Written By Isolde
Jan. 30, 2017, 1:32 p.m.(10/20/1005 AR)
The Faith killed my sister.
I am torn to shreds, everything I believe, everything I know wars within me.
Tehom, for I write thy name boldly, keep me whole.
My sister is dead. I can't breathe. It should have been me, not her. Her light, so bright, it is gone from the world. I do not know if I will ever see again, breathe again.
It's quiet uptown.
I am torn to shreds, everything I believe, everything I know wars within me.
Tehom, for I write thy name boldly, keep me whole.
My sister is dead. I can't breathe. It should have been me, not her. Her light, so bright, it is gone from the world. I do not know if I will ever see again, breathe again.
It's quiet uptown.
Written By Lyiana
Jan. 30, 2017, 11:31 a.m.(10/19/1005 AR)
I am sometimes afraid for what may lie ahead for the next day. The turning of the sun is like a spinning wheel and you never know what will happen the next day, how one would survive upon the coming storm of doubt and discord. For now, I will do my best. I am nervous about the unrest though in the city, though perhaps it is just my imagination. Or perhaps not. Until then, I shall make my pretty colors, live in the world of fabric I have built for myself, and stay out of the way. I tend to do this often because I do not know what to say or do. It is strange being awkward in social situations, especially if you are used to being overlooked. Now, I am not overlooked or put aside and it feels strange. I have my shop and I am content to do right by the world as it stands.
Written By Bianca
Jan. 30, 2017, 3:54 a.m.(10/18/1005 AR)
I want to have faith in man, but as every day passes I find that evil that we whisper of as influence of the demonic isn't influence at all. That evil seems to reside within us naturally and it is not the demonic that calls it into being, but instead simply pulls the string of the selfish and near-sighted to bring it to the fore. Ego commands us.
Perhaps that in it of itself is the reflection. Our darkness staring back at us and waiting for its hopeful (or inevitable) release.
Or... perhaps this moment of introspection is just a side effect of a crisis of faith in a more general sense. It's difficult to tell these days. Even my beliefs are no longer sacred, just more twisted truths based on the ego of man and manipulated by something still well beyond our common understanding.
Tomorrow I will wake up and I will pray.
I will eat and then I will pray.
I will study and I will pray.
In all things prayer has become a constant.
Is it the ritual that comforts me or is it still an unwavering belief that someone is listening? That something will pull forth the beauty, hope and joy that is being human again so that the tug of war of the spirit remains balanced?
I want to believe, but how many more of us must fall to death or darkness before our gods stop standing idle?
There's a sickness in this city. A poison. I'm not the only one that's felt it, but I'm helpless to purge it. I am helpless to do anything, but read my books and hope that I pass on the right information to the right person at the right time.
That's what I pray for now. Not that I will have the strength to overcome the impossible, but that I will have the insight to help others on their own journeys of overcoming the impossible.
Anyone no matter caste or general standing has the potential to be a hero as much as they have the potential to be a villain. If the gods won't pull us back from the precipice of destruction and corruption, then we must pull ourselves. We must reach with open eyes, hearts and minds from the lowest to the highest and stand together as one before our egos divide us any further and we fall to the grips of damnation.
Perhaps that in it of itself is the reflection. Our darkness staring back at us and waiting for its hopeful (or inevitable) release.
Or... perhaps this moment of introspection is just a side effect of a crisis of faith in a more general sense. It's difficult to tell these days. Even my beliefs are no longer sacred, just more twisted truths based on the ego of man and manipulated by something still well beyond our common understanding.
Tomorrow I will wake up and I will pray.
I will eat and then I will pray.
I will study and I will pray.
In all things prayer has become a constant.
Is it the ritual that comforts me or is it still an unwavering belief that someone is listening? That something will pull forth the beauty, hope and joy that is being human again so that the tug of war of the spirit remains balanced?
I want to believe, but how many more of us must fall to death or darkness before our gods stop standing idle?
There's a sickness in this city. A poison. I'm not the only one that's felt it, but I'm helpless to purge it. I am helpless to do anything, but read my books and hope that I pass on the right information to the right person at the right time.
That's what I pray for now. Not that I will have the strength to overcome the impossible, but that I will have the insight to help others on their own journeys of overcoming the impossible.
Anyone no matter caste or general standing has the potential to be a hero as much as they have the potential to be a villain. If the gods won't pull us back from the precipice of destruction and corruption, then we must pull ourselves. We must reach with open eyes, hearts and minds from the lowest to the highest and stand together as one before our egos divide us any further and we fall to the grips of damnation.
Written By Audric
Jan. 30, 2017, 3:50 a.m.(10/18/1005 AR)
Ah, my lovely journal. My constant companion, the one who is without judgment. Am I saddened by recent events? Of course. Archduchess Esera and I got along the few times that we spoke. Donrai was relatively funny. Leo was fun to mock, and Dawn was fun to vex. Maybe one or two of them still live, and may see this? Who knows! I've never kept my entertainments with people private. It's one of those things that a lot of people just don't quite grasp, but a sellsword does. We laugh when a brother in arms dies. We mock them, and we make fun of their flaws. Because it is all done in good cheer, and good fun, and a companion doesn't mourn their loss! They honor the story that they told, and they look forward to seeing them again at some point. Here's my point, my dearest journal: Death comes to us all. We throw ourselves into danger, into tribulation, because life is fun. Because telling a boring story just isn't a life worth living. And then we laugh at each others' fuckups once we're dead, because we know our friends will laugh at ours.
