I ask that my armor be returned to Cara and Lark, that their kind gift might continue to shield another who is loyal to the Graysons.
Of the two swords I bear, I would ask that Hawks Talon, the blade forged for me and which I carried most of my life, be put aside for whichever of Cara's children might pursue the path of Knighthood and take up blade. It is a true masterpiece and will serve my niece or nephew well, and I shall hope that it watches over them in my place.
The sword I have called Bringer of Dawn, which stood against Brand, I leave to Aislin and Harlan, and the House of Ashford. May it be given into the hand of another Ashford Knight, to guardian the house that showed me the love I had never felt before.
My two loyal retainers, Lisette and Cosette, whom I have known since I was a boy and been reunited with. I thank you so much for your loyalty and service. I ask that money be set aside from my accounts to cover their pensions, but recommend them greatly to Aislin as loyal Ashford retainers.
Of the rest, I leave it to my sister Aislin to see to the dispensation of. I would ask that Reese be given the granite carved set of figurines, as I know that she collects them, and I hope she will always remember fondly a Knight who once trained her and cared very much for her.
My heart breaks, to think that I will never again see you all, or bask in the warmth of your love and embrace. To imagine that, I have seen you for the last time. But I know you are all strong and good and true. Do not lose hope, fight on and always stand against the darkness. Fight on, thrash and struggle and no matter what happens, never submit to defeat. I shall always be there at your side, supporting you with all my heart and spirit.
Forever yours,
Killian Ashford
If you are reading this, then it means that I have failed at last to stand against the enemies we face, and my life is over. I hope you will know that you are the reason I have had a life at all. In the time since I returned to Arx, and was reunited with you all, I have been happy for the first time in my life. I never felt such love and welcome, companionship and warmth. Thank you, so much, from the bottom of my heart.
Aislin, you are the sister I never had, and never knew how desperately i needed. In your company I have been more than I was, and I have learned and grown. I have found the dearest friend I could have hoped for, and I pray that whatever came to pass, I have given you cause to be proud.
Cara, even in death I still curse Addison for the pain he caused you. You are wonderful and worthy, and I sorrow that I shall not get to see your children grow, and to be their uncle. I so desperately wanted to. Know that in my heart, you are truly my sister and I love you.
Harlan, you welcomed me despite the deeds of my brother. You were so much more than your father, and I bent the knee proudly to you.
Olivia, you are too kind and gentle by far. But there is strength in you, even as the roses have their thorns.
Arianna, I am sorry. I should have married you, and now I have missed my chance. But know please, that I loved you, and that you brought me peace and comfort and joy such as I did not believe I would ever experience again. I will be watching over you, in whatever means I might, from whatever fate lies in store for me beyond this life.
I ask no special arrangements for my final rest, other than whatever my family feels is appropriate.
I would ask that Arianna care for Frostbite, as I know that she and Frostbite will love one another and that she will get Frostbite through this. And though I know she believes Whisper dislikes her, I ask that she care for Whisper as well, because truly Whisper was very fond of her.
Should my armor and swords be recovered, I ask that my armor be returned to Cara and Lark, that their kind gift might continue to shield another who is loyal to the Graysons.
Of the two swords I bear, I would ask that Hawks Talon, the blade forged for me and which I carried most of my life, be put aside for whichever of Cara's children might pursue the path of Knighthood and take up blade. It is a true masterpiece and will serve my niece or nephew well, and I shall hope that it watches over them in my place.
The sword I have called Bringer of Dawn, which stood against Brand, I leave to Aislin and Harlan, and the House of Ashford. May it be given into the hand of another Ashford Knight, to guardian the house that showed me the love I had never felt before.
My two loyal retainers, Lisette and Cosette, whom I have known since I was a boy and been reunited with. I thank you so much for your loyalty and service. I ask that money be set aside from my accounts to cover their pensions, but recommend them greatly to Aislin as loyal Ashford retainers.
