Written By Quenia
May 29, 2021, 11:04 a.m.(7/23/1015 AR)
There are strange things afoot that I wish I could talk about, but can't at the moment. Those things are accompanied by a longing and yearning for a particular thing and dreams which plague me night after night.
I'll be fine. I'll endure. I always do. But there's a certain frustration that accompanies a new puzzle to be solved, that doesn't want to be unlocked.
I did at least get to learn something about myself. There's always something to that; although I'm not sure how I feel about that either, and maybe makes me a bit wary of other things to come.
We shall see what will unfold and what that will mean moving forward.
I'll be fine. I'll endure. I always do. But there's a certain frustration that accompanies a new puzzle to be solved, that doesn't want to be unlocked.
I did at least get to learn something about myself. There's always something to that; although I'm not sure how I feel about that either, and maybe makes me a bit wary of other things to come.
We shall see what will unfold and what that will mean moving forward.
Written By Quenia
May 11, 2021, 4:11 a.m.(6/14/1015 AR)
Random doodles. A vertical rectangle with a circle encased within, with the sides of the circle touching the sides of the rectangle.
It fills the page.
Hm. Scholar? Pardon? What? Oh. Don't mind me. Just something I saw once, somewhere. You don't happen to know what it is do you?
It fills the page.
Hm. Scholar? Pardon? What? Oh. Don't mind me. Just something I saw once, somewhere. You don't happen to know what it is do you?
Written By Quenia
May 11, 2021, 3:50 a.m.(6/14/1015 AR)
Relationship Note on Aleksei
Is there something wrong with not knowing how to swim?
Written By Quenia
March 21, 2021, 9:52 p.m.(2/25/1015 AR)
Tonight I had the pleasure of sharing company with several individuals that I've gotten to know somewhat over the past couple of months, and at least one I've known for several years. The event had a surprise ending, and a glass of sparkling wine that had hints of strawberries.
I do long for warmth of summer, as the swirling snow has hit me in the face for the thousandth time this season.
I do long for warmth of summer, as the swirling snow has hit me in the face for the thousandth time this season.
Written By Quenia
March 20, 2021, 7:17 a.m.(2/22/1015 AR)
Relationship Note on Giulio
Of late, I find myself looking through my notes, of the journeys and accomplishments the Mirrorguard has made. During this time, some two years ago, the Mirrorguard were ranging all over the Lyceum, looking into the threat of House Thornweave after the holding of the Volkov's was destroyed.
The things and people they faced were incredibly dangerous, and I can only commend them for their bravery and their willingness to step in where others might not. They faced the impossible and made difficult decisions.
Among them was Count Giulio Corvini. He and his group, which included my cousin Lady Yelana Igniseri, Lady Esme Fidante, Lady Mabelle Laurent, Ras Al-Katibi, and Lord Vicente Fidante, were able to rescue a young girl and her brother from a village that had been decimated by attackers.
Were it not for their actions, that family may have never been reunited. Worse, the boy they found, a young lad of 18, may have perished where he had been hiding during the assault on his down. It was through their efforts that they were able to discover him trapped in a cellar. They were the only survivors, that they could discover, of that particular assault.
The world is a lesser place without Count Giulio and his influence in it.
The things and people they faced were incredibly dangerous, and I can only commend them for their bravery and their willingness to step in where others might not. They faced the impossible and made difficult decisions.
Among them was Count Giulio Corvini. He and his group, which included my cousin Lady Yelana Igniseri, Lady Esme Fidante, Lady Mabelle Laurent, Ras Al-Katibi, and Lord Vicente Fidante, were able to rescue a young girl and her brother from a village that had been decimated by attackers.
Were it not for their actions, that family may have never been reunited. Worse, the boy they found, a young lad of 18, may have perished where he had been hiding during the assault on his down. It was through their efforts that they were able to discover him trapped in a cellar. They were the only survivors, that they could discover, of that particular assault.
The world is a lesser place without Count Giulio and his influence in it.
Written By Quenia
Feb. 5, 2021, 10:28 p.m.(11/19/1014 AR)
Relationship Note on Amanita
Oh, I quite assure you, there's plenty of mystery left even with what I have revealed.
Written By Quenia
Feb. 5, 2021, 10:26 p.m.(11/19/1014 AR)
Oh, Journal.
I can't believe I did that. Right in the middle of the Arvani League meeting. Why did I do that? Oh why?
I suppose it needed to be done, after years of hiding away in my manse.
I announced that I was seeking a husband, and someone responded that they would work their magic as a matchmaker.
I guess we shall see what comes of it.
Luis will be thrilled, as I had threatened to make him heir several times if something ever happens to me.
I can't believe I did that. Right in the middle of the Arvani League meeting. Why did I do that? Oh why?
I suppose it needed to be done, after years of hiding away in my manse.
I announced that I was seeking a husband, and someone responded that they would work their magic as a matchmaker.
I guess we shall see what comes of it.
Luis will be thrilled, as I had threatened to make him heir several times if something ever happens to me.
