Written By Sina
Nov. 8, 2018, 9:59 a.m.(12/15/1009 AR)
I have been working on a new art project of late. Rather than trying to force the paintings, the advice of that old wood carver on the Thrax tour comes to my mind. His advice was to simply let the art speak for itself, to let Jayus guide my hand. And so, as these new pieces come to life, I hope they will do so with pure inspiration, rather than focused and rigid intention. They may be my most important work yet.
I have been feeling a little under the weather lately. Perhaps it is the melancholia which arrives with the cooler, darker seasons. Perhaps it is the things that I have seen these past two weeks. Most likely the latter. But I have decided to rest for one or two days.
I have been feeling a little under the weather lately. Perhaps it is the melancholia which arrives with the cooler, darker seasons. Perhaps it is the things that I have seen these past two weeks. Most likely the latter. But I have decided to rest for one or two days.
Written By Sina
Oct. 30, 2018, 2:11 p.m.(11/25/1009 AR)
Relationship Note on Sparte
Today I received a beautiful gift - a sundial pendant, inscribed with the Canticle of Vellichor. Thank you, Scholar Sparte, for the very thoughtful gift. I will treasure it.
Written By Sina
Oct. 29, 2018, 5:54 p.m.(11/23/1009 AR)
Another birthday has come and gone. I have grown a little older, and in the past year, my responsibilities, too, have grown.
I do not keep track of the anniversary of my birth very well. Perhaps next year, it will come and I will remember it. I think sometimes about my mother. Who she is. Where she is. Does she remember?
I do not keep track of the anniversary of my birth very well. Perhaps next year, it will come and I will remember it. I think sometimes about my mother. Who she is. Where she is. Does she remember?
Written By Sina
Sept. 24, 2018, 4:19 p.m.(8/28/1009 AR)
Relationship Note on Reigna
Sometimes we must weigh what is most important in our lives, and consider what we can handle. The life of a Scholar is by no means an easy one, and it is quite a dedication of one's time and resources. It is understandable that you must cull the responsibilities to lighten your workload. Given all that you have on your plate, while we are sorry to see that you have set aside your Scholar's pendant for now, please know that you are always welcome back as a Scholar at any time, Marquessa. We will always have a place for you. We will always be here for you, and we will always seek your wisdom in kind. We thank you for your service to Vellichor, and hope that you will find your way back into our ranks one day.
Written By Sina
Sept. 24, 2018, 4:41 a.m.(8/27/1009 AR)
Sometimes we find knowledge in the most unexpected of places. Today was a day for learning.
Written By Sina
Sept. 21, 2018, 3:54 p.m.(8/22/1009 AR)
Relationship Note on Saoirse
For the record, I am not opposed to puns.
Written By Sina
Sept. 18, 2018, 5:35 p.m.(8/16/1009 AR)
Relationship Note on Delilah
My only regret is that we have not met sooner. I enjoyed our meeting of the minds very much, and I look forward to future discussions, and you have inspired me to new avenues of thought and study. A Scholar's life is ever-learning, and I look forward to seeing your project in its full manifestation.
Written By Sina
Sept. 13, 2018, 4:36 p.m.(8/4/1009 AR)
Relationship Note on Niklas
I'm glad to hear that you didn't die from that unfortunate mishap with the stairs. We would be bereft without you, I am certain. It sounds like your sister got the better end of that wager.
The Scholar hats are a nice suggestion. We should look into what can be done to make actual Scholars more easy to recognize.
The Scholar hats are a nice suggestion. We should look into what can be done to make actual Scholars more easy to recognize.
Written By Sina
Sept. 13, 2018, 1:42 p.m.(8/4/1009 AR)
Relationship Note on Niklas
Please send me the name of this scholar who lost your journal entry. We will have words. This sounds highly suspect. A Scholar's first duty is to safeguard the words of gods and men.
