Written By Natalia
Dec. 7, 2016, 9:58 a.m.(4/26/1005 AR)
Relationship Note on Sigurd
Cousin of Nadia, I am not sure if that makes us cousins as well. It is sometimes hard for me to keep straight who is what in my world and lineage once Grayson is removed from the last name.
He has the most wonderful of smiles and a great story. If you meet him, do ask him about honey.
He has the most wonderful of smiles and a great story. If you meet him, do ask him about honey.
Written By Natalia
Dec. 6, 2016, 5:58 p.m.(4/24/1005 AR)
Relationship Note on Cara
Well this is an interesting turn of events. Good for you, Lady Ashford.
Written By Natalia
Dec. 6, 2016, 8:41 a.m.(4/22/1005 AR)
Relationship Note on Juliet
I have never had a sister of the blood. In fact, I would caution to say that I might not have many true friends. It is the manner of politics. This is one that I consider more than a friend, but a sister. I wish nothing but good things in her life for her. I know that her heart will find where it needs to be and that the person it finds should consider themselves lucky beyond words.
Written By Natalia
Dec. 6, 2016, 8:39 a.m.(4/22/1005 AR)
Relationship Note on Dagon
It is released that we are to be wed. There is still much to do, but I suppose I could speak more on my thoughts about him. I find Dagon Thrax to be a man worthy of my respect as well as one that I am happy to spend my next years with as his wife. May the Gods watch over him and bless us.
Written By Natalia
Dec. 5, 2016, 6:06 p.m.(4/21/1005 AR)
So it is known now to everyone that I am to be wed. It has perhaps been the worst kept secret anyways.
Written By Natalia
Dec. 5, 2016, 4:53 a.m.(4/19/1005 AR)
I find myself not feeling overly well. It has meant that I am spending more time at Illusions. I'm sure it will pass.
Written By Natalia
Dec. 2, 2016, 6:22 a.m.(4/10/1005 AR)
Fuck.
Nothing more, that pretty much explains it all.
Nothing more, that pretty much explains it all.
Written By Natalia
Nov. 27, 2016, 1:26 a.m.(3/23/1005 AR)
Relationship Note on Tristan
Good For You.
Written By Natalia
Nov. 25, 2016, 10:08 a.m.(3/18/1005 AR)
Relationship Note on Edain
I wish there was more I could do or say to convey just how much it means to me. I am good at using words, but sometimes even I am rendered speechless.
Thank you for being you.
Thank you for being you.
Written By Natalia
Nov. 25, 2016, 10:07 a.m.(3/18/1005 AR)
Relationship Note on Leola
The animal handler is a bit shy perhaps, but she comes out of her shell. I am happy that she seems happy to see me. Funny what being nice does, yes? I am happy to recommend her to any and all that have questions about beasts. I am glad that she is in the city.
Written By Natalia
Nov. 25, 2016, 10:05 a.m.(3/18/1005 AR)
Relationship Note on Anze
Tea could have been called for a different reason, but I thank you for listening and understanding my points as well.
Written By Natalia
Nov. 25, 2016, 10:05 a.m.(3/18/1005 AR)
Relationship Note on Fergus
You are welcome for all the points to ponder.
Written By Natalia
Nov. 24, 2016, 12:12 a.m.(3/13/1005 AR)
I wonder if anyone has ever had a situation that they are just not sure how to deal with? Like that moment that you are in it and thinking how surreal it is and how there is nothing to combat it.
I have been asked many times why I want to meet with people. I have been watched with skeptical eyes for each of these meetings. Or asked why I am helping one person. What I am trying to gain.
It is truly frustrating. Graysons are adventurers. I am not skilled in tactic or war or really even scouting. My adventures are not something that will bring heroics to my name; and truly I am fine with that. However, I am so vastly interested in everything about a person. Not just a secret or how to use them. They are people. I like to know what they love doing. What motivates them to succeed. What they worry about. If they need help in some area that I can provide or know where to direct them to someone who can.
I was asked recently what angle I was working. When I swore there was none. That I was giving my honesty in that I just wanted to help and learn about people; they called bullshit and told me I was a liar.
There are things I have errored in and people's truths I took as truth when perhaps they were not. Perhaps my guilt in that is in that I trusted people I should not have trusted. This has made me realize two things, one must strive very hard not to become bitter and see shadows all around them. Also, when you error, no one will help you learn. They will just condemn you and point the finger and tell you how you are wrong. How you were misled and foolish. They do not say that they understand how you could be misled. They do not give you what the actual truth is, even when you beg for it. I am not sure how I feel about this.
I am also not sure how you respond when you are telling the truth and they are calling you a liar. I have done one thing since my first day in the city that has never changed. I have taken tea with everyone. Ask around. Most will tell you I have met with them. They will probably tell you that I took an interest in their life and if you continue to actually ask around; you will find I have not used their information against them. If anything, I have tried to offer support or direction when I can. I have been open with my heart, with my coin and with my time. So what else must I do for these naysayers to finally stop telling me I am lying when I am telling the truth?