Of the rest, I leave it to my sister Aislin to see to the dispensation of. I would ask that Reese be given the granite carved set of figurines, as I know that she collects them, and I hope she will always remember fondly a Knight who once trained her and cared very much for her.
My heart breaks, to think that I will never again see you all, or bask in the warmth of your love and embrace. To imagine that, I have seen you for the last time. But I know you are all strong and good and true. Do not lose hope, fight on and always stand against the darkness. Fight on, thrash and struggle and no matter what happens, never submit to defeat. I shall always be there at your side, supporting you with all my heart and spirit.
Forever yours,
Killian Ashford
Written By Aiden
Dec. 22, 2017, 11:49 a.m.(10/25/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on Killian
I didn't know him as well as my brother did when we were all younger and growing up.
But I got to know him recently. He helped me find the Griffins...
Without him, we would not have seen the flight of the griffins and their majestic eggs...
I'm so glad that he got to witness them before duty to the sword took him....
I can think of no other way to honor him but sharing the information about the griffins in book and dedicating it to his memory, and writing about his actions with us that day.
Killian... may you rest well. Your loss scores deep my friend. May the Wheel allow you to return to the world again... for the world needs people like you.
Gods, watch over your Paladin.
*Water splotches on the page*
But I got to know him recently. He helped me find the Griffins...
Without him, we would not have seen the flight of the griffins and their majestic eggs...
I'm so glad that he got to witness them before duty to the sword took him....
I can think of no other way to honor him but sharing the information about the griffins in book and dedicating it to his memory, and writing about his actions with us that day.
Killian... may you rest well. Your loss scores deep my friend. May the Wheel allow you to return to the world again... for the world needs people like you.
Gods, watch over your Paladin.
*Water splotches on the page*
Written By Aleksei
Dec. 22, 2017, 10:55 a.m.(10/25/1007 AR)
I just got back to the city. I don't
What the hell happened
I
How
I can't
What the hell happened
I
How
I can't
Written By Enyo
Dec. 22, 2017, 10:48 a.m.(10/25/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on Killian
I only had the chance to meet you the once, but you seemed very nice. I'm sorry to have heard about what happened.
Written By Eirene
Dec. 22, 2017, 10:22 a.m.(10/25/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on Killian
Went on patrol with him at least once. Never interacted with him much but he was a good soldier and did his duty til the end.
I don't pay much higher compliments than that.
I don't pay much higher compliments than that.
Written By Samantha
Dec. 22, 2017, 10:17 a.m.(10/25/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on Killian
When I was young - well, younger - I spent a great deal of time at Pridehall. I was raised alongside Michael and Lailah as their sister, and Crownlands noble children were often sent there for fostering and squiredom. As one might expect, a little group formed made up of those who clustered in the same age group.
Myself, Barric, Dawn, Ainsley, Michael, with Lailah frequently tagging along and the boys at least constantly telling her that she was too young. Killian was there, too. But Killian was a quiet young man who preferred his own company, and frequently spent time outside alone. He was welcome, but he was solitary.
Despite this distance, we were in each other's circles as children. I've observed him over the years, seen him become a remarkable man. Admired his touch with his beautiful owl, appreciated his wit and skill as a warrior.
And he will be missed. He is a piece of my childhood now adrift, but I have no doubt that the Queen of Endings welcomed him tenderly, and that Gloria will see him blessed when his soul returns to this existence.
Myself, Barric, Dawn, Ainsley, Michael, with Lailah frequently tagging along and the boys at least constantly telling her that she was too young. Killian was there, too. But Killian was a quiet young man who preferred his own company, and frequently spent time outside alone. He was welcome, but he was solitary.
Despite this distance, we were in each other's circles as children. I've observed him over the years, seen him become a remarkable man. Admired his touch with his beautiful owl, appreciated his wit and skill as a warrior.
And he will be missed. He is a piece of my childhood now adrift, but I have no doubt that the Queen of Endings welcomed him tenderly, and that Gloria will see him blessed when his soul returns to this existence.