Written By Sina
Sept. 12, 2018, 5:56 p.m.(8/2/1009 AR)
I am an only child. I have never known what it is like to have siblings. My father is long dead, and I don't know what happened to my mother. I have a new family now, in the Faith, but sometimes I wonder what it would have been like, having a normal family. Would I have made the choices I have made? I don't know.
Sometimes I wonder where my mother is, or if she is even still alive. Did she have other children? Or was I really the only one? She was a thrall, sold off when I was a child.
I wonder if those who own thralls even realize the harm caused by this. That my mother was sold off like some piece of meat somewhere does bother me. Quite a bit. People should not be property, bartered away, ripped away from family. She was my mother, and while I never knew her, I often wish it had been different.
I thought about looking for her, but what are the chances that I would ever find her in this vast world? She could be anywhere. But maybe it's better this way. I am free to choose my own life. A choice she never had. I like to think she would be proud of me.
Sometimes I wonder where my mother is, or if she is even still alive. Did she have other children? Or was I really the only one? She was a thrall, sold off when I was a child.
I wonder if those who own thralls even realize the harm caused by this. That my mother was sold off like some piece of meat somewhere does bother me. Quite a bit. People should not be property, bartered away, ripped away from family. She was my mother, and while I never knew her, I often wish it had been different.
I thought about looking for her, but what are the chances that I would ever find her in this vast world? She could be anywhere. But maybe it's better this way. I am free to choose my own life. A choice she never had. I like to think she would be proud of me.
Written By Sina
Sept. 12, 2018, 4:04 a.m.(8/1/1009 AR)
Every once in a while, I enjoy browsing through the stacks. Just walking among the books archived there fills me with a sense of pride in the people of the Compact, for all of their contributions. The rich history of the recent past, as well as rediscoveries from the more distant past, are always a source of endless fascination for me. I cannot help but marvel at the number of carefully enscribed tomes there, the detailed recounting of the recent struggles we have faced, and the beauty of poetry and song hidden within the shelves like little gems, waiting to be discovered.
One thing I did note was that there were quite a lot of books that seemed to be out of place. I have put them back into their proper places. There's something just so very satisfying, seeing the sets of historical texts back in their proper order. They look much more aesthetically pleasing now. There were also a couple of new additions in the book drop, and I was pleased to be able to add those to the archive as well.
I finished my painting as well, and sent that off to Inquisitor Aleksei to include it in the auction. I am pleased with it.
The only strange thing that happened today was that alchemist fellow in the market, with his stage and his potions. Some sort of mass hysteria seemed to overtake the crowd there, and it seemed to me they might have believed anything they were told, given their giddy moods. The Physicians seemed to have it well in hand, however.
It's been a long and productive day, overall. There is much yet to do, but I suppose it's time for rest.
One thing I did note was that there were quite a lot of books that seemed to be out of place. I have put them back into their proper places. There's something just so very satisfying, seeing the sets of historical texts back in their proper order. They look much more aesthetically pleasing now. There were also a couple of new additions in the book drop, and I was pleased to be able to add those to the archive as well.
I finished my painting as well, and sent that off to Inquisitor Aleksei to include it in the auction. I am pleased with it.
The only strange thing that happened today was that alchemist fellow in the market, with his stage and his potions. Some sort of mass hysteria seemed to overtake the crowd there, and it seemed to me they might have believed anything they were told, given their giddy moods. The Physicians seemed to have it well in hand, however.
It's been a long and productive day, overall. There is much yet to do, but I suppose it's time for rest.
Written By Sina
Sept. 12, 2018, 1:11 a.m.(8/1/1009 AR)
I seem to recall that the statue of Koraj Marin was to be moved elsewhere, that history not be desteoyed. While I agree the statue has no place in the Hall of Heroes, destroying it destroys a piece of history that should not be forgotten. Forgetting is what gets us into trouble.
