Nov. 13, 2017, 7:18 p.m.(7/28/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on
Cristoph
I will happily (and cheekily) rely on the evidence of Aeryn's birth to prove the validity of my marital accords with Kael. As for my desire to hurl books at him, it has less to do with irritation with my husband, for in truth I think I can count on one hand the number of times I've been genuinely wroth with him (the last time being when he spoke ill of himself and I threatened to kick him in the shins if he persisted), and more in my desire to help him in his agility. I am nothing if not dedicated to the achievements of my Lord Husband.
Nov. 13, 2017, 3:40 p.m.(7/28/1007 AR)
...I am no longer with child! I can start training again! I can hit things with large sticks! YES!
Nov. 13, 2017, 11:28 a.m.(7/28/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on
Kael
Don thy armor husband and meet me in the Reading Garden. I have a mind to see how well several tomes do against Rubicund.
Nov. 12, 2017, 5:06 p.m.(7/26/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on
Shard
I thank you very much for your words. It is a rare thing for me to feel so utterly ignorant, but in this case I am, and your shared wisdom is most welcome.
My main concern for her is that she grows knowing that she is loved, and I agree, that I should always be honest with her. Love is does not stop with blood, and I will ensure that she never doubts that she has a place in my heart, no matter the circumstance of her birth.
Thank you, Goodwoman Shard.
Nov. 12, 2017, 11:45 a.m.(7/26/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on
Edain
I wanted to express how grateful I am to be within this man's fealty. His Grace, Prince Edain regularly inspires me. He is kind hearted and tireless in his service to his people. He has several times reached out to me to make sure that I am well and happy and untroubled, though I am a Countess and he a Prince and High Lord. He is not alone in that -- I count among my dearest friends a Duke, several Princesses and a Prince or three and I think... how is it that a child of an impoverished Lord and Lady from the backwaters of Wyrmguard has found herself in this position? It is because Prince Edain fosters a spirit of family within the fealty. His grace and kindness, his inclusiveness is something that begins at the top and shines down to others. I am so grateful to call him liege and I feel blessed to know him and his family.
Nov. 12, 2017, 11:39 a.m.(7/26/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on
Bianca
Cousin, your pen brought a knot to my throat and mist to my eyes. Thank you. Thank you for sharing that story. It is so clear why you were chosen as Archscholar as you exemplify the wisdom of Vellichor. Knowledge shared, especially the hard truths that are carved into us by pain... it is a blessed thing to share. And I for one am grateful to have read it.
Nov. 12, 2017, 11:33 a.m.(7/26/1007 AR)
I have to say I genuinely prefer this whole having the baby in the world rather than within me. Not to say there was no magic in the carrying, but I am having many moments that remind me just how difficult those last few months were. The body and mind are remarkable in so many ways, not the least of which is in how quickly the not-normal can become normal. For instance, in the last month of carrying Squall those familiar with me might recall that my belly was rather large. I have caught myself attempting to hug someone as if it still were, with a pivot and lean in. And then I realize how silly I look. Or the distance from which I stand when filling my plate from the buffet. For all of the oddities and the habits I must relearn... everything, everything is worth it. Our little Lord of Storms is, to this mother's eyes, perfect from head to toe.
It is... *the word difficult has been crossed out and replaced with* challenging, some times. There are three infants in my house right now. Squall, of course, at less than two weeks, Kata who Eliza -- our nurse -- and I estimate to be eight months old and Eliza's son, Orrin who is eleven months old. It is, in a way, like looking into Squall's future. Seeing the milestones ahead. But the challenge is in managing my heart. How do I watch these precious children, Kata, especially, and not form a familial bond with them? When we found Kata she was so thin and ill I worried we might lose her. Before Princess Alis sent her nurse over until we could find Eliza I had to feed Kata myself. And there was a connection born in that act that I cannot shake. Kael and I have discussed things and while, logically I know his vision is right, that it is in no way appropriate for me to cling to a mother's role in Kata's life -- in truth the thought of her calling me mother is unsettling in a way. I feel it dishonors her actual mother who died -- I cannot help but have these occasional flickers of that sentiment. How can I not? She is a charming, sweet soul and I am responsible for her.
I think often of the difficulties that she faces. To be raised in a home and to be family, but not. To have these invisible divisions that keep her other. I fear deeply that I will harm her somehow. Will she resent us for the fact that when she is older she will not be ennobled? That she will be in all senses, a sister to Squall and yet he will be Lord and she not Lady? I struggle with this often, and I do not know what is best. Would it be kinder to send her to Oakhaven to grow away from Arx? But if I do that, how can I be certain she grows knowing that she is loved? A stupid question logically. There are ways, but the heart, I find is not often a logical organ.