Written By Calaudrin
Dec. 22, 2017, 8:48 a.m.(10/25/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on Killian
I hate to see young men die. I didn't know him well despite his work with the Iron Guard, at least not on a personal level. But he assisted me in my work a time or two in the past and it was always appreciated. I'll have a drink in your name tonight, kid.
Written By Reese
Dec. 22, 2017, 8:23 a.m.(10/25/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on Killian
My words are not going to do Lord Killian justice and yet I feel compelled by to honor his memory and attempt.
When I first met Killian, I could barely fight and we spared and he beat me soundly and I looked up to him. He was gracious about my lack of skill, having patience, understanding and a willingness to teach me. That feels like forever ago now.
Then Killian became a paladin and fought Brand. He fought Brand, believing he would die and putting the safety of compact before his own life. He never hesitated. He never considered putting himself first.
When I started the missions into the forest to weaken the slaver’s influence, Killian never hesitated, he was one the first to sign up and one of the strongest and consistent believers in what I was doing. He fought in the forest. He lead missions. He was a rock. His faith never flattering, his fight against the abyss never stopping.
When Killian was badly scarred after taking on a foe of the abyss in the forest by himself, he never made a big deal about it and to those of us who loved and still love him, he was and is as beautiful as ever. His scars, the mark of a man willing to protect us all at any cost to himself.
I was called to Maelstrom before we even left the forest after we were done with a dangerous battle against agents of the slavers who attacked our camp. A battle we came close to losing and might have lost without Killian. The first words out of Killian were I will come with you. I started to wonder if we could handle it, Killian never did and his strength gave me strength.
We fought together at Maelstrom facing hordes of zombies who tried to storm the city and Killian’s blade hit true, again and again.
When the gods granted me a vision of something dangerous that must be done to protect Compact, Killian never hesitated to come with me into the forest, to fight the abyss again. Even when I said this might kill us. When I almost died in that forest, Killian was there for me and the abyss was defeated once more.
We ran into the murders of Dame Zhayla on the docks before they found her. I wanted to take them them alive, to question them, to have mercy. Killian knew their true nature. He chased after them. He saved Lord Karadoc’s life. He was almost killed.We went after Dame Zhayla’s killers, evil men he fought before and almost died to before and Killian never hesitated, he never wavered. Getting these men helped to protect us all in ways that cannot be fully explained in a journal.
Killian used his last breath, his last words, giving us the way to defeat her killers. The way to stop their evil, the way to save ourselves. We lived because of his plan. Dame Zhayla’s murders were destroyed because of his plan and compact is safer because his actions that day.
Lord Killian Ashford is a hero. Our lives are dimmer without him and yet we will continue the fight against the abyss. Killian would want nothing more than then abyss to be defeated and us to fight on, I believe.
Reese
When I first met Killian, I could barely fight and we spared and he beat me soundly and I looked up to him. He was gracious about my lack of skill, having patience, understanding and a willingness to teach me. That feels like forever ago now.
Then Killian became a paladin and fought Brand. He fought Brand, believing he would die and putting the safety of compact before his own life. He never hesitated. He never considered putting himself first.
When I started the missions into the forest to weaken the slaver’s influence, Killian never hesitated, he was one the first to sign up and one of the strongest and consistent believers in what I was doing. He fought in the forest. He lead missions. He was a rock. His faith never flattering, his fight against the abyss never stopping.
When Killian was badly scarred after taking on a foe of the abyss in the forest by himself, he never made a big deal about it and to those of us who loved and still love him, he was and is as beautiful as ever. His scars, the mark of a man willing to protect us all at any cost to himself.
I was called to Maelstrom before we even left the forest after we were done with a dangerous battle against agents of the slavers who attacked our camp. A battle we came close to losing and might have lost without Killian. The first words out of Killian were I will come with you. I started to wonder if we could handle it, Killian never did and his strength gave me strength.