What do you do when you are not lying on intention and being told you are? There is never a way to speak against it; but I believe my actions in general have spoken. When confused, I have even sought answers and said I did not know what to do. Some helped. I adore them. Most... most just offer insult when I need clarification.
Maybe this is a bad idea to post in a journal that shows my actual thoughts, but I am not just a Princess of Grayson. I am a girl. I am someone who has lost their family, buried parents, lost a brother in a different way and have been at times misled by people that I sought to trust. I am still a person. I think perhaps people refuse to see that about their fellow men and women. We are, when stripped bare of title and birthright, only human. Perhaps more understanding and love and willingness to share over questioning intent, bitterness, fear and such could go a long way.
I have been asked many times why I want to meet with people. I have been watched with skeptical eyes for each of these meetings. Or asked why I am helping one person. What I am trying to gain.
It is truly frustrating. Graysons are adventurers. I am not skilled in tactic or war or really even scouting. My adventures are not something that will bring heroics to my name; and truly I am fine with that. However, I am so vastly interested in everything about a person. Not just a secret or how to use them. They are people. I like to know what they love doing. What motivates them to succeed. What they worry about. If they need help in some area that I can provide or know where to direct them to someone who can.
I was asked recently what angle I was working. When I swore there was none. That I was giving my honesty in that I just wanted to help and learn about people; they called bullshit and told me I was a liar.
There are things I have errored in and people's truths I took as truth when perhaps they were not. Perhaps my guilt in that is in that I trusted people I should not have trusted. This has made me realize two things, one must strive very hard not to become bitter and see shadows all around them. Also, when you error, no one will help you learn. They will just condemn you and point the finger and tell you how you are wrong. How you were misled and foolish. They do not say that they understand how you could be misled. They do not give you what the actual truth is, even when you beg for it. I am not sure how I feel about this.
I am also not sure how you respond when you are telling the truth and they are calling you a liar. I have done one thing since my first day in the city that has never changed. I have taken tea with everyone. Ask around. Most will tell you I have met with them. They will probably tell you that I took an interest in their life and if you continue to actually ask around; you will find I have not used their information against them. If anything, I have tried to offer support or direction when I can. I have been open with my heart, with my coin and with my time. So what else must I do for these naysayers to finally stop telling me I am lying when I am telling the truth?
What do you do when you are not lying on intention and being told you are? There is never a way to speak against it; but I believe my actions in general have spoken. When confused, I have even sought answers and said I did not know what to do. Some helped. I adore them. Most... most just offer insult when I need clarification.
Maybe this is a bad idea to post in a journal that shows my actual thoughts, but I am not just a Princess of Grayson. I am a girl. I am someone who has lost their family, buried parents, lost a brother in a different way and have been at times misled by people that I sought to trust. I am still a person. I think perhaps people refuse to see that about their fellow men and women. We are, when stripped bare of title and birthright, only human. Perhaps more understanding and love and willingness to share over questioning intent, bitterness, fear and such could go a long way.
Written By Natalia
Nov. 22, 2016, 10 p.m.(3/10/1005 AR)
Sometimes people just need to get gifts. Sometimes it is better to give gifts and picture the faces of the receivers.
Written By Natalia
Nov. 21, 2016, 2:29 a.m.(3/5/1005 AR)
It has occurred to me that I should work on my patience. I am not praying for patience though; we know how the Gods grant that.
Written By Natalia
Nov. 21, 2016, 2:25 a.m.(3/5/1005 AR)
Relationship Note on Jaenelle
You are too. I'm going to get Valerius involved in this one.
Written By Natalia
Nov. 21, 2016, 2:24 a.m.(3/5/1005 AR)
Relationship Note on Leo
I feel like you are ignoring my missives. Yes, you.
Written By Natalia
Nov. 20, 2016, 5:01 p.m.(3/4/1005 AR)
Relationship Note on Joscelin
Jeweler.
She is also the new guildmistress and all that comes with that added stress. I am not sure she realized that part of the station. While there have been bumps, I do believe that I would call her a friend.
She is also the new guildmistress and all that comes with that added stress. I am not sure she realized that part of the station. While there have been bumps, I do believe that I would call her a friend.
Written By Natalia
Nov. 20, 2016, 4:59 p.m.(3/4/1005 AR)
Relationship Note on Edain
I have found the High Lord to be what one might expect of him. He has been honest in giving me his truth and not to beat around the bush at all. I admire that in him. He does not enjoy that I call him the Hero High Lord, but in a world full of shadows; it is good there may be some light.
Written By Natalia
Nov. 20, 2016, 4:57 p.m.(3/4/1005 AR)
Relationship Note on Juliet
Ah, both the rose and the scandal. I believe that she loves both of these things. While she laid her confession at my feet, it was not a thing to truly feel guilt over. She amuses me and I have come to enjoy our conversations; when life is not pulling at us and people not calling our time away. Lady of Roses and Lady of Scandal, I believe she is what one thinks when they think of her people.
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