Written By Sabine
Aug. 31, 2020, 1:06 a.m.(12/9/1013 AR)
Two of Berenice's brood have been claimed, two yet remain. One goes, of course, to dear cousin Piccola, named Pony for her bewildering love of small horses. The second I send to Seraceni, there to rule the Lady Ophira, and I have named him Nox. It will not be difficult to understand why.
We shall hope the last two are soon claimed. They have taken a fascination of Nurie's strutting pigeon.
We shall hope the last two are soon claimed. They have taken a fascination of Nurie's strutting pigeon.
Written By Sabine
Aug. 21, 2020, 5:46 a.m.(11/17/1013 AR)
Berenice has outdone me again: I had one child, she has had four, and in their infant state they are slightly more endearing than my raging daughter. Three blue kittens, one black, each with crescents or sickles or splashes of white on them.
In a few short months, I shall have to decide their homes. How to determine who is deserving of the spawn of such a haughty queen? It will be something to consider.
In a few short months, I shall have to decide their homes. How to determine who is deserving of the spawn of such a haughty queen? It will be something to consider.
Written By Sabine
Aug. 14, 2020, 6:29 p.m.(11/4/1013 AR)
It would surprise some that I do not consider myself fortunate, or blessed. My holdings prosper, my people are safe and contented, my family thrives and increases. But these things occur in spite of misfortune. These things occur because I do not count on good to come, or for good to last. I could lose it all to fire, to poison, to invading blades-- I have, we have, throughout the years-- and I would build it up again.
Success is a target for misfortune. The more one has, the more can be taken away. The storm does not care that it lashes at a nest perched on a tree limb. It will rage whether the nest topples or not. Precarious or sheltered, the nest is always at risk.
What they have taught me, the storms that came before and those that come now, is that when it all crumbles, I persevere. In later years perhaps my children will read this entry, looking for some sign of love. Perhaps it will sting them to read and realize that if I lose them, I will carry on. But my hope for them is that they understand that this dedication to increase, to improvement, to survival and strengthening, is my gift to them. It can all be lost and it can all be gained again, and more. As I have this gift so too do they. To crave a mother's love does not matter when that mother might be taken away. Love is transient. To crave improvement... that is eternal, whether success comes or goes, whether misfortune strikes, no matter who falls.
This is one facet of the mirror's lesson.
Success is a target for misfortune. The more one has, the more can be taken away. The storm does not care that it lashes at a nest perched on a tree limb. It will rage whether the nest topples or not. Precarious or sheltered, the nest is always at risk.
What they have taught me, the storms that came before and those that come now, is that when it all crumbles, I persevere. In later years perhaps my children will read this entry, looking for some sign of love. Perhaps it will sting them to read and realize that if I lose them, I will carry on. But my hope for them is that they understand that this dedication to increase, to improvement, to survival and strengthening, is my gift to them. It can all be lost and it can all be gained again, and more. As I have this gift so too do they. To crave a mother's love does not matter when that mother might be taken away. Love is transient. To crave improvement... that is eternal, whether success comes or goes, whether misfortune strikes, no matter who falls.
This is one facet of the mirror's lesson.
Written By Sabine
Aug. 12, 2020, 1:50 a.m.(10/27/1013 AR)
Thank you to those who have sent well-wishes regarding the birth of my daughter. The nurses assure me she is a fine and healthy baby. Rather louder than her predecessor but within normal parameters for this stage. Certainly she has the temperament for the path I intend for her and what else is the role of sibling to the heir if not to occasionally challenge their patience, their peace? She will be a fine foil to Constantin, this furious little Ginevra.
Thank you also to my husband, whose patience and tolerance of the furor of her coming was unexpected but not unwelcome. He deserves whatever toasts he has earned from our peers.
Now, again, I may blessedly return to less messy business.
Thank you also to my husband, whose patience and tolerance of the furor of her coming was unexpected but not unwelcome. He deserves whatever toasts he has earned from our peers.
Now, again, I may blessedly return to less messy business.
Written By Sabine
Aug. 1, 2020, 7:03 p.m.(10/6/1013 AR)
As is common to her type, my cat Berenice has decided that now, while I nurture the second child of Tessere's next generation, is the perfect time in which to find a willing tom and cultivate a litter of kittens. She aims to overshadow my own delivery as it approaches, I have no doubt. When they are whelped, those who wish to adopt the spawn of a ruthlessly ambitious and social-climbing feline may send word to be placed on the list of prospects.
Do please include why you believe you are a suitable match to budding young tyrants, and how you intend to put them in their place to keep them in line.
Do please include why you believe you are a suitable match to budding young tyrants, and how you intend to put them in their place to keep them in line.
