Written By Esoka
May 17, 2017, 12:17 a.m.(6/22/1006 AR)
Relationship Note on Zhayla
Zhayla is a joy. A joy who can bash in skulls and clear a battlefield with that big weapon of hers. She's only beginning to make a life for herself in the Compact, and that path is not always an easy one to walk. But I think she'll do very well. She has a great heart, is a great warrior, and will be a great knight.
Written By Esoka
May 14, 2017, 10:26 p.m.(6/18/1006 AR)
I feel like I have a lot to write about, but I don't know where to start. I thought, when I came to Arx some months ago, that I would be gone and back to the Twainfort after the Silent Army was defeated. I still yearn for the delta lands of the Twin Rivers, but I now think it shall be long before I'm home again. Riven is establishing itself in the city, and I would help Count Thesarin and Lady Tikva with that. There is much rebuilding to do, in the city and in the Gray Forest. My duties are here. The world is a more complicated and darker place than I think I let myself know before, and so new duties come with that.
Lady Niamh Greenmarch has accepted me as a knight in her Gold Order. As I was the first knight to join, she's made me her second-in-command. This is a heavy thing, but I will try and do well by it. The work she intends is of the highest importance right now. There are many places in this land that do not know the protection and order an honorable force of knights can provide. And even with Tolemar Brand slain, not all evil is gone from this world. She aims to stand up to those who call upon the Abyss, and I shall stand with her. It is my hope that more knights and warriors and scholars, and good men and women of all kinds, will answer her call to it in the coming days.
There is hard work to do, but I'm not sorry I'll be staying in Arx for the moment. I've made friends and met many good people here. I feel I'm finding my place within the Graysons and Deepwoods. Also, this week I got a very lovely flower to wear in my hair. This was important. I am noting it for the record.
Lady Niamh Greenmarch has accepted me as a knight in her Gold Order. As I was the first knight to join, she's made me her second-in-command. This is a heavy thing, but I will try and do well by it. The work she intends is of the highest importance right now. There are many places in this land that do not know the protection and order an honorable force of knights can provide. And even with Tolemar Brand slain, not all evil is gone from this world. She aims to stand up to those who call upon the Abyss, and I shall stand with her. It is my hope that more knights and warriors and scholars, and good men and women of all kinds, will answer her call to it in the coming days.
There is hard work to do, but I'm not sorry I'll be staying in Arx for the moment. I've made friends and met many good people here. I feel I'm finding my place within the Graysons and Deepwoods. Also, this week I got a very lovely flower to wear in my hair. This was important. I am noting it for the record.
Written By Esoka
May 11, 2017, 12:24 a.m.(6/10/1006 AR)
Gild is a goddess I've always honored, but in a distant way. My heart is with the forests and wilds of Petrichor more easily. But after the siege, and seeing how the city of Arx rose up in defense of all her quarters, I feel driven to Gild's guidance now in a way I never have before. There is beauty in the cities and roads and structure civilization and charity provide. There is much to rebuild. I hope I helped a little. All honors to the Iron Guard and everyone else lending a hand in the reclaiming of good order of life in this sprawling, strange, wonderful place I call home for a time now.
Written By Esoka
May 7, 2017, 8:01 p.m.(6/4/1006 AR)
I thought it was the end of me.
The armies at the Seawatch Gate had fought strong and true. Marquessa Deepwood and Thesarin's plan with the prodigals had worked, and they came from the rear to take some of the pressure off the assault. I shall remember Tikva and the archers pouring arrows down like a rain of death from the ramparts, and fighting beside Lord Rymarr to hold the line. It was the greatest battle of my life, and I've more pride than I can put into words that I fought beside the Grayson and Lycene warriors that day.
Would we have held? In my heart, I think not.
But then it all stopped. The monsters faded into nothingness. The shavs stood on the field as if all will had been drained out of them. Many were taken prisoner, thank all gods. Perhaps some can be made whole again, out of whatever horror Brand made them into.
I learned later that the ones now called Paladins had felled Brand by their own swords. The world owes them its thanks, forevermore. They certain have mine. All honors be.
I want to celebrate, but then I think about what lies ahead. Ten thousand soldiers dead. The countless civilians. The horror that was done to the Thrax ward and the poor thralls when the walls shattered. Tikva lying in the House of the Solace, recovering from a wound I thought would end her. I wonder what state the Twainfort is in, and shudder when I think of the Gray Forest.
I think it shall be a very long time before I can think of it with any clarity.
I need a drink.
