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Written By Sabella

Jan. 10, 2019, 5:33 p.m.(5/3/1010 AR)

Opening night was so incredibly wonderful I am walking about wondering if I am still somehow having the most delicious dream! Being up on stage and not watching from the seats! The intense feelings of anxiety and nervousness melting away as the first notes of music started and the only thing to do was become the character and sing! It was exquisite! I have for so very long in my life wanted to be up on the stage, to hear the applause, to have people laugh at the words I spoke and bring them to tears in another moment! It is intoxicating! For many years I was very discouraged that I never seemed to be able to make the leap, but now I know that nothing would ever have been as sweet as having my first debut be in a brand new type of play--a musical!--that my very own husband wrote. It was perfect. Completely, utterly perfect! I don't know that I shall ever see the like of opening night again.

Although I shall do my very best to recreate the performance for all our other engagements!

And of course, I must thank all of the other wonderful players who had such patience with me during rehearsals and give me so much to play off of every night! You are all amazingly and astoundingly talented!

The Nightingale and the Playwright deserve all the acclaim I am hearing and more!

Written By Sabella

Jan. 10, 2019, 10:23 a.m.(5/2/1010 AR)

While there has certainly been troubling news coming in I hear a great many people laying the blame at the feet (or stones) of the Great Road. Please remember that while bad things may be happening, so are good things. Because of the road trade has increased. Food that might otherwise spoil is more quickly finding its way to the market and thus to the tables of those who would have gone without. For many of the skirmishes I am hearing about it seems that there are deeply running grudges that would have come to a head even if the road had not been there, although it being built may have helped give those prone to violence an excuse to do so.

But those who seek to harm others will often find any excuse and invent one when there is nothing else to blame.

Surely there had been terrible news, but the road has given those who seek shelter and safety a place to find it. And perhaps shown the true colors of many around us on all sides.

Written By Sabella

Dec. 25, 2018, 12:35 a.m.(3/25/1010 AR)

I am setting up a fundraiser to help families who have lost loved ones in the recent and not-so-recent conflicts Arx has seen. This charity will take the form of providing funds for families in need, donations of clothing and books, and even space in as an apprentice or squire or something of the same to children of those who fell in defense of us all to secure their futures. There will be a raffle to raise funds and I am accepting donations of things to be raffled off, so please contact me if you have something or know of someone who might!

Written By Sabella

Dec. 25, 2018, 12:30 a.m.(3/25/1010 AR)

Weddings are always delightful. Such a happy time where everyone is celebrating you, a big party thrown in your honor. Marriage is the part that comes after and is the part that is not often talked about or if it is, it is usually only in happy tones so as to not scare away those who have not gotten to that part in their lives. There are many, many wonderful aspects of marriage, but it can be difficult. You are sharing your life, your space, everything with another person who you may or may not have known very well before the contracts were signed. I am very lucky that my husband is a wonderful man who I love with all my heart, but there was an adjustment period where we both had to learn how to be together all the time when we were used to living on our own. In my case, he came into my home and we adjusted by moving into a larger room in our manor that was less mine and more ours. That we decorated together to make a new space that could reflect both of us. It was wonderful and strange and hard and lovely and is still challenging and amazing and I wouldn't trade it for anything. Even when some days can be more difficult than others, we have over a year's worth of wonderful memories that we can rely on to get us through.

And Niklas is very good at apologies.

Written By Sabella

Dec. 23, 2018, 6:49 p.m.(3/22/1010 AR)

When things are at their darkest that is when light shines the brightest. You may not be able to see it just yet. Maybe it's around the next corner or even behind you, but it is there.

The place people most often overlook is within themselves.

Written By Sabella

Dec. 21, 2018, 3:37 p.m.(3/18/1010 AR)

A shooting star! Usually I think there is nothing more lovely than seeing the stars, but seeing them last night after so many days of rain and snow made them just dazzling! You never realize how much you miss something until it is presented to you once again. I even took Relara out (all bundled up of course!) during one of her feedings so she could see them. She seemed just as taken with them as I was. She is surely a future poet or story teller or star chaser or all of the above!

Evenings like this, when the world is still and the stars are sparkling, they are completely magical!

Written By Sabella

Dec. 18, 2018, 8:58 p.m.(3/12/1010 AR)

I am not as sick this time around, but it seems the world is more full of sadness. I am doing my best to push past it, but sometimes it seems overwhelming. I swear the sky itself is crying these days. But, at least that's better than that strange snow. I am very glad that is over and shall be redoubling my efforts to help the people in this city and to help Arx remember what makes it so great--all the wonderful people that live within it! My fundraiser is slowly coming together and we finally have a full committee to move forward with a grand city wide festival: A Taste of Arx! I cannot wait to see this city come together to celebrate our similarities and differences!

