Written By Reigna
April 16, 2018, 11:14 a.m.(7/23/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Saoirse
Wait... is one who speaks in the name of the Crown making a public statement that House Valardin has infiltrated and is spying on House Grayson?
Written By Reigna
April 14, 2018, 10:09 a.m.(7/19/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Shard
I always find you to be insightful and I appreciate the fact that you often share your perspective. Intellectually I believe I understand what you are saying. It still makes me sad. But that is my emotion and no one else is responsible for that.
The reason I reached out to goodman Bastien was not to try to gain in popularity. I simply sought advice on ways to ensure that the clinic was a place folk would feel safe and comfortable going to. So that my ignorance did not negatively impact those that need the help.
What I have learned from this is there is nothing I can do in the face of those who will hate or be angry but endure it and serve them with the same grace and care we would anyone else. Because when it comes to medicine, everyone IS the same. Whether commoner or king, we all bleed red, we all get sick.
The reason I reached out to goodman Bastien was not to try to gain in popularity. I simply sought advice on ways to ensure that the clinic was a place folk would feel safe and comfortable going to. So that my ignorance did not negatively impact those that need the help.
What I have learned from this is there is nothing I can do in the face of those who will hate or be angry but endure it and serve them with the same grace and care we would anyone else. Because when it comes to medicine, everyone IS the same. Whether commoner or king, we all bleed red, we all get sick.
Written By Reigna
April 14, 2018, 12:21 a.m.(7/18/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Margret
Thank you Margret. Your words were perfect. And with that, I clearly need someone to take my quill away.
Written By Reigna
April 13, 2018, 11:56 p.m.(7/18/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Itzal
You are too right, I should have been clearer. That last part was more directed to Goodman Bastien, as he was the one to directly encourage hate be directed to our physicians.
Written By Reigna
April 13, 2018, 11:46 p.m.(7/18/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Orathy
I think my actions speak for my desire to do right by the Commons. I think I've been respectful and inviting to those who I deal with (with a few notable exceptions) and when I am proven wrong, I own up to it and apologize. I fail to understand why the desire to understand the perspectives of others is met with such recrimination and vitriol. You make sweeping statements that lump everyone born to the Peerage into a single category and tar us with the same brush. I cannot speak for the intentions of others, but I have always sought what is best for the greater good. It is a guiding principal of my life and one of the main motivations for me to become a healer. I do not pick and choose my patients. I serve all in need.
As to those who desire people of the commons to hate all 'silks' including those who are attempting to staff a clinic to serve them? How can you be filled with so much hate for people you do not know?
That makes me incredibly sad.
As to those who desire people of the commons to hate all 'silks' including those who are attempting to staff a clinic to serve them? How can you be filled with so much hate for people you do not know?
That makes me incredibly sad.
Written By Reigna
April 13, 2018, 8:50 p.m.(7/18/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Talen
I can get you a tea for that, Your Grace?
...was that funny? I was trying to be funny.
For the record, I do not hate High Lord Victus, and was sincere in my apology to him.
...was that funny? I was trying to be funny.
For the record, I do not hate High Lord Victus, and was sincere in my apology to him.
Written By Reigna
April 13, 2018, 7:37 p.m.(7/18/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Victus
Well I *did* say I was being cranky.
You are correct, that my words did imply those things were not being done, and for the offense my words caused, I am truly apologetic. I am glad to hear that Thrax is seeing to the families of the fallen, and I should have expected no less from a Great House. I know that Keaton is working as hard as we can to handle our losses, and how difficult that is for us.
I can often take things too seriously, and in the examples that you gave, yes. I can see the reasoning behind your choice. I simply... I feel as if all I can see lately is those in need, those I feel a deep obligation to help.
Do you perhaps know of anyone available to tutor me in how to have a sense of humor?
You are correct, that my words did imply those things were not being done, and for the offense my words caused, I am truly apologetic. I am glad to hear that Thrax is seeing to the families of the fallen, and I should have expected no less from a Great House. I know that Keaton is working as hard as we can to handle our losses, and how difficult that is for us.