Written By Sina
Sept. 11, 2018, 11:47 p.m.(7/28/1009 AR)
I have been working on a rather special project. There is not much that I have been able to find to do in preparation for defense of the Lodge, but I was approached recently to create a painting for the upcoming auction sponsored by the Inquisition. This is a piece that I am quite excited to work on, and I have been pouring my heart and soul into it. I hope that it does well in the auction, but I'm just happy to be able to contribute something. It is nearly finished, and while it is unlikely I will be able to actually attend the auction itself, I hope that it finds a good home, for a good cause.
Written By Sina
Sept. 5, 2018, 3:26 p.m.(7/16/1009 AR)
Relationship Note on Arcadia
You always have a choice; to be the hero, or to be the evil wizard.
What defines a hero, and what defines an evil wizard? Well, I think things are a bit more complicated than they may seem, on the surface. Sure, everyone knows what a hero is. A person who is virtuous (or maybe even not that virtuous) but who does brave things, selflessly (or maybe not even selflessly), for the benefit of others (or for glory). A person who is lauded by their peers as someone who has done great deeds on behalf of House, Faith, Compact or family. A hero may give their life in the service of others, or walk away from a battle with deep scars for the rest of his life, but knowing that he has saved many lives in the process. A hero may simply disappear to unknown parts, like Lady Aislin, and no one will know what became of her, though her deeds and legacy will live on because of the great contributions she made while she was with us.
An evil wizard... well, they are a bit more complicated. Sometimes, the evil wizard may even think he is the hero, despite the damage and destruction he causes around him. Sometimes it turns out that the hero, while she may have had the best intentions, can cause unforeseen effects. For example, killing a monster, only to find out that a bigger, more dangerous monster is now freed by that act. The hero is still considered a hero, of course, because in the end, maybe she saved many people, allowing them to live on and fight another day. Maybe she found an artifact that turned the tide in a battle. Maybe she guided a ship home through treacherous waters, or saved children from a burning house. Her cause is just, her intentions good. But the evil wizard... will always be seen as an evil wizard, because of the way he presents himself.
The path of the hero and the villain can be equally treacherous. Sometimes, what we perceive as an evil wizard, may actually be the man trying to save us all, but his methods are so unconventional and strange that none recognize him for what he is. Sometimes the hero we thought we knew turns out to be a wolf in sheep's clothing, hidden in a cloud of deceit only to betray us in the end. And of course, sometimes, maybe even most of the time, a hero is just that - a hero, and a villain is just a villain, and both are exactly as they seem to be.
It is the rare evil wizard, in truth, that actually thinks of himself as evil, I would imagine. Like heroes, evil wizards think they are doing the right thing. They think /they/ are the heroes, the ones who are doing right by the world, the ones who want to make the world a better place, from their own perspective, even if it means destroying or enslaving it. This, of course, doesn't mean that they are right. But in their mind's eye, they are following the righteous path, while we are the ones who are deluded.
So what it all comes down to is your choice, and your unique perspective. Everything you do, whether for good or ill, may have consequences. And people may try to warn you of those consequences, and advise against an action you have proposed. But in the end, it's your choice, whether to heed that advice, or to go on your merry way anyway. The consequences remain, however, whether you choose to consider them or not. And those consequences will define how people perceive you: as a hero, or an evil wizard, or anything in between.
What defines a hero, and what defines an evil wizard? Well, I think things are a bit more complicated than they may seem, on the surface. Sure, everyone knows what a hero is. A person who is virtuous (or maybe even not that virtuous) but who does brave things, selflessly (or maybe not even selflessly), for the benefit of others (or for glory). A person who is lauded by their peers as someone who has done great deeds on behalf of House, Faith, Compact or family. A hero may give their life in the service of others, or walk away from a battle with deep scars for the rest of his life, but knowing that he has saved many lives in the process. A hero may simply disappear to unknown parts, like Lady Aislin, and no one will know what became of her, though her deeds and legacy will live on because of the great contributions she made while she was with us.