Written By Sabine
July 27, 2020, 4:32 p.m.(9/24/1013 AR)
Do please stop pestering the commoners. Let them have their spaces as we protect ours from their incursions. One would think a great many parents didn't contract etiquette tutors as they should have in a number of people's youths, the way certain parties behave. For those whose parents failed you, I say this: however subversive you believe yourself to be, there is no esteem in scuffing a kick at the lowest of the low. You look like a fool, and even domestic beasts have been known to turn on their masters. Iron-shod hooves and hunger-filed teeth can do as much damage as gold-chased blades, or a carefully placed dose of poison, my darlings.
Written By Sabine
July 23, 2020, 7:09 a.m.(9/15/1013 AR)
Relationship Note on Piccola
I wonder if she understands now why I summoned her back, she and her brother both. We are not a hawking family, but I do so enjoy watching someone fly when I cast them from my wrist.
Written By Sabine
July 23, 2020, 7:08 a.m.(9/15/1013 AR)
Relationship Note on Gaspar
No one, the gods included, will be surprised that I record this here: I am not a woman given to sentiment.
I place that statement beside this one, to be preserved for history's sake: I had no intention of marrying again and yet do not regret-- for once-- the act of changing my mind. My first husband was my mother's choice, my second necessity's. Both died to violence. These events did not endear me to the state of matrimony; I would prefer my reputation be other than a bloody widow. When set on a course, I but rarely turn from it. I had no intention of taking a third husband. Since binding Gaspar to me as consort, as Marquis, as bridegroom, I have learned that there are times when doubling back on a decision has merit. If we prosper now, with trade diminished and threats clotting thickly around, it is because he has set his mind and will to the benefit of my holdings. More than that, my Nurie sings in her workroom, I have caught the servants smiling, and when he answers their salutes, my guards stand with greater pride. I even spied Cosimo nodding to him, once, and that is no small thing (though not yet Piccola; still, I expect even she will eventually succumb). With some born to royalty comes a certain grace. Not all, but some.
I am not a woman given to sentiment. I believe when sentiment is stripped from a thing, the truth shines through. It was the right choice, to marry again, because I chose to marry this man. He brings us grace.
I place that statement beside this one, to be preserved for history's sake: I had no intention of marrying again and yet do not regret-- for once-- the act of changing my mind. My first husband was my mother's choice, my second necessity's. Both died to violence. These events did not endear me to the state of matrimony; I would prefer my reputation be other than a bloody widow. When set on a course, I but rarely turn from it. I had no intention of taking a third husband. Since binding Gaspar to me as consort, as Marquis, as bridegroom, I have learned that there are times when doubling back on a decision has merit. If we prosper now, with trade diminished and threats clotting thickly around, it is because he has set his mind and will to the benefit of my holdings. More than that, my Nurie sings in her workroom, I have caught the servants smiling, and when he answers their salutes, my guards stand with greater pride. I even spied Cosimo nodding to him, once, and that is no small thing (though not yet Piccola; still, I expect even she will eventually succumb). With some born to royalty comes a certain grace. Not all, but some.
I am not a woman given to sentiment. I believe when sentiment is stripped from a thing, the truth shines through. It was the right choice, to marry again, because I chose to marry this man. He brings us grace.
Written By Sabine
July 23, 2020, 6:48 a.m.(9/15/1013 AR)
We cannot control the weather. What profit then to spend breath in lament of heat or storm, lack of rain, destructive frost? It avails a person nothing, from king to serf, to shake a fist at the sky when they might instead turn to what can be done. This is why, for king or serf, it is always best to have several plans in action. Not on paper, not in mind, but several in movement. As one meets a slight with dignity and a long memory, so too one must meet those events over which we have little to no control.
So, it is with great dignity, and a long memory, I announce my pregnancy and tell you, child, I have a number of plans already in action for your future. And I will remember the torments you have visited upon me already; your stubborn insistence, even in the womb, of proving yourself distinct from your elder brother and future liege.
So, it is with great dignity, and a long memory, I announce my pregnancy and tell you, child, I have a number of plans already in action for your future. And I will remember the torments you have visited upon me already; your stubborn insistence, even in the womb, of proving yourself distinct from your elder brother and future liege.
Written By Sabine
July 15, 2020, 4:02 p.m.(8/28/1013 AR)
Quarterly reports have arrived from Iriscal and all is well. The mulberry trees thrive, the silk worms feast, and our apprentices flourish-- particularly the silk pickers, whose job is one of the most difficult. Not the dyers, or the weavers, but they who must plunge the cocoons into boiling water and then find the end of the thread laid by the sleepy worm, to smoothly unravel the whole into a single unbroken piece. None have eyes so sharp or hands so steady as a silk picker. Were they not artists, they would be deadly archers.