I can often take things too seriously, and in the examples that you gave, yes. I can see the reasoning behind your choice. I simply... I feel as if all I can see lately is those in need, those I feel a deep obligation to help.
Do you perhaps know of anyone available to tutor me in how to have a sense of humor?
Written By Reigna
April 13, 2018, 7:06 p.m.(7/18/1008 AR)
I admit fully at the start of this entry I am having a particularly difficult day today, I feel most beset and under seige by my body and it has put me in a prickly mood.
That being said, to the many coming to the defense of the Claw of Arx... yes, it is a good thing that this was not a Knighting. It does spare a great many Knights a measure of indignity, and for that I am grateful. To the others saying it was all in good fun and should be taken as a moment of levity? ...Is it though? 20 silver a week is almost three times the income of an average serf that works in our fields and mines and orchards and groves.
I understand, on an intellectual level that this is likely me being an insufferable snot, not accepting the joke and being altogether too serious. But there are so many suffering. So many struggling in the wake of the loss of a husband, sister, mother, brother, child. Families struggling to recover from the loss of a loved one AND the salary they provided. It may seem like a pittance to some. But it is absolutely necessary to the great majority of those who lost their lives. Would not that boon have been better served in compensating or setting up a trust for those families? Surely this could not be grumbled about and would likely cause less furor given it is a selfless act. Not as funny, perhaps, but a selfless and good thing.
Perhaps I am simply a pregnant, cranky Oathlands Lady with no sense of humor. I just know that had I a boon from the King I would use it in the service of my people, rather than an irascible feline who could not care less.
That being said, to the many coming to the defense of the Claw of Arx... yes, it is a good thing that this was not a Knighting. It does spare a great many Knights a measure of indignity, and for that I am grateful. To the others saying it was all in good fun and should be taken as a moment of levity? ...Is it though? 20 silver a week is almost three times the income of an average serf that works in our fields and mines and orchards and groves.
I understand, on an intellectual level that this is likely me being an insufferable snot, not accepting the joke and being altogether too serious. But there are so many suffering. So many struggling in the wake of the loss of a husband, sister, mother, brother, child. Families struggling to recover from the loss of a loved one AND the salary they provided. It may seem like a pittance to some. But it is absolutely necessary to the great majority of those who lost their lives. Would not that boon have been better served in compensating or setting up a trust for those families? Surely this could not be grumbled about and would likely cause less furor given it is a selfless act. Not as funny, perhaps, but a selfless and good thing.
Perhaps I am simply a pregnant, cranky Oathlands Lady with no sense of humor. I just know that had I a boon from the King I would use it in the service of my people, rather than an irascible feline who could not care less.
Written By Reigna
April 13, 2018, 12:46 p.m.(7/17/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Aureth
Thank you.
Written By Reigna
April 13, 2018, 12:19 p.m.(7/17/1008 AR)
So, we are granting status to pets now? Untrained and violent ones as well. That is quite interesting, and I am sure rather despiriting to those souls who spent years of toil and training to attain that status, rather than survive a shipwreck out of necessity, being too violent and stubborn to be saved.
Also of note is the fact that in order to be able to lodge complaint or differing opinion, one must be able to best a High Lord in personal combat, during a tournament with some of the fiercest warriors in the Compact. Sorry to all of those whose skills lie elsewhere. Apparently because we cannot wield a weapon our voices do not matter.
Also of note is the fact that in order to be able to lodge complaint or differing opinion, one must be able to best a High Lord in personal combat, during a tournament with some of the fiercest warriors in the Compact. Sorry to all of those whose skills lie elsewhere. Apparently because we cannot wield a weapon our voices do not matter.