The armies at the Seawatch Gate had fought strong and true. Marquessa Deepwood and Thesarin's plan with the prodigals had worked, and they came from the rear to take some of the pressure off the assault. I shall remember Tikva and the archers pouring arrows down like a rain of death from the ramparts, and fighting beside Lord Rymarr to hold the line. It was the greatest battle of my life, and I've more pride than I can put into words that I fought beside the Grayson and Lycene warriors that day.
Would we have held? In my heart, I think not.
But then it all stopped. The monsters faded into nothingness. The shavs stood on the field as if all will had been drained out of them. Many were taken prisoner, thank all gods. Perhaps some can be made whole again, out of whatever horror Brand made them into.
I learned later that the ones now called Paladins had felled Brand by their own swords. The world owes them its thanks, forevermore. They certain have mine. All honors be.
I want to celebrate, but then I think about what lies ahead. Ten thousand soldiers dead. The countless civilians. The horror that was done to the Thrax ward and the poor thralls when the walls shattered. Tikva lying in the House of the Solace, recovering from a wound I thought would end her. I wonder what state the Twainfort is in, and shudder when I think of the Gray Forest.
I think it shall be a very long time before I can think of it with any clarity.
I need a drink.
Written By Esoka
May 4, 2017, 11:30 p.m.(5/25/1006 AR)
I do not fear death. I have known battle all my adult life, and even before I was technically old enough to fight, when my tribe was splintered and broken. My only fear is what the world shall be if we fail. Oblivion. Emptiness beyond death.
We will not fail. We shall get it done.
I have always believed in the gods of the pantheon. My grandfather told me stories of them, even if they were rougher and different tales than I would later find in the Compact shrines. I thought I knew them, and yet to see them work in the world still takes my breath. But it gives me heart, as well, to know the gods are on our side. That our fight is righteous.
To the pantheon, I pray, on the eve of battle like I have never seen. I pray that I serve you as well as I can.
Limerance, place resolve in my heart, that I may draw strength from my knightly oaths and show protection and fidelity for my comrades-in-arms. Vellichor, grant me wisdom and a clear head in these hours of turmoil. Jayus, inspire my eyes to see not only the chaos and bloodshed, but the beauty found in acts of bravery and heroism. Sentinel, may each sword stroke be done with justice in your righteous caused, aimed true at the heart of your enemies.
To Lagoma, I offer my highest thanks for your Mercies that shall be on the battlefields, tending the hurts of the armies and keeping so many who might otherwise find their ends alive.
For Mangata, I raise a cup of cider and give my gratitude for the sustenance we've maintained during this long siege. I have not given up alcohol, I will confess, despite some odd calls to do so from certain highborn men. I hope you approve.
To Gild and Petrichor, I make a promise. That when this is done, I shall do my part in bringing order back to your roads and cities, and seeing your forests returned to health and beauty. The Bringers have corrupted your lands. The hands of men and women will have to work long to make them whole again.
To the gods I've prayed to little in my life, and still do not know well. I would know you better in the years to come. Tehom, let me look into the dark corners of my soul and find no reason to fear. Skald, the first choice, may the path I carve for myself end in victory. Aion, may your Dream continue, and may I create something worthy in it.
To the Queen of Endings, if this is your time to take me, may my soul come readily and gently into whatever waits for me beyond this life.
Gloria. All words seem lacking. I pray I am enough. That I can be worthy, in whatever honor and courage I possess, of what you may ask of me. That I can be more, when it matters most.
We will not fail. We shall get it done.
I have always believed in the gods of the pantheon. My grandfather told me stories of them, even if they were rougher and different tales than I would later find in the Compact shrines. I thought I knew them, and yet to see them work in the world still takes my breath. But it gives me heart, as well, to know the gods are on our side. That our fight is righteous.
To the pantheon, I pray, on the eve of battle like I have never seen. I pray that I serve you as well as I can.
Limerance, place resolve in my heart, that I may draw strength from my knightly oaths and show protection and fidelity for my comrades-in-arms. Vellichor, grant me wisdom and a clear head in these hours of turmoil. Jayus, inspire my eyes to see not only the chaos and bloodshed, but the beauty found in acts of bravery and heroism. Sentinel, may each sword stroke be done with justice in your righteous caused, aimed true at the heart of your enemies.
To Lagoma, I offer my highest thanks for your Mercies that shall be on the battlefields, tending the hurts of the armies and keeping so many who might otherwise find their ends alive.
For Mangata, I raise a cup of cider and give my gratitude for the sustenance we've maintained during this long siege. I have not given up alcohol, I will confess, despite some odd calls to do so from certain highborn men. I hope you approve.