Written By Quenia
Feb. 3, 2021, 9:40 p.m.(11/15/1014 AR)
Relationship Note on Orland
It is only quite by happenstance that I wondered onto Lord Orland's most recent journal entry. I do not know why, maybe because of the things I alluded to in my last post, but it caught my eye. So, I endeavor to answer his questions, since I, too, seem to be restless of late.
1. What are you afraid of?
Failing my brother, Vincere, in his choice to have me become the new leader of House Igniseri after his passing. Failing my family. Failing to protect Granato. Not knowing enough about the world and the dark things that linger within it that might do them harm, and not being prepared enough to handle whatever may come. Of not being able to look ahead and see what might wish to harm us most, and put them out of harm's way. Not being able to shake the shadow that lingers, or those things that take flight within the night. That nightmares may come true.
I could go on, likely, but those are the things that first come to mind.
2. What are your opinions on honor?
I believe a person's word is their bond. If you cannot rely on that, then what can you rely on? Vows and oaths should never be taken lightly. If someone breaks their word, how can you ever trust them, or anything they say again, or say they'll do? There has to be a fundamental trust somewhere, or it all falls apart.
But it's not just about your word. Your deeds and actions matter too. There are some lines that should never be crossed; the examples of which could be numerous.
3. What path do you see for yourself?
There are too many possibilities to count, and probably even more than I could ever possibly dream. I rather like to keep my options open, so as not to bound to one particular path, for one may never know what choices they are faced with, especially during times of uncertainty. But if I had to choose something, I suppose it would be the one that would allow me to give aid to the most people possible, to help better their lives and those of the people around them and lift them up, rather than break them down. To ensure they had the freedom to choose their own fate, lest they be bound to those who might do them disservice or attempt to break them down for their own purpose.
4. You can give one piece of advice who really needs advice to live by...what do you tell them.
Always look forward to the next thing, for if you keep looking back you'll get stuck in your own shadow and be left behind while others move forward around you.
1. What are you afraid of?
Failing my brother, Vincere, in his choice to have me become the new leader of House Igniseri after his passing. Failing my family. Failing to protect Granato. Not knowing enough about the world and the dark things that linger within it that might do them harm, and not being prepared enough to handle whatever may come. Of not being able to look ahead and see what might wish to harm us most, and put them out of harm's way. Not being able to shake the shadow that lingers, or those things that take flight within the night. That nightmares may come true.
I could go on, likely, but those are the things that first come to mind.
2. What are your opinions on honor?
I believe a person's word is their bond. If you cannot rely on that, then what can you rely on? Vows and oaths should never be taken lightly. If someone breaks their word, how can you ever trust them, or anything they say again, or say they'll do? There has to be a fundamental trust somewhere, or it all falls apart.
But it's not just about your word. Your deeds and actions matter too. There are some lines that should never be crossed; the examples of which could be numerous.
3. What path do you see for yourself?
There are too many possibilities to count, and probably even more than I could ever possibly dream. I rather like to keep my options open, so as not to bound to one particular path, for one may never know what choices they are faced with, especially during times of uncertainty. But if I had to choose something, I suppose it would be the one that would allow me to give aid to the most people possible, to help better their lives and those of the people around them and lift them up, rather than break them down. To ensure they had the freedom to choose their own fate, lest they be bound to those who might do them disservice or attempt to break them down for their own purpose.
4. You can give one piece of advice who really needs advice to live by...what do you tell them.
Always look forward to the next thing, for if you keep looking back you'll get stuck in your own shadow and be left behind while others move forward around you.
Written By Quenia
Feb. 3, 2021, 2:26 p.m.(11/14/1014 AR)
Oh Journal.
There are some days that I dream and wonder about what I wouldn't give to have my former life back. To have the freedom to travel and go where I was wont to go, and just bask in the glory of it. Where I'd flirt with potential suitors with nothing but the promise of here and now, and not have to look forward to what comes tomorrow.
There is a heaviness that has fallen upon me that I do not know how to shake, and a darkness that follows after me. I long for the times where there was naught but light and open-heartedness.
Yet, I know I will persevere and I will strive to push forward, in spite of it all.
Perhaps it is an adventure that I crave? A yearning to get away from it all?
Or, perhaps it is fear that drives how I presently feel? I cannot say for certain.
Just that I long to get away from it all, even if just for a short while.
A respite.
There are some days that I dream and wonder about what I wouldn't give to have my former life back. To have the freedom to travel and go where I was wont to go, and just bask in the glory of it. Where I'd flirt with potential suitors with nothing but the promise of here and now, and not have to look forward to what comes tomorrow.
There is a heaviness that has fallen upon me that I do not know how to shake, and a darkness that follows after me. I long for the times where there was naught but light and open-heartedness.
Yet, I know I will persevere and I will strive to push forward, in spite of it all.
Perhaps it is an adventure that I crave? A yearning to get away from it all?
Or, perhaps it is fear that drives how I presently feel? I cannot say for certain.
Just that I long to get away from it all, even if just for a short while.
A respite.