If any eyes reading this has the desire to offer their opinion I shall ask my fellow scholars to point me to their whites.
Nov. 12, 2017, 11:05 a.m.(7/26/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on
Zerric
I met a fellow Scholar the other day and his love of the written word delights me to no end. it is so delightful to find in another the same passion that drives you. We have plans to go to the Great Archives and I cannot wait to see his face the first time he looks upon that spectacular ink-laden vista. The knowledge held within those walls is truly a spiritual thing. He also is patroned, it would seem, by the delightful Princess Valencia Velenosa who is inspired to start her own library. Marvelous and well met, Zerric Memphit!
Nov. 8, 2017, 12:18 a.m.(7/17/1007 AR)
He is finally here! My baby boy has joined us in this world. Aeryn Squall Keaton has been born. As soon as he was fed, and we both rested I introduced him to both Vellichor and Limerance. I had Marie create a natural dye and I wrote, 'I am born of love, my first breath a promise fulfilled.' Writing, a sacred thing, recording the history of his creation. He is my vow made flesh. I am so in love right now. I look at him and he embodies all the love and hope I feel when I look at Kael. Our union was made for politics, we were strangers when we met. And yet, Limerance has smiled at us, and our hearts found in one another a love neither expected.
Here is to the future. Aeryn's future. My darling Squall, the Keaton Storm.
Nov. 5, 2017, 10:48 p.m.(7/13/1007 AR)
This week has been filled with so many ups and downs. I have spent time with my sister Eleanor for the first time in years. I have had a chance to speak and spend time with my husband. I went to my very first masquerade and was put in the pool. It was... incredible. And I am so, so, so ready for Squall to be here.
Nov. 5, 2017, 10:39 p.m.(7/13/1007 AR)
I am furious. Absolutely, positively furious and I cannot express the depths of my rage. I had no idea how naive I have been. Never again.
Oct. 26, 2017, 10:49 p.m.(6/21/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on
Derovai
Goodman Voss,
No apologies are necessary, I believe you perceived a critique where none originally existed. Now, however, I must chide your choice of words, your implication that thoughtful discussion on the nature of our gods is merely ethereal. You speak (in my inferrance, naturally) as though contemplation and understanding of our Faith is not relevant to our daily lives. That it is not as important as other matters, or has no bearing on our choices. This is false.
You also seem to be implying that as a noble my time is idle, rather than busy with more pressing matters. This again, is very false. Though I note you did at least, include the possibility of being wrong.
I do not ask you to bow to me or my wisdom, but I do think you should consider, or reconsider, the importance of the gods in your daily life. Their wisdom should guide us all. Your wit and humor are yours to point in whatever direction you wish. Those unable to handle disagreement or challenge are often those who are insecure in their beliefs. Not always, but in my experience I have seen this frequently.
Regardless. I would hope that you consider my words, idle and ethereal though they may be.
Oct. 26, 2017, 8:52 p.m.(6/21/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on
Derovai
The gods all watch over us, Goodman Voss. That is what Brother Driskell was speaking of. The Thirteenth God, He of Reflections. Granted he does not get as much overt worship in the Oathlands as he seems to garner in the Lyceum, but he was confirmed into the Pantheon and he has a place on most altars. He is an uncomfortable god for some, but his eyes, like all gods are on us. We are their instruments and our feet walk the paths they set before us.
Oct. 26, 2017, 6:47 p.m.(6/20/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on
Katarina
Princess Katarina, you are always welcome in Keaton Hall. I look forward to you meeting your namesake. She, like you, always makes me smile and I do believe she will grow to be full of charm, just like you.
Oct. 26, 2017, 3:56 p.m.(6/20/1007 AR)
It is amazing to watch Kata grow. I wish I knew how old she is, or what her birthday was. Eliza, the wet nurse I found for Kata, and I agree that she is likely six or seven months old, despite her petite size. She has been trying to crawl, pushing herself up on those still skinny little arms. She has not succeeded yet, but she likely will, soon enough. I see how much she's grown in the time we've had her and I can just picture what it will be like when Squall is finally here.