To Gild and Petrichor, I make a promise. That when this is done, I shall do my part in bringing order back to your roads and cities, and seeing your forests returned to health and beauty. The Bringers have corrupted your lands. The hands of men and women will have to work long to make them whole again.
To the gods I've prayed to little in my life, and still do not know well. I would know you better in the years to come. Tehom, let me look into the dark corners of my soul and find no reason to fear. Skald, the first choice, may the path I carve for myself end in victory. Aion, may your Dream continue, and may I create something worthy in it.
To the Queen of Endings, if this is your time to take me, may my soul come readily and gently into whatever waits for me beyond this life.
Gloria. All words seem lacking. I pray I am enough. That I can be worthy, in whatever honor and courage I possess, of what you may ask of me. That I can be more, when it matters most.
Written By Esoka
May 1, 2017, 1:34 a.m.(5/16/1006 AR)
The siege rages outside the city. Battle nears. I wish it would come. The waiting always stretches my nerves more than the act itself. In action, I am most alive.
My affairs are in order. I understand my place in the defense of the gate. I shall not falter when the time comes.
And I've had a bit of fun.
My nerves feel looser tonight.
I am as ready as I can be.
My affairs are in order. I understand my place in the defense of the gate. I shall not falter when the time comes.
And I've had a bit of fun.
My nerves feel looser tonight.
I am as ready as I can be.
Written By Esoka
April 29, 2017, 12:27 a.m.(5/12/1006 AR)
Relationship Note on Rymarr
When I was a girl, tales of knights were distant, foreign things. Legends from a world of which I was not a part. Grim, towering warriors on horseback, shining and stoic and untouchable. Most knights I've met in life do not live up to this image. I certainly do not, and struggle with how I feel about my own knighthood still, on many days. But the Marquis of Deepwood is a man who matches the picture of a knight I held in my head a girl. I am honored to know him, and that I can seek his counsel on matters of swordsmanship and command. Most importantly, he treats Marquessa Samantha well.
Written By Esoka
April 22, 2017, 11:20 p.m.(4/26/1006 AR)
I pray to Limerance often, but it is rarely for love. The oaths of duty and fidelity have shaped my life. First to my tribe and family, then to House Riven when the herons and the Greenwoods became one and the same.
Passion and lust pull me easily. But love? I have given it little thought.
From what I understand of marriages among the Compact highborn, they are forged of duty. For diplomacy and resources and the good of your blood. These things make sense to me.
But I see in Marquessa Samantha Match with Lord Rymarr love, as well. I don't think of myself as a romantic, but that makes my heart sing for the marquessa, from one woman to another.
That is a fine thing to find in your life, if you can manage it.
And he seems a strong, worthy man who will bring the Deepwoods much. It all, it seems to me, is for the good.
Limerance's blessings come in many forms, and love and duty do not always have to come separately. I shall think on this more.
Passion and lust pull me easily. But love? I have given it little thought.
From what I understand of marriages among the Compact highborn, they are forged of duty. For diplomacy and resources and the good of your blood. These things make sense to me.
But I see in Marquessa Samantha Match with Lord Rymarr love, as well. I don't think of myself as a romantic, but that makes my heart sing for the marquessa, from one woman to another.
That is a fine thing to find in your life, if you can manage it.
And he seems a strong, worthy man who will bring the Deepwoods much. It all, it seems to me, is for the good.
Limerance's blessings come in many forms, and love and duty do not always have to come separately. I shall think on this more.
Written By Esoka
April 19, 2017, 11:35 p.m.(4/20/1006 AR)
Relationship Note on Calaudrin
Good man to drink and smoke with. Decent shot. Unafraid to take charge when need be. Would follow into battle again. He should remember that he's flammable, though.
Written By Esoka
April 16, 2017, 11:19 p.m.(4/14/1006 AR)
Relationship Note on Shadow
The Compact-born speak of Prodigals as if we were all the same. One amorphous tribe out in the wildlands. Not thousands of tribes, thousands of tongues that do not speak with each other. It insults me. And yet, when I find another who bent the knee and knows the weight of that, my instinct is to embrace him as a brother. We are nothing alike, yet share much. I pray he is successful in his attempt to fight the darkness that surrounds us. And I wonder how like him I was, when I first bent the knee. Is that wildness still in me? I pray is it, somewhere, even if time has smoothed the edges. For I love the part of me that is like this.
Written By Esoka
April 16, 2017, 6:04 p.m.(4/14/1006 AR)
The night seemed an ordinary one.
And yet not ordinary. The stew watery from the press on resources in the city. The civilians, even children, huddled together, looking for the strength that comes in just being surrounded by more people. I have been to war, but never so long in a city under siege. Every moment of it presses on the nerves.