And of course to win amazing prizes!

There are many things to be excited about. Tomorrow is always fresh and full of waiting joys with no mistakes in it yet.

Tomorrow is always the promise of a better day.

Written By Sabella

Dec. 8, 2018, 10:04 a.m.(2/20/1010 AR)

My darling goose you are three months old! There are smiles and baby belly laughs and you grow more aware with each passing day! You tease us with trying to roll over but never quite make it--perhaps because I am loathe to put you down the times I see you and just want to hold you and cuddle you all day! You are so fat! It is just darling! Your rosy cheeks and golden curls (all at the very top of your head) are inspiring! You certainly recognize your father and I know and are all smiles for everyone you ever meet! Elizabetta tells me she has never seen a happier baby in all of her life!

I hope to present you with a world as you grow that never stops you from smiling.

Written By Sabella

Dec. 2, 2018, 7:29 p.m.(2/8/1010 AR)

Sometimes my husband reminds me of his brilliance in ways that surprise even me.

Written By Sabella

Nov. 29, 2018, 4:04 p.m.(2/2/1010 AR)

Relationship Note on Niklas

It has been a year since the impossible dream was realized and I was married to the most brilliant man in the Compact! There are days when things pass by like a blissful dream and I wonder how I was so lucky as to meet him after our chance dance at the opera masquerade. I have never shared a connection so deep with anyone. I remember the days before we had the union blessed when seeing him from across a room would make my heart race and I lived for receiving his exquisite messages, sent all throughout the day and night. His written words woo'd me as surely as his smiles did, and had anyone told my younger self that I'd fall for a Thraxian playwright Lord I would have laughed aloud and dismissed the idea as idle fancy. Yet, here we are with a baby on the hip and another on the way and I've never been happier in my entire life!

And it isn't a dream and I still live for his smiles and his letters and his words.

Happy first anniversary, my love! To many more dreamy years to come!

Written By Sabella

Nov. 25, 2018, 8:44 a.m.(1/21/1010 AR)

The ball last night was just what I needed and I am grateful to my cousin, Princess Liara for throwing it and to the King for allowing it to be held in the palace! Clearly, based on the way my feet basically carried me from one dance to the next, I desperately needed the break and I was able to meet so many new people! It was truly a glorious time!

I have been careful to hide my grief these past few days when I am out and about, but his lack of presence is still there. I went into the library for the first time and it seemed so empty. His gravitas was always an ever present thing and now no one will be there to yell at me when I leave piles of books about for the book cleaners.

Life still moves on. Relara is getting bigger and smiling and while I am sad to know that she will never know him, I am glad that she will experience a world that's a little more free of darkness thanks to him.

Written By Sabella

Nov. 24, 2018, 11:54 a.m.(1/19/1010 AR)

The ball is today?! Why didn't anyone remind me?! I have absolutely nothing to wear!

Written By Sabella

Nov. 19, 2018, 11:24 a.m.(1/9/1010 AR)

Relationship Note on Octavia

You sound just like your brother!

Written By Sabella

Nov. 15, 2018, 12:45 p.m.(1/1/1010 AR)

Grayson Family dinner tonight was to be an introduction of Relara to the family. A joyous affair. And while we do intend on bringing Relara tonight, we also recognize that this will likely be a more somber gathering with many reflections of our own Prince Gareth and Sir Jordan Ober, who died so bravely for us all.

So, I would like to make it plain that anyone who reads this white that had interactions or relationships with either of them is welcome to stop by tonight to share your stories or just be comforted and share your grief with the rest of us as we offer our condolences to each other. Food and drink will be provided.

And yes. The invitation is extended even to you.

Written By Sabella

Nov. 13, 2018, 1:33 p.m.(12/25/1009 AR)

Relationship Note on Gareth

It is no secret among my cousins that when we were children and one visited Bastion you were going to be roped into a game of Knights and Princesses at some point. Sometimes more than one because it was the only thing I ever played or wanted to play when we weren't in lessons. Where I'd be a Princess locked high in a tower by some wicked Knight or Dragon or Gardner or War Lord and my sisters and cousins would fight to rescue me or keep me imprisoned, with me squealing gleefully all the while while I watched from a perch in the window pretending to swoon and practicing grand speeches of thanks.

When I was six I remember my cousin Prince Gareth coming over and being the very best brave knight of them all. While everyone else would just clack wooden swords together and shout, he actually scaled up the vines to clamber into the window one day, grabbed me up, and jumped back down to deliver me to my mother unharmed! A feat which I marveled at for many years and that I remember in vivid detail, if one allows that I really thought the window was much higher then it actually was upon seeing it recently when I visited. He then rallied the other children to go defeat the leeches that lived in the nearby creek and that's how I have always thought of and remembered him, wearing this big smile, completely full of life and unwilling to stop until every shadow had been defeated and every princess saved. He was a hero.