In other news, Kael has invited my sister Eleanor to come visit and stay with us through the birth of Squall. I admit, I a little nervous. Eleanor is likely the sister I am closest to, but I have not seen her in quite a long time. Eleanor is quite different than I am, but we always got on well enough. Of anyone, she reminds me of Lady Tessa Moore. I tremble to think of the hijinxs the pair of them would unleash upon the city of Arx.
Oct. 21, 2017, 12:46 p.m.(6/10/1007 AR)
Soon. Soon now. Each day brings the arrival closer, and soon I will feel like myself again. Not that I do not feel myself now, it is simply these are the hard months, when my entire body aches and I feel my skin is too tight and I cannot sleep for the worry running in my veins like cold silver. It feels at times the only emotion I feel these days is worry. I try to push it away, I sing my prayers and I spend time in the reading garden and I try to focus on the tasks before me, but then the fear comes. I have seen births and at the time I was focused on the mother, on helping her through, but when I am in the role of healer, emotions fall away and the moments are the focus, I think of my training and the steps that will come next and I focus there on each step. But this time... I feel like a child with a hundred silly questions to which I know the answer. Will it hurt? Of course it will. Will I die? I certainly hope not. Kael will be with me, and for that I feel a wealth of gratitude.
Soon now.
Oct. 16, 2017, 7:30 p.m.(5/28/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on
Alis
You fill me with a sense of glee, dear Princess Alis. Sometimes, when I find myself blue, I think of something you said and I find myself smiling.
I will see if one of the Keaton leatherworkers might come up with something clever.
Oct. 16, 2017, 7:28 p.m.(5/28/1007 AR)
I have had the most spectacular last few days! The Spring Soiree was breathtaking, the Greenmarchers have a simply incredible Lodge and grounds and Lady Monique and Lord Corban turned it into a delight. I was so sad that I could not participate in the dancing or the games, but just being there lifted my spirits immensely. And the prizes! I am still struck with the fact that Kael won a dragonweep ring, and more so that the man offered it to me. I am willing to claim that I very well may have the grandest, most generous husband ever. (This is not a challenge, but in my eyes Kael is... everything, to me.)
I have been an avid admirer of the parties thrown by Princess Consort Alarissa and Lady Monique, and channeling them, I think I managed to throw a successful fete of my own! Kael's birthday was a large affair, certainly the largest party I've thrown thus far. And the goats appear to be quite popular! I myself have a little terror named Marigold. There are days when I consider a meal of mutton, especially when the little thing has gotten into my sewing. But her face is too charming and she does make me laugh everyday. Plus, she's nearly old enough to start milking and goat cheese is my favorite.
I have to admit though. I'm a little worried about my dear High Lord. Timmons is an uncanny thing and I can't say I liked the way he kept looking at Prince Edain. I am grateful that Princess Caelis has Karri to keep watch over the pair of them.
That is silly, I suppose. What real harm could one tiny goat do?
Oct. 9, 2017, 8:44 p.m.(5/15/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on
Marian
I am so very pleased for you, Princess Marian! That your daughter is here is a blessing for us all, and I am charmed by your poem to announce her arrival. Princess Ellara has the first of her boon companions and I hope it is not too presumptuous to hope that my Squall might be an addition to what will likely be a formidable pair of Princesses.
Welcome Princess Nia of Redrain, there is a whole world of love waiting to embrace you and see you succeed.
Oct. 9, 2017, 2:31 p.m.(5/14/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on
Eirlys
On the subject of family, you, my dear Lady Eirlys Greenmarch, are certainly that to me. Your description of Lady Shae is spot on. She is very much a ray of Sunshine, I have described her that way myself, many a time. Some might think I mean only that she is warm, comforting and can be as sweet as the first rays of sunlight on your face in the Spring. But she is also as fierce as the unrelenting rays, can be as punishing to her foes as a desert heat. She is also as reliable as that great star that rises without fail each dawn to banish the dark.
Lady Shae is a wonder, and a gift. And for more than her presence in our lives, but also in the friends she has brought to Keaton. You, Lady Eirlys, Princess Alis and Prince Fiachra. Marquis Gaston. All of you have become known to us because of Shae and each and every one of you is a blessing.
As to witnessing Squall's birth, well. I shall have to discuss this with Kael and think on it. I am nervous, this I will admit. As the time grows ever nearer, I find that my knowledge of medicines and how things can go so very wrong is a hindrance of sorts. Perhaps having those I feel close to will help ward off those frightening thoughts. I still must see who I can find to be the midwife, there is less time than I think and so very much left to do.