Written By Audric
March 5, 2018, 9:26 a.m.(4/21/1008 AR)
For those who are planning to do this incredibly dangerous thing with me: Stick with me, and you'll never hunger for fame again. We happy few that survive will live forever in history. Just try not to get in the way of my sword. This is going to be so much fun!
Written By Audric
March 5, 2018, 9:24 a.m.(4/21/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Talen
She has her oaths. I would never ask her to break them. There is a reason that, despite our casual antagonism, Shard has been my second for years. She's caustic, vaguely hostile, incredibly vicious, and I'd not have her any other way.
Written By Audric
March 5, 2018, 2:31 a.m.(4/20/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Shard
Except you, because I know you still secretly pine for me. I take your constant mild hostility as a sign of dearest affection.
Written By Audric
March 5, 2018, 2:30 a.m.(4/20/1008 AR)
Have none of you ever read a book!? Confessing your feelings makes you at least twice as likely to get stabbed. It's just practicality, people.
Written By Audric
Feb. 3, 2018, 8:40 a.m.(2/10/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Tikva
Theater, wall, Farhaven, Shardhaven - so yeah, four I guess? It's really becoming a habit. Eventually I'm going to have to bill you, you know, or people will start thinking I have something resembling a heart.
Written By Audric
Feb. 3, 2018, 7:06 a.m.(2/10/1008 AR)
All this talk, talk talk talk about how the commoners didn't support the city during the siege, or how bad it was. I was a commoner during the siege. Quite a few people still talk about what I did at the Seawatch Wall. Killed a whole lotta things that day, got all hip deep in blood! It was the kind of fun you just don't -get- outside of heroic last stands! And now people mad about Bastien's play, pffft. I love it. My only criticism is that it doesn't have a slightly loony soldier type who's just really enjoying the opportunity to have endless monsters to kill without any crisis of conscience!
Also, the siege was the first time I saved Tikva's butt, marking a series of events that keeps happening, despite her never actually -paying- me to do it. Wait, no, second, there was that theater thing, but really I was just having too much fun for that to -really- count. How often do you get to see people you don't like die -and- kill monsters by the score? Very rarely.
Also, the siege was the first time I saved Tikva's butt, marking a series of events that keeps happening, despite her never actually -paying- me to do it. Wait, no, second, there was that theater thing, but really I was just having too much fun for that to -really- count. How often do you get to see people you don't like die -and- kill monsters by the score? Very rarely.
Written By Audric
Jan. 31, 2018, 6:31 a.m.(1/25/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Thena
Just remember to take them out every couple of hours and make sure there's kibble and water in their dishes, so on and so forth.
Written By Audric
Jan. 27, 2018, 7:12 a.m.(1/17/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Driskell
You know, when someone jerks off so much about minor things, it makes me wonder. You're a Tehom fella, yeah? Ever stared into a mirror, and -really- accepted what looks back at you? You're tiresome. Do -anything- before looking so far down your nose at people, lest I break it for you to correct the angle.
Written By Audric
Jan. 25, 2018, 11:46 p.m.(1/14/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Karadoc
I love the hell out of my piles of money, and plenty of people love me a lot! As long as you're properly charming, greed can basically be a virtue.
Written By Audric
Jan. 24, 2018, 6:59 a.m.(1/11/1008 AR)
When she comes around again, I hope she spots the little tweaks to her figurine that I advised on and appreciates them. I didn't have all my minions buy all of them, which was a monumental effort of willpower on my part.
Written By Audric
Jan. 17, 2018, 8:29 p.m.(12/26/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on Cambria
Enthusiastically disagree! I am perfectly loyal to whoever hires me. And I guess my lieges now, but that's more of a technicality really.
Written By Audric
Jan. 6, 2018, 4:30 a.m.(12/1/1007 AR)
My everything hurts. Not dead though. Do not believe the rumors. My death will be far more spectacular than that. Now I'm going to sleep until my bones heal. Ow. Ow.
Written By Audric
Jan. 2, 2018, 3:01 a.m.(11/19/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on Eleyna
I wouldn't be too hard on the man, Archduchess. After all, maybe he was hearing someone of a mind with me, and you know firsthand how if I get the slightest bit bored of a conversational topic, no matter how terribly serious the matter is, I am entirely willing and fantastically capable of slowly turning the entire conversation into the setup for several lewd jokes. I'm a terrible example of nobility, really. All joke and no seriousness ever.
Written By Audric
Dec. 26, 2017, 12:50 a.m.(11/4/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on Logan
Shard's the wolf enthusiast that I know, but I'm pretty sure wolves don't eat their alphas when they get sick. Or have alphas.
Written By Audric
Dec. 21, 2017, 2:48 a.m.(10/23/1007 AR)
Death is one of those things many people don't really think about until it's too late. It's something sellswords never stop thinking about. Our job, fairly often, is to die so the bannermen can live. Avoiding that fate is a big part of why I'm the Few's Captain-General. I'm very good at it. Anyway. I've lost many, many, many friends, and at this point, even the woman that I loved beyond anything else. But we don't mourn. We live by the blade, by the clash of steel. When we die, our friends celebrate our lives and cast our ashes to the wind, then go and do whatever the fuck they think we'd like the most. Don't mourn your dead. The Wheel turns, and we all meet the Queen in the end. Celebrate the life that was lived.
When I die messily, eventually, if any of you fuckers are all sappy, I will come back and haunt you. Throw a fucking party and champion their causes, instead of mourning.
When I die messily, eventually, if any of you fuckers are all sappy, I will come back and haunt you. Throw a fucking party and champion their causes, instead of mourning.
Written By Audric
Dec. 21, 2017, 2:44 a.m.(10/23/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on Zhayla
Get well soon!
Written By Audric
Dec. 17, 2017, 6:13 a.m.(10/15/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on Shard
I have told you for several years now, my darling second, that the peace we have is what we take by bloody fingertips and broken bones. That is the peace people like us have.
Written By Audric
Dec. 17, 2017, 6:10 a.m.(10/15/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on Reese
As it happens, it only takes a couple thousand silver to fill a bathtub. Even in gold, filling a bathtub, it's not -that- difficult. I could probably fill a small lake, if asked.
Written By Audric
Dec. 8, 2017, 4:27 a.m.(9/23/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on Nierzen
I will, thanks!
Written By Audric
Nov. 30, 2017, 8:54 p.m.(9/9/1007 AR)
Relationship Note on Driskell
The trick to having a good sense of balance is to get really drunk a lot. That way, when you're sober, you've got all this experience from staying upright while wobbling around!
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