He was always my favorite cousin. I still saw him like that even after the incident that gave him his walking stick, the clacking of which I know caused many to cringe, but to me was as welcome as a mother's tap on the door to welcome you to a new day. People said and thought a great many things about him. Almost all of them were wrong. I adored talking to him even after what he had been through hardened and scarred him. Most people saw a used up old Prince who had been broken by a bad mistake and lashed out because of his ill fortune. But he wasn't broken. It didn't break him. It reforged him. I know I irritated him immensely with my good cheer. But there was still hope in him. He still carried the light he always had, he was still full of life and unwilling to stop until every shadow had been defeated and every princess saved. He was a hero. He was hard on people so they wouldn't have to learn the hard lessons of life the way he did. He wanted to stop the darkness before it had a chance to hurt anyone else again. He bore the scars so that we wouldn't have to.

And now that light is gone. He is dead because when the shadows came he wouldn't stop and he didn't stop and while he fell he helped defeat them so everyone was saved.

He's still my hero. And I am going to miss him dreadfully.

Written By Sabella

Nov. 9, 2018, 10:46 a.m.(12/17/1009 AR)

My darling Relara you are a month old! People warned me that time would fly by and I have to say that during the long nights of lots of waking up I sometimes doubt the truth to their words, but here we are a month later and I can hardly believe you are here and you are ours! You have started taking more notice in things and turn your head to look at people and follow sounds! You have quite the pair of lungs on you, so I am sure you will be a capable singer and speaker! I cannot wait for all the new firsts you're going to have this year, although my sister, your Auntie Lou warns me that when you start to crawl it is only a matter of time before you're running and not to wish away the easy baby parts. Not that I think this is easy, but I think you are worth all the worry in the world! My heart is most at ease when it is just the two of us in the night, with you being so sweet and holding onto my finger and snuggling close. I live for those moments!

Although perhaps we could have a few less of them or at least a couple of hours in between! I adore you, but I am so tired.

Written By Sabella

Nov. 7, 2018, 1:37 p.m.(12/13/1009 AR)

Relationship Note on Lore

There must be something pleasant about the kingdoms of Eurus, for all the people I've met from there have been utterly delightful! While I have heard strange tales, there is surely something redeeming about the place for it brought my sister her wonderful husband and I know there are others that have come to Arx from there who are generous and kind people. So, while on the surface it may seem a strange place to those of us who were not born there, I think there must be hidden depths to it that are fantastic and inspiring to produce such lovely people.

Written By Sabella

Nov. 4, 2018, 1:47 p.m.(12/7/1009 AR)

Relationship Note on Niklas

We have not had as much time to ourselves as we thought we might, despite Elizabetta and Lily taking the Lion's share of baby duty, but I am so grateful to have you as my partner in this new great adventure. I watched you last night as you walked about the room telling her amazing stories using words she couldn't possibly understand yet, but you still softened the danger and twisted the end to be something happy instead of sad as if she could follow along. Your tone was so soft, every look, movement, and word so full of love and devotion for the small bundle you held in your arms. I know I was supposed to be tending to my own affairs, granted a sort reprieve from feeding and bouncing and entertaining, but I was so captivated by how astonished and amazed you seemed to be with every little thing she did. How proud you were when she fell asleep in your arms by the window. And I laughed at how quickly you then fell asleep in your seat still cradling her, your cheek to her forehead. I wish that I could paint it was such a sweet scene.

I think I can no longer say that you will be a great father. You ARE a great father.

Written By Sabella

Nov. 3, 2018, 12:03 p.m.(12/5/1009 AR)

We are getting some moments to ourselves although I am still loathe to leave Relara for long. We had a lovely walk and picnic in the park as a family and actually took some time alone to head to the Lyceum masq, which was a lot of fun! I'm still not exactly sure what sort of sinning the other people at our table were expecting to happen, but I indulged in a lot more cake than I otherwise might have, so I feel like I indulged in enough passion for one night!

Written By Sabella

Nov. 3, 2018, 11:27 a.m.(12/5/1009 AR)

I never knew a person could be so exhausted. I regret that I never tired of eating cakes when I was pregnant, for this baby never tires of eating now and it is so draining! But her cheeks are so adorably round and I swear she smiles at me when she's held close and she looks around at the world with such amazement and wonder already! Elizabetta says she is an old soul, but I see so much newness in her. All these little new movements she makes, holding her head up already!

I am constantly delighted by her and the new depths of love she has introduced me to!

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