Written By Reigna
April 12, 2018, 7:13 p.m.(7/16/1008 AR)
I reached out today, trying to get some information to ensure that efforts being made are not undone by ignorance on my part. I was met with... It was not that the words cut. It was brusque, yes, but... Perhaps it is my problem. That I hear with ears that sense dismissal where none was intended. It is a difficult thing, to try to understand someone else's point of view. I try. I try to apologize in advance, to acknowledge that I am ignorant. To invite others to educate me. Because that is how I would like to be approached by someone who is uncertain and clearly not wanting to offend. It is hard for me to imagine being... again, they were not hostile, but... intractable maybe? Yes, I suppose that might be the best word for it. But I have to remember that not everyone is as willing to trust the intentions of others. It saddens me, but I suppose one might attribute that to the very privilege I am aware I am afforded.
There is a philosophy that I adhere to, that, after the discussions I prompted in these Whites, I think many seem to understand. I am interested to see if anyone disagrees with it.
The concept is servant leadership. The idea being that a leader is someone who serves their people. They are beholden to those they lead, responsible for their continued success, because if we succeed in helping them succeed, then by extension, everyone succeeds.
Counter thoughts?
There is a philosophy that I adhere to, that, after the discussions I prompted in these Whites, I think many seem to understand. I am interested to see if anyone disagrees with it.
The concept is servant leadership. The idea being that a leader is someone who serves their people. They are beholden to those they lead, responsible for their continued success, because if we succeed in helping them succeed, then by extension, everyone succeeds.
Counter thoughts?
Written By Reigna
April 12, 2018, 12:41 p.m.(7/15/1008 AR)
I am so very much looking forward to the Keaton Summer Celebration that is coming up! I have already begun tackling the gifts and prizes to be given out to those that attend. I am most looking forward to the children's portion at the earlier part of the day and invite all those with little ones to bring their children! I have employed a number of artists to capture drawings of the event that can be used to create portraits at a later date. More will have safe pigments for the children to play with, so they can create art of their own (smocks provided). And there will puppies and goat kids aplenty for them to play with. We have a number of games prepared and lots of sweets for them to enjoy.
Once the children are tuckered out, it will be time for the adults to relax and enjoy the summer evening. All are invited to come and mingle, enjoy Marie's exquisite cuisine, a sampling of alcoholic beverages dreamed into creation by the ever creative Count Kael Keaton, and, of course, partake in games and wagers. There will be games to play, music to dance to, and a raffle as well!
Once the children are tuckered out, it will be time for the adults to relax and enjoy the summer evening. All are invited to come and mingle, enjoy Marie's exquisite cuisine, a sampling of alcoholic beverages dreamed into creation by the ever creative Count Kael Keaton, and, of course, partake in games and wagers. There will be games to play, music to dance to, and a raffle as well!
Written By Reigna
April 11, 2018, 4:27 p.m.(7/13/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Veronica
I... see. He is getting more steady in his walking. He does have a well chewed sword toy. My suggestion would be to speak to Kael about his training, as I am useless when it comes to weaponry of all kinds, as well you know. If you would like to get him a lance, I would be amenable, so long as it is cushioned and covered in felt. I was wanting to ask Kael to make Aeryn a wooden horse with curved wooden rocking feet. Or possibly wheels.
Written By Reigna
April 11, 2018, 3:09 p.m.(7/13/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Veronica
You are doing what with my child now?
Written By Reigna
April 7, 2018, 5:27 p.m.(7/6/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Bastien
Do you not think that is an all too simplistic answer? That nobles do not earn anything or die?
I am not trying to be nettling, I am trying to understand your perspective.
I am not trying to be nettling, I am trying to understand your perspective.
Written By Reigna
April 7, 2018, 5:26 p.m.(7/6/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Esoka
I think I understand the words you write. You feel as though you must always be on guard, lest what you have earned is taken from you by those you might anger with your opinion? You feel muzzled and not free to speak your truth for fear that the consequences will take what you have earned?
You are correct, I do not know, which is why I asked. I suppose it was ignorant of me not to consider that answering that question might cause problems. You have my apologies for that, Dame Esoka. And my gratitude for the answer you gave.
You are correct, I do not know, which is why I asked. I suppose it was ignorant of me not to consider that answering that question might cause problems. You have my apologies for that, Dame Esoka. And my gratitude for the answer you gave.