His eyes were wrong. And when I pulled closer to him, I saw that everything about him was wrong. Bringers amongst us. In the guise of servants, and mothers with bundles of evil disguised as babes.
Everything about them is wrong.
The fight is a blur, there were so many of the creatures. I will remember the Graysons, and those who were simply in the wrong place at the wrong time, taking up arms to protect those who could not fight. I will remember Thesarin taking Tikva to safety. I will remember that our steel ended those monsters, and that they can be killed.
We shall kill each Bringer to the last, and we shall protect our own.
And I shall pray for the morning when ordinary no longer means this.
And yet not ordinary. The stew watery from the press on resources in the city. The civilians, even children, huddled together, looking for the strength that comes in just being surrounded by more people. I have been to war, but never so long in a city under siege. Every moment of it presses on the nerves.
His eyes were wrong. And when I pulled closer to him, I saw that everything about him was wrong. Bringers amongst us. In the guise of servants, and mothers with bundles of evil disguised as babes.
Everything about them is wrong.
The fight is a blur, there were so many of the creatures. I will remember the Graysons, and those who were simply in the wrong place at the wrong time, taking up arms to protect those who could not fight. I will remember Thesarin taking Tikva to safety. I will remember that our steel ended those monsters, and that they can be killed.
We shall kill each Bringer to the last, and we shall protect our own.
And I shall pray for the morning when ordinary no longer means this.
Written By Esoka
April 8, 2017, 11:21 p.m.(3/26/1006 AR)
When I think of my father, my memories come in impressions like dreams. The smell of leather and pipe smoke. The glint of the sun off his ax as he practiced his forms among the warriors. His rough voice and blue eyes, like mine.
I can't say I knew him. I was barely older than little Lord Tiber when he fell, in one of the countless fights over game and territory that mark the Gray Forests. My mother told me stories and built a tapestry of memories out of them like a blanket. I was told I'm like him, but I don't know if it's true, much as I'd like it to be.
My mind goes often to the dead these days. My mother, my father, my grandfather. Ancestors that were long dead before I even drew breath. Bonds long gone.
I dream of them. If it was just a dream. I wonder what they would make of my life. Would they be proud of what I've carved for myself? Or would they wish I'd taken to a free life in the forests and refused to bend the knee, like my wild sister so long gone?
I know not. But I hope, in my heart, they'd be proud that my sword is to be put against the dark forces besieging this city right now. There are times I think I can feel them, even if they are long gone.
I don't care if this is a dream or not. It gives me strength, and makes me hold close where I come from. I shall take of that what I can get.
I can't say I knew him. I was barely older than little Lord Tiber when he fell, in one of the countless fights over game and territory that mark the Gray Forests. My mother told me stories and built a tapestry of memories out of them like a blanket. I was told I'm like him, but I don't know if it's true, much as I'd like it to be.
My mind goes often to the dead these days. My mother, my father, my grandfather. Ancestors that were long dead before I even drew breath. Bonds long gone.
I dream of them. If it was just a dream. I wonder what they would make of my life. Would they be proud of what I've carved for myself? Or would they wish I'd taken to a free life in the forests and refused to bend the knee, like my wild sister so long gone?
I know not. But I hope, in my heart, they'd be proud that my sword is to be put against the dark forces besieging this city right now. There are times I think I can feel them, even if they are long gone.
I don't care if this is a dream or not. It gives me strength, and makes me hold close where I come from. I shall take of that what I can get.
Written By Esoka
April 8, 2017, 1:01 a.m.(3/25/1006 AR)
When I think of my mother, my first memories are of her voice. Low and sweet but still strong. Drifting off to her lullabies as I slept as a girl. Hearing the echoes of the songs she led the tribesman in during prayer, or before the hunt, or battle.
I'm a terrible singer. Evona inherited all my mother's graces. I took after my father. Hard as a rock and a voice like a pained ox, as my sister put it.
Yet I love music still, however bollocks I am for it. I don't understand why a song has the power to transport the heart, or to give rhythm to the march of armies, but I feel the power in me still.
I felt it as the Songbird, Calandra, sang to the populace in the city theater. Sang to lift spirits, and the remember the fallen. I felt both.
It is the songs that live in our hearts, as well as the blood and sweat and pain.
I'm a terrible singer. Evona inherited all my mother's graces. I took after my father. Hard as a rock and a voice like a pained ox, as my sister put it.
Yet I love music still, however bollocks I am for it. I don't understand why a song has the power to transport the heart, or to give rhythm to the march of armies, but I feel the power in me still.