Written By Quenia
Nov. 6, 2020, 2:15 a.m.(5/3/1014 AR)
The Eclipse of Mirrors masquerade was certainly an eventful evening. I had, by chance, gotten to see a reflection in one of the mirrors that has . . . alarmed me quite a bit. I'm not quite certain how to feel about it or how much validity I should put into vision I saw. It had some disturbing elements to it that struck a chord all too close to home.
There have been many a sleepless nights since.
There have been many a sleepless nights since.
Written By Quenia
Aug. 10, 2020, 2:39 p.m.(10/24/1013 AR)
For several months now I've been having recurring dreams of a darkness flowing from Arx in a sprawling mass, swallowing everything it touches as it gets bigger and bigger. There are other such dreams as well that haunt me in the night. Each time I wake up, I'm always left gasping for air as I try to think of ways of stopping it.
I've talked to a few people about them, trying to shrug them off after the first time I had them. But there's something, deep down, that bugs me about them. I can't quite put my finger on it. Why? Why these dreams? And why do I wake with a start each time, knowing that its only a dream?
I suspect it's because of the troubles we'd been facing in Granato. Or maybe it's the recent attacks that have happened in the city? I can't be certain. But they're just dreams and nothing to worry about, right?
I've talked to a few people about them, trying to shrug them off after the first time I had them. But there's something, deep down, that bugs me about them. I can't quite put my finger on it. Why? Why these dreams? And why do I wake with a start each time, knowing that its only a dream?
I suspect it's because of the troubles we'd been facing in Granato. Or maybe it's the recent attacks that have happened in the city? I can't be certain. But they're just dreams and nothing to worry about, right?
Written By Quenia
June 12, 2020, 7:57 a.m.(6/17/1013 AR)
I have embarked on a new path of research. It's a bit scary and kind of exciting at the same time. I suspect I already know the answer to the questions I seek, but the possibilities are there, it opens up new prospects for me, perhaps. But, then again, maybe not.
That's the thing about research - the uncertainty if you can ever truly find answers to the questions you seek.
That's the thing about research - the uncertainty if you can ever truly find answers to the questions you seek.
Written By Quenia
May 21, 2020, 11:06 p.m.(5/3/1013 AR)
Oh. Gosh. I've been so wrapped up in events surrounding my city that I've only just noticed that my birthday was yesterday. Another year. It's hard to believe I've been in Arx for so long, much less that I've grown older while I've been here. Yet, it seems bittersweet. It used to be a day I'd share with my brothers, one way or another, no matter what I was doing or where I would be fostered.
I often wonder if they've been reincarnated yet. If they were able to stay together as the twins that they are. What their life might be like now, if they have been. I do miss them so very, very much. They would have played a prank on the morning of my birthday, something to make me smile in the early morning hours. Especially now, when this year when I hadn't had so much to smile about in the past year.
I shall have to plan a special treat for myself. To celebrate.
I often wonder if they've been reincarnated yet. If they were able to stay together as the twins that they are. What their life might be like now, if they have been. I do miss them so very, very much. They would have played a prank on the morning of my birthday, something to make me smile in the early morning hours. Especially now, when this year when I hadn't had so much to smile about in the past year.
I shall have to plan a special treat for myself. To celebrate.
Written By Quenia
May 21, 2020, 11:01 p.m.(5/3/1013 AR)
There's something about organizing a group of people to work toward a task that feels. . . . freeing. I think I was able to give people projects to work on, or at least I hope I was able. Things that would both be interesting and illuminating. I suppose we shall see, in time, whether the roots of the meeting bears any fruit.
Written By Quenia
April 22, 2020, 8:48 a.m.(2/27/1013 AR)
Relationship Note on Lucita
If only you knew the truth of it all, Cousin.
Written By Quenia
April 22, 2020, 8:46 a.m.(2/27/1013 AR)
Thanks are offered to the individual who gifted me with an unusual bit of information. Knowledge, no matter when it is given, is always a wonderful gift. I shall cherish it and hold it dearly, and take it for what it is.
Written By Quenia
April 7, 2020, 7:47 a.m.(1/25/1013 AR)
Relationship Note on Olivando
I have noticed from the Whites that my cousin Olivando has started to get settled into the city again. This reminds me that I should start writing more in the Whites, or even the Blacks, lest he chide me for not doing my duty to Vellichor. I shall have to endeavor to write more often, even for the edgier topics. This is what the Blacks are for, after all.
Written By Quenia
March 27, 2020, 6:24 a.m.(1/3/1013 AR)
I have decided to embrace this winter. Do not be surprised if a random snowball flies your way. Yes. Your way. Whoever you are reading my white journal. Everyone, and I do mean everyone, is a target. You are forewarned.
Written By Quenia
March 24, 2020, 6:53 p.m.(12/26/1012 AR)
I said I would help a dear friend, but these days it seems I'm having trouble sleeping.
Written By Quenia
March 22, 2020, 5:48 p.m.(12/22/1012 AR)
Relationship Note on Porter
All I can say is how can House Igniseri help get Ian back? He's done so much for us and we're not just going to stand around and wring our hands.
Please note that the scholars may take some time preparing your journal for others to read.