Written By Reigna
April 7, 2018, 2:02 p.m.(7/5/1008 AR)
As I have been called to answer my own questions, I shall. Though your jibes do not go unnoticed, Voss.
What does it mean to be noble? The thing about this question is, I can only answer for myself. I can observe what I see in others, but I cannot know their minds unless they tell me. My knowledge of them is surface deep. I can answer only what I see and hear and assume. That is why I asked it. I wanted to see what other people feel and believe.
For me, my answers align closely to Duke Cassius. Nobility is about service. It is about understanding that your choices, your words, your actions are not solely your own. This is not to say I'm painting some picture of martyred nobility in chains. No. Skald tells us that we all have a choice -- but those choices are forever tied to consequences. So when I say it is about service, that is what the soul of nobility is. It is the *choice* made to sublimate all that you are into *who* you are. Who your family needs you to be. Your words, your actions, your inactions all reflect upon the greater organism that if your Family. That family extends out like tendrils of a vine, to your lieges and vassals, and most of all, above all else (for those of us who have lands to manage) the people who live within your demesne. Those are the lives that are most vulnerable. Most precious. Without their labor, without their lives, where does the food come from? The cloth, the leather, the ore, the day to day items that make life essential? It is their sweat that drives our economies. Our lives are to be a service to them. To ensure they have all the things they need to continue. Food to eat so they stay strong. So their families are happy and healthy. Security and safety in the form of guards and soldiers to protect them from Shav'Arvani raids and predation from animals. Without them nobility has no purpose. They do not live to serve us. We live to serve them. We are educated, we are clothed, we are afforded the trappings of power to better serve the people we are sworn to protect. We surrender ourselves to the betterment of our Houses. We give up the right to choose who we marry, though of late it seems to have become very in fashion to marry for love over duty. I cannot speak to that, beyond noting it. This is what I believe nobles *should* be. It is what I strive for in myself.
What does it mean to be a commoner? In this I can only theorize. I am not a commoner. But I imagine that their lives are also about service. Service to their families. Without being afforded the wealth that typically comes with bearing the name of a House of the Peerage, one must rely on those very people to ensure that the days work gets done. That your labors are enough to make do and ensure food is available, housing is secured. I imagine there is uncertainty and stress in not being able to know the people who make the rules. Really know them. To have to trust someone who seems so very different from you. Whose words and actions seem... unclear.
How does living in Arx skew our perspectives? There are a lot of nobles that live within Arx. I feel confident in my estimation in saying there are likely more nobles in Arx than in anywhere else in Arvum. Back where I grew up, on a tiny parcel of land given to my grandmother by her father when he passed away, we had a village of 200 people. There was a small market, a road that led to the next village three days ride away, they had an Inn, it was very fancy, and eventually to Blancbier. In my home I knew every soul there. I knew the names of everyone who lived in Apsfel Falls. I knew the soldiers and the farmers, I knew the fishermen and the tanners. I knew them. And they knew me. Well. Sort of, I was a quiet child. The point is, it was a much closer relationship. They could see how hard we worked to keep them safe. The sacrifices we made in our home for them. Things made sense. The give and take was clearer. The roles were easy to define and the rules we all lived by were simple. In Arx... there is no chance for that organic relationship. There is no obvious give and take between nobles who rule over land so far away and commoners who live within the city. I think it is the sort of situation that breeds a level of misunderstanding and results in mistrust. I think that if we can communicate and try to not assume we understand based on our own emotions or assumptions we might find ourselves building bridges.
What does it mean to be noble? The thing about this question is, I can only answer for myself. I can observe what I see in others, but I cannot know their minds unless they tell me. My knowledge of them is surface deep. I can answer only what I see and hear and assume. That is why I asked it. I wanted to see what other people feel and believe.