An evil wizard... well, they are a bit more complicated. Sometimes, the evil wizard may even think he is the hero, despite the damage and destruction he causes around him. Sometimes it turns out that the hero, while she may have had the best intentions, can cause unforeseen effects. For example, killing a monster, only to find out that a bigger, more dangerous monster is now freed by that act. The hero is still considered a hero, of course, because in the end, maybe she saved many people, allowing them to live on and fight another day. Maybe she found an artifact that turned the tide in a battle. Maybe she guided a ship home through treacherous waters, or saved children from a burning house. Her cause is just, her intentions good. But the evil wizard... will always be seen as an evil wizard, because of the way he presents himself.
The path of the hero and the villain can be equally treacherous. Sometimes, what we perceive as an evil wizard, may actually be the man trying to save us all, but his methods are so unconventional and strange that none recognize him for what he is. Sometimes the hero we thought we knew turns out to be a wolf in sheep's clothing, hidden in a cloud of deceit only to betray us in the end. And of course, sometimes, maybe even most of the time, a hero is just that - a hero, and a villain is just a villain, and both are exactly as they seem to be.
It is the rare evil wizard, in truth, that actually thinks of himself as evil, I would imagine. Like heroes, evil wizards think they are doing the right thing. They think /they/ are the heroes, the ones who are doing right by the world, the ones who want to make the world a better place, from their own perspective, even if it means destroying or enslaving it. This, of course, doesn't mean that they are right. But in their mind's eye, they are following the righteous path, while we are the ones who are deluded.
So what it all comes down to is your choice, and your unique perspective. Everything you do, whether for good or ill, may have consequences. And people may try to warn you of those consequences, and advise against an action you have proposed. But in the end, it's your choice, whether to heed that advice, or to go on your merry way anyway. The consequences remain, however, whether you choose to consider them or not. And those consequences will define how people perceive you: as a hero, or an evil wizard, or anything in between.
Written By Sina
Aug. 30, 2018, 2:19 p.m.(6/27/1009 AR)
Relationship Note on Orazio
A scholar's path is learning. A valuable lesson was given to me, and I have taken it to heart. Sometimes, it can be a challenge, learning. I now see my role as Prelate with new eyes. I find myself looking at the world differently. Changed. Thank you for the valuable lesson.
Written By Sina
Aug. 24, 2018, 12:50 p.m.(6/15/1009 AR)
I visited the training center, for the first time ever, last night. Now I wonder why I haven't done so sooner! I met so many new and interesting people, and it seems like it might be a good place to learn. There is always so much learning to do. Learning to fence, learning to speak Marin'alfar, studying the history of the Marin'alfar and their past interactions with the Compact. Wherever will I find time for all the things that I must learn?
Don't get me wrong, dear reader. I am not complaining, not at all. There were some who were worried that taking the vows of the Godsworn might limit me in what I can do in my life. I can assure you, this is entirely incorrect. I have never been more busy, and more fulfilled, than I am right now. And though I feel a sense of foreboding for what may be coming, there are gilded threads of hope woven through it, shining bright against the darkness.
Don't get me wrong, dear reader. I am not complaining, not at all. There were some who were worried that taking the vows of the Godsworn might limit me in what I can do in my life. I can assure you, this is entirely incorrect. I have never been more busy, and more fulfilled, than I am right now. And though I feel a sense of foreboding for what may be coming, there are gilded threads of hope woven through it, shining bright against the darkness.
Written By Sina
Aug. 21, 2018, 1:46 p.m.(6/9/1009 AR)
I have been quite busy of late, getting settled into my new life as a Godsworn priestess of the Faith, and my new position as Prelate. I am still trying to get used to these changes, and sometimes it's hard for me to hear the words "Sister" and not look over my shoulder, wondering if that person is actually talking to me. But I think I've finally gotten all of my affairs in order, and I finally moved fully into my room in the Rectory.