Written By Merek
Jan. 30, 2017, 2:25 a.m.(10/18/1005 AR)
Relationship Note on Reese
I have been serving alongside Princess Reese. She is quite nice, and skilled as a member of the Iron Guard. I hope that we are able to work together more.
Written By Calista
Jan. 30, 2017, 1:47 a.m.(10/18/1005 AR)
It is my turn to ache now and the feeling is a slow and menacing burn.
Written By Silas
Jan. 30, 2017, 12:55 a.m.(10/18/1005 AR)
keep
calm
and
drink
on
calm
and
drink
on
Written By Aislin
Jan. 30, 2017, 12:50 a.m.(10/18/1005 AR)
You had better be all right, somewhere out there. I've mourned you once, and I damned well refuse to do it again.
I said it before; I do not have so many good friends that I will give one up easily. Come home safe.
Or I'll...
I'll...
I said it before; I do not have so many good friends that I will give one up easily. Come home safe.
Or I'll...
I'll...
Written By Demura
Jan. 30, 2017, 12:17 a.m.(10/18/1005 AR)
Dreary day, but at least the dogs seem happy.
Written By Demura
Jan. 30, 2017, 12:17 a.m.(10/18/1005 AR)
Trouble brews throughout Arx. Disturbing rumors and heavy gossip of conspirators. This, embellished by the news of Archduchess Esera's fall. Soon, matters of the house will come into play. I must make sure to aspire to grant my line the best opportunity possible to re-establish what was once a bright brilliant beacon of glory and honor.
Written By Demura
Jan. 30, 2017, 12:10 a.m.(10/18/1005 AR)
Relationship Note on Rymarr
It's been a long time, brother. I wonder who you are now, what you think of me. I feel like we never got to know one another growing up, there were too many things that were more important. Maybe we can start again, as many battles have come and gone; Here I still stand, the rock you entrusted with the future of the family. How I loathed and loved you so for the burden.
Written By Brianna
Jan. 29, 2017, 11:57 p.m.(10/18/1005 AR)
Perhaps it's time to set fire to the forest and rebuild in its ashes.
Written By Niccolo
Jan. 29, 2017, 11:55 p.m.(10/18/1005 AR)
Relationship Note on Natalia
Thank you.
Written By Niccolo
Jan. 29, 2017, 11:55 p.m.(10/18/1005 AR)
Relationship Note on Deva
The princess is a very good friend of my daughter, and now she's starting to become a very good friend to me. She is young, passionate, even impetuous. But she is smart, determined, loyal and dedicated. She's recently offered me words of support, words that I much needed during a very difficult time, and for that, she will always have my gratitude and my affection.
Written By Takruid
Jan. 29, 2017, 11:48 p.m.(10/18/1005 AR)
Relationship Note on Luca
At some point I'll have to earn the name bladeling properly with this shirtless silk.
Written By Takruid
Jan. 29, 2017, 11:47 p.m.(10/18/1005 AR)
Seems like the silks really don't have a clue what is happening in the city. The more rumblings I see from the lower boroughs the more I wonder if they don't secretly hope the bringers will just attack and solve all their indecisions for them. It's easy to raise the banner, to order the charge, to know these things are my enemy... But when it's the folk in the streets, the unhappy masses, they don't have a clue.
Written By Rainier
Jan. 29, 2017, 11:45 p.m.(10/18/1005 AR)
Relationship Note on Rymarr
The new Lord Commander is an honorable man and he is a rigid one. His tenacity and adherence to duty must be commended. What I have yet to see is what happens when duty leads him where he must commit dishonorable things or be flexible; when the past gives no answer and the legends who walked before has can yield no help any more.
We do not live in stories. We live now, with a broken King and daggers closing in. He can stop the ones who rush in blazing in the day; I must do what must be to find the ones smuggled through in the dark.
Will we trust each other? None of us is prone to it.
We do not live in stories. We live now, with a broken King and daggers closing in. He can stop the ones who rush in blazing in the day; I must do what must be to find the ones smuggled through in the dark.
Will we trust each other? None of us is prone to it.
Written By Rainier
Jan. 29, 2017, 11:42 p.m.(10/18/1005 AR)
Relationship Note on Calliope
So we know each other - we have for years. In fact we are childhood... friends? Friends. If toddlers have have those instead of playmates, and if Pigtails was that; I remember her running with us. Our knees bruised and bloodied, she could see them, and still came - didn't she have dolls to play with? It made little sense then and it does less now. But I will need that mind of hers; it cuts. Who has honed it, and to what end? A weapon discarded, only to be picked up now when we are marching to do war against no one we can name, against nothing we can see.
Is that fate? Or is it desperation? Is this what it feels to grasp at straws?
Is that fate? Or is it desperation? Is this what it feels to grasp at straws?
Written By Joslyn
Jan. 29, 2017, 11:41 p.m.(10/18/1005 AR)
Relationship Note on Lyiana
A lovely young tailor that I met in a inn. Must remember to meet with her again, she is quite beautiful.
Written By Joslyn
Jan. 29, 2017, 11:40 p.m.(10/18/1005 AR)
Relationship Note on Leola
Met her while visiting Juliet. She's very cute, and works with animals. Note to self: Take the time to get to know her better. Promised to give her a makeover.
Please note that the scholars may take some time preparing your journal for others to read.