For me, my answers align closely to Duke Cassius. Nobility is about service. It is about understanding that your choices, your words, your actions are not solely your own. This is not to say I'm painting some picture of martyred nobility in chains. No. Skald tells us that we all have a choice -- but those choices are forever tied to consequences. So when I say it is about service, that is what the soul of nobility is. It is the *choice* made to sublimate all that you are into *who* you are. Who your family needs you to be. Your words, your actions, your inactions all reflect upon the greater organism that if your Family. That family extends out like tendrils of a vine, to your lieges and vassals, and most of all, above all else (for those of us who have lands to manage) the people who live within your demesne. Those are the lives that are most vulnerable. Most precious. Without their labor, without their lives, where does the food come from? The cloth, the leather, the ore, the day to day items that make life essential? It is their sweat that drives our economies. Our lives are to be a service to them. To ensure they have all the things they need to continue. Food to eat so they stay strong. So their families are happy and healthy. Security and safety in the form of guards and soldiers to protect them from Shav'Arvani raids and predation from animals. Without them nobility has no purpose. They do not live to serve us. We live to serve them. We are educated, we are clothed, we are afforded the trappings of power to better serve the people we are sworn to protect. We surrender ourselves to the betterment of our Houses. We give up the right to choose who we marry, though of late it seems to have become very in fashion to marry for love over duty. I cannot speak to that, beyond noting it. This is what I believe nobles *should* be. It is what I strive for in myself.
What does it mean to be a commoner? In this I can only theorize. I am not a commoner. But I imagine that their lives are also about service. Service to their families. Without being afforded the wealth that typically comes with bearing the name of a House of the Peerage, one must rely on those very people to ensure that the days work gets done. That your labors are enough to make do and ensure food is available, housing is secured. I imagine there is uncertainty and stress in not being able to know the people who make the rules. Really know them. To have to trust someone who seems so very different from you. Whose words and actions seem... unclear.
How does living in Arx skew our perspectives? There are a lot of nobles that live within Arx. I feel confident in my estimation in saying there are likely more nobles in Arx than in anywhere else in Arvum. Back where I grew up, on a tiny parcel of land given to my grandmother by her father when he passed away, we had a village of 200 people. There was a small market, a road that led to the next village three days ride away, they had an Inn, it was very fancy, and eventually to Blancbier. In my home I knew every soul there. I knew the names of everyone who lived in Apsfel Falls. I knew the soldiers and the farmers, I knew the fishermen and the tanners. I knew them. And they knew me. Well. Sort of, I was a quiet child. The point is, it was a much closer relationship. They could see how hard we worked to keep them safe. The sacrifices we made in our home for them. Things made sense. The give and take was clearer. The roles were easy to define and the rules we all lived by were simple. In Arx... there is no chance for that organic relationship. There is no obvious give and take between nobles who rule over land so far away and commoners who live within the city. I think it is the sort of situation that breeds a level of misunderstanding and results in mistrust. I think that if we can communicate and try to not assume we understand based on our own emotions or assumptions we might find ourselves building bridges.
Written By Reigna
April 7, 2018, 11:15 a.m.(7/5/1008 AR)
I put forth these questions and invite all answers to any who might read this:
What does it mean to be a noble?
What does it mean to be a commoner?
Does living in Arx, a large city with an uncommon ratio of nobles to commons skew our perceptions of one another?
What does it mean to be a noble?
What does it mean to be a commoner?
Does living in Arx, a large city with an uncommon ratio of nobles to commons skew our perceptions of one another?
Written By Reigna
April 5, 2018, 1:59 p.m.(7/1/1008 AR)
No matter what happens, no matter what we experience, time marches forward. I must try to remember that. I can get so lost in my thoughts, in my reading and studying. In my medicine, in my joys that I feel almost that I am in a bubble, trapped in those moments. Some blissful, others... less so. But time moves ever onward. There are things that must be done, people to speak with, information to be gathered and shared.
I have been having nightmares. I am getting used to them now. They no longer have me waking with a scream. I do not even wake Kael anymore. Well. Most of the time.
I see those creatures, wasted, emaciated. Hungry. The hollowness of their filmed over eyes, lost beyond the ability to be called men. The leashes wrapped around their throats, their clawing hands and gnashing teeth. I see that tower of armor and the deep basso echoes of 'Feast'.