I will be leaving on another journey. We leave soon, and so now I am busy packing. I just moved in! But I am looking forward to once again gazing upon the sea. There is always some part of me that feels a little thrill when I smell the tang of salt in the air and feel the wind in my hair as a ship rides the waves. I have no idea what to expect from this journey, but hopefully we will find what we are looking for. I do not know how long I will be away, but I was glad to be able to at least enroll Lord Gregori Volkov into the books of the students before leaving. Hopefully I will be able to get some other unfinished business complete as well, before I go.
I will be leaving on another journey. We leave soon, and so now I am busy packing. I just moved in! But I am looking forward to once again gazing upon the sea. There is always some part of me that feels a little thrill when I smell the tang of salt in the air and feel the wind in my hair as a ship rides the waves. I have no idea what to expect from this journey, but hopefully we will find what we are looking for. I do not know how long I will be away, but I was glad to be able to at least enroll Lord Gregori Volkov into the books of the students before leaving. Hopefully I will be able to get some other unfinished business complete as well, before I go.
Written By Sina
Aug. 10, 2018, 2:37 a.m.(5/14/1009 AR)
Relationship Note on Turo
It is Vellichor's charge to us to record our lives within the Whites, that future generations might remember, and that knowledge of what has passed will not be lost. It is up to each of us to decide what we consider important enough to transcribe within these pages. It is all sacred and recorded, and entrusted to our care as Scholars.
I imagine in the future that, in the midst of all the trials and tribulations we may face, some might find a hint of levity and frivolity in our lives as well. We live a colorful existence, and each one of us has a unique perspective. Three people in a room might look at a vase of flowers and see three different things. One might see the vase, the way it is shaped, the patterns on the porcelain; another might see it for the flowers, their beauty, the spray of color; while others might note the play of light and shadow upon both vase and flower. Yet, each one sees the same vase of flowers. Such is it with our lives.
The Whites allow us a glimpse into the lives of each other, into our thoughts, musings, hopes, dreams, troubles, adventures and yes, even the bits of flavor that may seem meaningless to some, but important for others. We share the same Dream, but we envision it differently. We Scholars consider it our sacred obligation to record these things for posterity. There are forces in this world which would squelch our voices. They would see us silenced, and see knowledge lost. We have forgotten things before... important things, and so this is why we record even the tiniest shred of what anyone wishes to share about their lives. That future generations may look back, and see the different facets of our existence.
I imagine in the future that, in the midst of all the trials and tribulations we may face, some might find a hint of levity and frivolity in our lives as well. We live a colorful existence, and each one of us has a unique perspective. Three people in a room might look at a vase of flowers and see three different things. One might see the vase, the way it is shaped, the patterns on the porcelain; another might see it for the flowers, their beauty, the spray of color; while others might note the play of light and shadow upon both vase and flower. Yet, each one sees the same vase of flowers. Such is it with our lives.
The Whites allow us a glimpse into the lives of each other, into our thoughts, musings, hopes, dreams, troubles, adventures and yes, even the bits of flavor that may seem meaningless to some, but important for others. We share the same Dream, but we envision it differently. We Scholars consider it our sacred obligation to record these things for posterity. There are forces in this world which would squelch our voices. They would see us silenced, and see knowledge lost. We have forgotten things before... important things, and so this is why we record even the tiniest shred of what anyone wishes to share about their lives. That future generations may look back, and see the different facets of our existence.
Written By Sina
Aug. 8, 2018, 1:43 a.m.(5/10/1009 AR)
Relationship Note on Esoka
I was very grateful for Esoka's presence and support today. We shared a journey together, and she attended my Godswearing ceremony. I enjoy her company, and her bravery is inspiring to me. Perhaps we will journey together again someday. I am glad to call her a friend.
Written By Sina
Aug. 7, 2018, 4:56 p.m.(5/9/1009 AR)
Today, I am to take my vows in service to the Gods. I have spent the better part of a year in deep contemplation of this decision. Through prayer and a good deal of advice (both for and against) from those I respect and admire, I am convinced that it is the right path for me.