We fought together at Maelstrom facing hordes of zombies who tried to storm the city and Killian’s blade hit true, again and again.
When the gods granted me a vision of something dangerous that must be done to protect Compact, Killian never hesitated to come with me into the forest, to fight the abyss again. Even when I said this might kill us. When I almost died in that forest, Killian was there for me and the abyss was defeated once more.
We ran into the murders of Dame Zhayla on the docks before they found her. I wanted to take them them alive, to question them, to have mercy. Killian knew their true nature. He chased after them. He saved Lord Karadoc’s life. He was almost killed.We went after Dame Zhayla’s killers, evil men he fought before and almost died to before and Killian never hesitated, he never wavered. Getting these men helped to protect us all in ways that cannot be fully explained in a journal.
Killian used his last breath, his last words, giving us the way to defeat her killers. The way to stop their evil, the way to save ourselves. We lived because of his plan. Dame Zhayla’s murders were destroyed because of his plan and compact is safer because his actions that day.
Lord Killian Ashford is a hero. Our lives are dimmer without him and yet we will continue the fight against the abyss. Killian would want nothing more than then abyss to be defeated and us to fight on, I believe.
Reese
Written By Reigna
Dec. 22, 2017, 2:13 a.m.(10/25/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on Killian
I am still awake. It has been 42 hours since I have slept. I have fought to keep Princess Marian Redrain alive. Goodman Aksel. Sparte Fatchforth. I have assisted in surgery, stitched wounds, packed them, smeared salve, cut away necrotic tissue, watched wounds be cleansed with holy water and holy fire. I have avoided inhaling haze as it dulled the pain of the patient. I have been wrist deep in blood for hours.
And in this time... a man I met in the House of Solace as I was healing him... a man I only just discovered was blood family... a man I had drinks with in the Ambassador just yesterday... he is gone. I cannot imagine the pain House Ashford must feel. I feel, in a sense, I am not justified in feeling this loss so sharply. Afterall, I only just really got to know him yesterday.
Yesterday he was smiling. He was warm. He was... a hero. I looked at him and I saw every dream I had as a child. He had purpose, he had faith. Family. He was brave.
To you, cousin. May we know each other better on the next turn of the wheel.
And in this time... a man I met in the House of Solace as I was healing him... a man I only just discovered was blood family... a man I had drinks with in the Ambassador just yesterday... he is gone. I cannot imagine the pain House Ashford must feel. I feel, in a sense, I am not justified in feeling this loss so sharply. Afterall, I only just really got to know him yesterday.
Yesterday he was smiling. He was warm. He was... a hero. I looked at him and I saw every dream I had as a child. He had purpose, he had faith. Family. He was brave.
To you, cousin. May we know each other better on the next turn of the wheel.
Written By Karadoc
Dec. 22, 2017, 12:41 a.m.(10/24/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on Killian
I have been mulling it over for weeks, now. It happened and I did not recognize it happened.
Lord Killian Ashford saved my life.
I was on the docks, employing my charm and my words with strange men. At the time, I thought him hasty. I thought, given the chance, I might have been able to accomplish some easing.
He threw me to the docks and fought men and dogs while I bungled about in a forest of legs. I was able to escape. I should not put it with so much dignity. I ran screaming for help. I was ill-equipped for anything else. I wandered in the dark. I found myself home. Mulled wine and a fire dulls memories, but not entirely. Those dogs with too many teeth. The too-near flash of blades.
I did not realize enough to be grateful. How sheltered I have been. How protected that a frightening trip to the docks is an unexpected adventure that leaves me with quickly healed scrapes, a shiver of fear, and an impression of a hero.
Now it is too late, and I am sorry for it. I would be in the Shining Lands myself if not for his courage and strength.
Lord Killian Ashford saved my life.
I was on the docks, employing my charm and my words with strange men. At the time, I thought him hasty. I thought, given the chance, I might have been able to accomplish some easing.