But that, oddly, is the background. My dreams are filled with wounds. The stench of charred flesh and burnt bone, the slippery feel of entrails sliding through my hands as I try to put someone back together. The way the copper tang of blood filled my mouth for days. The steady, relentless sound of a sword cutting through the necks of the dead and worse, the dying. Each lopping fall of that sword counting another failure. Another life unsaved. So many died. I tried... I tried so hard. I thought ahead, I trained them. I drilled them. I arrogantly thought I was going to make such a difference. I was going to save them.
Only one in four returned. One in four. I have written so many letters to so many families. Thanking them for the service of their kin. Apologizing for the loss, remarking on the bravery and duty they fulfilled when they did not have to. Healers are not soldiers, and many died in service to them. To the Compact.
My mind cannot seem to let this go. It takes me back there at unexpected times. Nothing at all should make me think of it, and suddenly it is as if I am back in that tent, amidst the wails and moans, the thunder of hooves and that terrible terrible call, 'Feast'.
Time marches forward. Things, places, people move on. I travel through Arx and I see so many merry people and a part of me wonders what is wrong with me, that I am home, but I am also still not wholly home. A part of me is still in Stormwall. I do not know if I will ever really leave that place. Why can I not be home? Does anyone else feel this way? As if they left a part of themselves so far away, still stuck in that bubble of terror and focus?
I am not wholly unhappy. Not at all. Being home, seeing my husband, my children, my friends, I am often laughing, often happy. Until I blink and I am back there.
Time marches forward, but I feel left behind.
I have been having nightmares. I am getting used to them now. They no longer have me waking with a scream. I do not even wake Kael anymore. Well. Most of the time.
I see those creatures, wasted, emaciated. Hungry. The hollowness of their filmed over eyes, lost beyond the ability to be called men. The leashes wrapped around their throats, their clawing hands and gnashing teeth. I see that tower of armor and the deep basso echoes of 'Feast'.
But that, oddly, is the background. My dreams are filled with wounds. The stench of charred flesh and burnt bone, the slippery feel of entrails sliding through my hands as I try to put someone back together. The way the copper tang of blood filled my mouth for days. The steady, relentless sound of a sword cutting through the necks of the dead and worse, the dying. Each lopping fall of that sword counting another failure. Another life unsaved. So many died. I tried... I tried so hard. I thought ahead, I trained them. I drilled them. I arrogantly thought I was going to make such a difference. I was going to save them.
Only one in four returned. One in four. I have written so many letters to so many families. Thanking them for the service of their kin. Apologizing for the loss, remarking on the bravery and duty they fulfilled when they did not have to. Healers are not soldiers, and many died in service to them. To the Compact.
My mind cannot seem to let this go. It takes me back there at unexpected times. Nothing at all should make me think of it, and suddenly it is as if I am back in that tent, amidst the wails and moans, the thunder of hooves and that terrible terrible call, 'Feast'.
Time marches forward. Things, places, people move on. I travel through Arx and I see so many merry people and a part of me wonders what is wrong with me, that I am home, but I am also still not wholly home. A part of me is still in Stormwall. I do not know if I will ever really leave that place. Why can I not be home? Does anyone else feel this way? As if they left a part of themselves so far away, still stuck in that bubble of terror and focus?
I am not wholly unhappy. Not at all. Being home, seeing my husband, my children, my friends, I am often laughing, often happy. Until I blink and I am back there.
Time marches forward, but I feel left behind.
Written By Reigna
April 4, 2018, 2:32 p.m.(6/27/1008 AR)
It has been far, far too long since Keaton has thrown a party. As the Summer is almost upon us and the Heir of Keaton is fast approaching his first birthday, I am so happy to announce that another Keaton Party is planned! There will be games and prizes and Marie is doing the cooking. I am so looking forward to it! I might even hire musicians and see if I can't convince my husband to dance with me.
Hello summer!
Hello summer!
Please note that the scholars may take some time preparing your journal for others to read.