Vows are sacred to Limerance. There is a reason for them, and for why they are taken so seriously. Such decisions certainly are not to be made lightly. But I have made my choice, and I am content with it. I seek not to do so because I consider myself to be anything special, nor do I feel that the Gods favor me in any way. It is simply the choice I have made, because I feel it is the right thing for me, personally, to do.
My life has always been a life of service, for as long as I can remember. I have not regretted a moment of my service to House Thrax, and I shall be forever grateful for the day Prince Elton Thrax elevated me from my drudgery in the kitchens to stand at the side of Princess Donella as her handmaiden, and then Princess Alarissa. This was a position of honor, and I chose to honor my oaths of fealty to House Thrax, even though I gave those oaths when I was very young, merely a child, and served with diligence and, yes, even with a quiet contentment.
Now, however, I feel the call to serve the Gods, and I hope that I may serve them with as much devotion as I have served House Thrax. We freely choose our own path; it is all in how one looks at life. You can choose whether or not to be faithful and true, or to be bitter and resentful, regardless of the circumstances.
My father's ship was destroyed by House Thrax when I was a child, and I lost him to Thrax reavers. My mother was a thrall aboard his ship, and was sold off when I was still a toddler. I don't even remember her. My life has not been an easy one, not by far. I could have chosen the path of resentment, anger, bitterness, and vengeance for my father's death. He was, after all, a pirate, and I am a pirate's daughter. At times, I will confess, parts of me were tempted to that course. But instead, I chose the path of acceptance, peace, and service. (Except for throwing pies. Throwing pies is okay, I think, when it's all in good fun. Not that I threw a pie at High Lord Victus. I would never!)
Anyway, we all have a choice. To do good, or to follow our darker passions (pie throwing aside). There are many who do not care for the dogma of the Thirteenth, but there is a place for it. A reminder that we must all be aware of our darker thoughts and reflections, and to remember that we have a choice. To embrace those darker thoughts and emotions, or to eschew them and embrace the Light instead. (And maybe some good light-hearted fun, because why does life have to be so serious all the time?)
I choose to embrace the Light, and this calling to serve. And so, today I merely take a step further along that journey. My heart is at peace. I will have a new family of brothers and sisters, where before I had no family. I feel a sense of purpose that I never felt before. And while the path may not be an easy one, it is the one that calls to me the most.
I look forward to my new life. There are parts of the old life that I will miss, of course. Becoming Godsworn is not without sacrifice, after all. Some things will be forever barred to me. Marriage. Children. Wealth. I might find myself wanting those first two someday, some have said. Am I sure that I want to do this? To never be able to have offspring of my own, to know the joys of raising a child and leaving a legacy? Surely, some must think, I am too young to be making this choice.
But no. Those things do not sway me from my course. I will be content to adore the children of others, and smile with warmth and happiness when I see others wed. I may not be able to marry, but I will be able to perform the rites that join others in marriage perhaps. That, to me, is enough. More than enough. As for wealth... I have never needed nor wanted it.
Mistress Petal Penrose was kind enough to make me a robe for today's ceremony. I look forward to wearing it. I love the little fishes along the bottom. I am like a fish. Life is the stream, and I go with the current. They are also a perfect little nod to Mangata, whom I hold close in reverence in my heart. Each of the Gods, in their own way, resonate with me. While I will serve specifically in the capacity of Prelate of the Scholars of Vellichor, I hold a special place in my heart for each of the Gods.
It's time to start getting ready now, to get my affairs in order, and to prepare to say goodbye to the life I've known that I might welcome the new one. I have lingered maybe overlong on this journal entry. But I felt it important to get my thoughts written out, that I might never forget the feelings in my heart this day. Vellichor charged us with writing out our most important moments in the Whites, that they may never be forgotten. This is, probably, one of the most important days of my life. And so it is recorded.