He threw me to the docks and fought men and dogs while I bungled about in a forest of legs. I was able to escape. I should not put it with so much dignity. I ran screaming for help. I was ill-equipped for anything else. I wandered in the dark. I found myself home. Mulled wine and a fire dulls memories, but not entirely. Those dogs with too many teeth. The too-near flash of blades.
I did not realize enough to be grateful. How sheltered I have been. How protected that a frightening trip to the docks is an unexpected adventure that leaves me with quickly healed scrapes, a shiver of fear, and an impression of a hero.
Now it is too late, and I am sorry for it. I would be in the Shining Lands myself if not for his courage and strength.
Written By Reigna
Dec. 21, 2017, 10:52 p.m.(10/24/1007 AR)
I have not slept in over forty hours and my eyes are bleary, hardly able to read these words. I have been working with a number of remarkable healers, mercy and physician alike. I assisted Lady Eirene Malvici in surgery on Princess Marian and it was... there is always more to learn, and the Lady Malvici is a font of knowledge.
I feel like everything I thought was the world was simply an illusion writ on onion skin and there is so much more to know, to understand and to see. I have all of these puzzle pieces and I just cannot yet figure out how it all fits together.
I am tired.
My tormentor has been dealt with. I have not the energy yet to even feel relief. I feel...
Tired.
I feel like everything I thought was the world was simply an illusion writ on onion skin and there is so much more to know, to understand and to see. I have all of these puzzle pieces and I just cannot yet figure out how it all fits together.
I am tired.
My tormentor has been dealt with. I have not the energy yet to even feel relief. I feel...
Tired.
Written By Thesarin
Dec. 21, 2017, 7:28 p.m.(10/24/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on Samantha
A long while back, at a friend's grave, Eshkorin Greenblood told me a good chief can't spend time dwelling on things happened and can't be changed, and a good chief can't help dwelling.
When I asked him how that worked, he laughed and asked me to share the trick if I worked it out.
Some twenty winters since, I'd ask the same of you.
When I asked him how that worked, he laughed and asked me to share the trick if I worked it out.
Some twenty winters since, I'd ask the same of you.
Written By Sophie
Dec. 21, 2017, 5:54 p.m.(10/24/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on Eirene
Ah, my dear Eirene has paid me quite the compliment in saying she wants none other than myself to see her purified and stitched up should she be carved and infected by agents of the Abyss.
In truth, though, she is stubborn enough to attempt doing it herself, and I suspect she'd be a fair hand at it, too.
Unless she were unconscious. Even then, on some level, I'm sure that she'd nonetheless try.
May we never have to find out.
In truth, though, she is stubborn enough to attempt doing it herself, and I suspect she'd be a fair hand at it, too.
Unless she were unconscious. Even then, on some level, I'm sure that she'd nonetheless try.
May we never have to find out.
Written By Sorrel
Dec. 21, 2017, 5:13 p.m.(10/24/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on Lucita
I am very glad that I have met Lady Lucita. She has proven to be a most useful friend in getting about town and meeting new people. In fact, she's kindly introduced me to other people who love music, and that really is a delight. I hope that her betrothed is kind enough to provide her with the music room she desires. She certainly deserves it. Hopefully, we'll have the opportunity to have a musically themed party soon.
Written By Eirene
Dec. 21, 2017, 4:35 p.m.(10/24/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on Marian
Just got her out of surgery. Won't print an untruth here, she may still die. But there's a stronger fucking chance she'll live now. No offense to my dear Mercy friends, but when it comes to trauma surgery with an abyssal taint thrown in, I'm probably the number one person in Arx you want standing over you with a knife and a readiness to keep your blood on the inside.
Not that I'm bragging. Just fucking true.
Only person I want standing over me with a knife if I'm wounded and infected is Sophie, for the record.
Now don't die, you bitch. I'll look like an asshole if you die.
Aksel - well. I couldn't do much for him at the moment. Maybe we'll see how he progresses under observation. If he stabilizes more I might be able to help.