I felt it as the Songbird, Calandra, sang to the populace in the city theater. Sang to lift spirits, and the remember the fallen. I felt both.
It is the songs that live in our hearts, as well as the blood and sweat and pain.
Written By Esoka
March 31, 2017, 11:03 p.m.(3/10/1006 AR)
Relationship Note on Edelma
The Sword of Giant's Reach hits hard, drinks hard, and laughs hard at stupid jokes about men and their whales. We're fast friends.
Written By Esoka
March 29, 2017, 11:42 p.m.(3/7/1006 AR)
The fight is a rush in my mind, but it always is. A blur of action, a mix of calculation and instinct that takes over my brain and muscles when the blade is in my hand.
The guardsman, Calaudrin, offering me whiskey one moment and calling out orders to man the walls and rain fire on the oncoming shavs the next. We were fortunate to have him. Quick, decisive orders are the difference between life and death in those moments.
The sight of the Bringer. The noble girl, who'd I'd have thought as no fit warrior, taking up a bow and doing her part. She, Dulcinea, killed the creature with me when it reached the walls. A fine way to earn your first blood, that.
They did not breach the walls. We did our part.
It was a small fight. And there will be many others to follow. Gods preserve me, I feel more a part of this city - this Compact - each time I bleed for it.
The guardsman, Calaudrin, offering me whiskey one moment and calling out orders to man the walls and rain fire on the oncoming shavs the next. We were fortunate to have him. Quick, decisive orders are the difference between life and death in those moments.
The sight of the Bringer. The noble girl, who'd I'd have thought as no fit warrior, taking up a bow and doing her part. She, Dulcinea, killed the creature with me when it reached the walls. A fine way to earn your first blood, that.
They did not breach the walls. We did our part.
It was a small fight. And there will be many others to follow. Gods preserve me, I feel more a part of this city - this Compact - each time I bleed for it.
Written By Esoka
March 26, 2017, 11:25 p.m.(3/1/1006 AR)
I was bred for battle. I was my father's daughter, and always knew what my life would be. I killed my first man and became a blooded warrior of my tribe when I was not more than thirteen. My sword has been Riven's, has been Thesarin's, for more than a decade gone, and it has been tested many times.
I have never seen a crush of battle like I saw tonight, when the Bringers came against the city.
I survived the crashing of the storm. I like to think I cut down a fair few of that army on my way to living another day.
By Gloria, I never feel more alive than after facing death, gods help me.
It isn't death I fear. But men who can be burnt alive without screaming? Knights and war machines that disappear into some foul ether? These are things that chill my soul.
What are we facing out there?
Gloria give me strength to meet it again, and protect those I love.
I have never seen a crush of battle like I saw tonight, when the Bringers came against the city.
I survived the crashing of the storm. I like to think I cut down a fair few of that army on my way to living another day.
By Gloria, I never feel more alive than after facing death, gods help me.
It isn't death I fear. But men who can be burnt alive without screaming? Knights and war machines that disappear into some foul ether? These are things that chill my soul.
What are we facing out there?
Gloria give me strength to meet it again, and protect those I love.
Written By Esoka
March 26, 2017, 4:22 p.m.(2/28/1006 AR)
Relationship Note on Samantha
In bloodshed and chaos, Marquessa Samantha Deepwood finds strength through unity and respect. It is no wonder 30,000 Abandoned turned to follow her. I often feel odd among Compact nobility, but I'm proud to be sworn to House Riven, and prouder that we follow this lady of the Deepwood in whatever she shall make of the world.
Written By Esoka
March 19, 2017, 10:41 p.m.(2/14/1006 AR)
Relationship Note on Edda
Solid as a mountain, and very nearly as tall. I feel very far from my roots many days, but Edda always makes me feel grounded in where I come from, and where I have found myself in these strange times. My blood, my tribeswoman, my fellow woman-at-arms in House Riven.
Written By Esoka
March 19, 2017, 7:01 p.m.(2/14/1006 AR)
Relationship Note on Thesarin
My life has been bound up with Thesarin's for so long I cannot remember a time when it was not. My tribesman of the Greenwoods. My leader, when the tribe was broken, and I had to find another path. My count, and I his knight, when we became this thing they call prodigal. My duty to him and his gives my life form and function, even when all else seems dark. He shall have my sword and my blood so long as I live.
Written By Esoka
March 19, 2017, 3:16 p.m.(2/14/1006 AR)
Relationship Note on Tikva
There are few among the Compact highborn I would count as proper friends, but Lady Tikva is one of them. Wise and sweet and her company is always delightful. Riven is lucky to have her.
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