Vows are sacred to Limerance. There is a reason for them, and for why they are taken so seriously. Such decisions certainly are not to be made lightly. But I have made my choice, and I am content with it. I seek not to do so because I consider myself to be anything special, nor do I feel that the Gods favor me in any way. It is simply the choice I have made, because I feel it is the right thing for me, personally, to do.
My life has always been a life of service, for as long as I can remember. I have not regretted a moment of my service to House Thrax, and I shall be forever grateful for the day Prince Elton Thrax elevated me from my drudgery in the kitchens to stand at the side of Princess Donella as her handmaiden, and then Princess Alarissa. This was a position of honor, and I chose to honor my oaths of fealty to House Thrax, even though I gave those oaths when I was very young, merely a child, and served with diligence and, yes, even with a quiet contentment.
Now, however, I feel the call to serve the Gods, and I hope that I may serve them with as much devotion as I have served House Thrax. We freely choose our own path; it is all in how one looks at life. You can choose whether or not to be faithful and true, or to be bitter and resentful, regardless of the circumstances.
My father's ship was destroyed by House Thrax when I was a child, and I lost him to Thrax reavers. My mother was a thrall aboard his ship, and was sold off when I was still a toddler. I don't even remember her. My life has not been an easy one, not by far. I could have chosen the path of resentment, anger, bitterness, and vengeance for my father's death. He was, after all, a pirate, and I am a pirate's daughter. At times, I will confess, parts of me were tempted to that course. But instead, I chose the path of acceptance, peace, and service. (Except for throwing pies. Throwing pies is okay, I think, when it's all in good fun. Not that I threw a pie at High Lord Victus. I would never!)
Anyway, we all have a choice. To do good, or to follow our darker passions (pie throwing aside). There are many who do not care for the dogma of the Thirteenth, but there is a place for it. A reminder that we must all be aware of our darker thoughts and reflections, and to remember that we have a choice. To embrace those darker thoughts and emotions, or to eschew them and embrace the Light instead. (And maybe some good light-hearted fun, because why does life have to be so serious all the time?)
I choose to embrace the Light, and this calling to serve. And so, today I merely take a step further along that journey. My heart is at peace. I will have a new family of brothers and sisters, where before I had no family. I feel a sense of purpose that I never felt before. And while the path may not be an easy one, it is the one that calls to me the most.
I look forward to my new life. There are parts of the old life that I will miss, of course. Becoming Godsworn is not without sacrifice, after all. Some things will be forever barred to me. Marriage. Children. Wealth. I might find myself wanting those first two someday, some have said. Am I sure that I want to do this? To never be able to have offspring of my own, to know the joys of raising a child and leaving a legacy? Surely, some must think, I am too young to be making this choice.
But no. Those things do not sway me from my course. I will be content to adore the children of others, and smile with warmth and happiness when I see others wed. I may not be able to marry, but I will be able to perform the rites that join others in marriage perhaps. That, to me, is enough. More than enough. As for wealth... I have never needed nor wanted it.
Mistress Petal Penrose was kind enough to make me a robe for today's ceremony. I look forward to wearing it. I love the little fishes along the bottom. I am like a fish. Life is the stream, and I go with the current. They are also a perfect little nod to Mangata, whom I hold close in reverence in my heart. Each of the Gods, in their own way, resonate with me. While I will serve specifically in the capacity of Prelate of the Scholars of Vellichor, I hold a special place in my heart for each of the Gods.
It's time to start getting ready now, to get my affairs in order, and to prepare to say goodbye to the life I've known that I might welcome the new one. I have lingered maybe overlong on this journal entry. But I felt it important to get my thoughts written out, that I might never forget the feelings in my heart this day. Vellichor charged us with writing out our most important moments in the Whites, that they may never be forgotten. This is, probably, one of the most important days of my life. And so it is recorded.
Please note that the scholars may take some time preparing your journal for others to read.