Not that I'm bragging. Just fucking true.
Only person I want standing over me with a knife if I'm wounded and infected is Sophie, for the record.
Now don't die, you bitch. I'll look like an asshole if you die.
Aksel - well. I couldn't do much for him at the moment. Maybe we'll see how he progresses under observation. If he stabilizes more I might be able to help.
Written By Costas
Dec. 21, 2017, 4:28 p.m.(10/24/1007 AR)
In the wake of so many meditations upon death I find myself consumed by reverie of the lost.
Hold firm your grip to those beloved around you. Make forgiveness, compromise, and love your sacraments. End quarrels quickly, or risk bitter last words forever casting shadows over the greatest of your memories.
Hold firm your grip to those beloved around you. Make forgiveness, compromise, and love your sacraments. End quarrels quickly, or risk bitter last words forever casting shadows over the greatest of your memories.
Written By Shard
Dec. 21, 2017, 3:57 p.m.(10/24/1007 AR)
In my tribe, ravens were seen as guides and messengers, although not at all the sort that were above tricking or harassing you if they were in the mood. I've seen them rob eagles of their kills. They regularly lead wolf packs to dead animals with hides too thick for their beaks to tear through. They're damned clever birds. They're also greedy little shits with an eye for anything that shines or sparkles, so bargains and offerings can be made without too much trouble, if you're not an idiot.
We always associated them with death and ancestor spirits, so it was disappointing to learn Death is a goddess and she actually likes spiders and bats (and terrible, terrible puns) instead. Still, since when does truth really hurt good stories?
We always associated them with death and ancestor spirits, so it was disappointing to learn Death is a goddess and she actually likes spiders and bats (and terrible, terrible puns) instead. Still, since when does truth really hurt good stories?
Written By Mae
Dec. 21, 2017, 1:50 p.m.(10/24/1007 AR)
I held two women as they wept. As they felt true sorrow over the death of a friend, a family member, a faithful protector of the Compact.
I had to leave those two behind, in their despair, to go deliver a child into this world.
That baby sure could cry. Funny how crying works like that.
We are all spun from Death's own self and put into this world. We all return to her when we leave it. And whether your soul is spun again and sent back for another turn, or whether it moves on to Elysia, we all can be confident that we will continue on. In this world, or in paradise.
Non Omnis Moriar.
I had to leave those two behind, in their despair, to go deliver a child into this world.
That baby sure could cry. Funny how crying works like that.
We are all spun from Death's own self and put into this world. We all return to her when we leave it. And whether your soul is spun again and sent back for another turn, or whether it moves on to Elysia, we all can be confident that we will continue on. In this world, or in paradise.
Non Omnis Moriar.
Written By Isidora
Dec. 21, 2017, 12:53 p.m.(10/23/1007 AR)
I have never been one of those women that smile a lot and wrap people up in hugs. It does not mean that I do not feel warmth, it just is not my way to do things. Sometimes I envy the closeness that seems to be cultivated by that contact. The way that other women reach out to each other and wrap their arms through each others. Or how people embrace when the other enters; greeting each other the way a favored pet sees it's master. I am not untouched by it, but I am removed from it. I fear that my smiles are much rarer and a touch of my hand (even as light and swift as it will be) may be that same type of hug to state my meaning. I am a Valardin. I do not mind being thought of cold or that people look at me with pity when I speak that I should wish to do my duty and not cloud such things with fleeting affections. Perhaps in time this will change, but I think it is just who I am. I am not upset by this nor do I desire the change. Sometimes though, I envy another's ease to make friends because they are this type of person. Although, I am happy with my books and my medical knowledge.
Written By Carita
Dec. 21, 2017, 12:52 p.m.(10/23/1007 AR)
Even the idea of locking someone away like that is abominable. To keep a life locked away is prison rather than keeping the world out.
Strange, that I am thinking about it...
Strange, that I am thinking about it...
Please note that the scholars may take some time preparing your journal for others to read.