So few understand that silk begins with death. It is the Wheel writ in miniature, the cycle of the worms, but controlled by us rather than the greater world. Even the cocoon baskets, after the worms have eaten their fill, are shaped to mimic the Wheel. They're hatched, they feast, they spin themselves their bed upon the circle we provide them...
And then we plunge them into hot water, and unravel the work they laboured so mightily upon in life. There's a lesson in this, I think.
Silkworm husks, it should be stated, the bodies they leave behind, make excellent fertilizer.
So few understand that silk begins with death. It is the Wheel writ in miniature, the cycle of the worms, but controlled by us rather than the greater world. Even the cocoon baskets, after the worms have eaten their fill, are shaped to mimic the Wheel. They're hatched, they feast, they spin themselves their bed upon the circle we provide them...
And then we plunge them into hot water, and unravel the work they laboured so mightily upon in life. There's a lesson in this, I think.
Silkworm husks, it should be stated, the bodies they leave behind, make excellent fertilizer.
Written By Sabine
July 5, 2020, 6:03 a.m.(8/7/1013 AR)
The Dark Queen, the Bright Mirror and the Silken Prince.
They are the jewels of our March, these caravels, the physical manifestation of our dreams. Here I record my gratitude to my husband for the first two, and the Archduchess-Regent and her Voices for the last. Velenosa is not only liege, and ally, but friend and in this friendship, we will all profit. In land, in wealth, in prestige. With these three, we will lay claim to history; we will return and restore what was once lost; we will return light and life to darkness and ruin.
They are the jewels of our March, these caravels, the physical manifestation of our dreams. Here I record my gratitude to my husband for the first two, and the Archduchess-Regent and her Voices for the last. Velenosa is not only liege, and ally, but friend and in this friendship, we will all profit. In land, in wealth, in prestige. With these three, we will lay claim to history; we will return and restore what was once lost; we will return light and life to darkness and ruin.
Written By Sabine
July 4, 2020, 6:31 a.m.(8/5/1013 AR)
I have high hopes for this marriage. Let us pray that those forces which have seen me widowed twice over agree with me.
The ceremony was my largest wedding to date and everything I had planned for. Father Aureth is a natural orator, truly a man capable of commanding a crowd-- a necessary feat, given the setting. I thank those who came to witness the event but I thank this gentleman particularly for his generosity in giving his time. In return, we shall see if we can outdo our last generous donation to the Faith. To my guests, it pleased me to see you, and I thank you for your time and yours gifts. May I prove worthy of them.
To she who designed our rings: you have my gratitude, always.
I must also thank my family. Cosimo, for attending when I know he would rather be in his library. Piccola, for attending when I know she would rather be with her horses. Even Cousin Reve, who understood that yelling like a common creature across a crowded shrine is something I would dislike intensely, yet did so anyway.
Nurie... but Nurie knows what is in my heart, for she is my heart. If others speak of our wedding, it will be due to her craft and care.
It was little Lord Constantin's first official duty by bearing the rings to the altar. He performed to expectation, though we must polish that bow. It has been relayed to me that he earned a great many compliments but as he grows they will be fewer, and he must do more to earn them. Still, I thank my heir for seeing to his duty as best he was able.
And, of course, my thanks to my new husband. For his loyalty, for his charm, for his dedication to my causes, in all of their variety. I trust him to see to the welfare of my people as I have done, though perhaps not always in my manner. But that is to their benefit as well.
The ceremony was my largest wedding to date and everything I had planned for. Father Aureth is a natural orator, truly a man capable of commanding a crowd-- a necessary feat, given the setting. I thank those who came to witness the event but I thank this gentleman particularly for his generosity in giving his time. In return, we shall see if we can outdo our last generous donation to the Faith. To my guests, it pleased me to see you, and I thank you for your time and yours gifts. May I prove worthy of them.
To she who designed our rings: you have my gratitude, always.
I must also thank my family. Cosimo, for attending when I know he would rather be in his library. Piccola, for attending when I know she would rather be with her horses. Even Cousin Reve, who understood that yelling like a common creature across a crowded shrine is something I would dislike intensely, yet did so anyway.
Nurie... but Nurie knows what is in my heart, for she is my heart. If others speak of our wedding, it will be due to her craft and care.
It was little Lord Constantin's first official duty by bearing the rings to the altar. He performed to expectation, though we must polish that bow. It has been relayed to me that he earned a great many compliments but as he grows they will be fewer, and he must do more to earn them. Still, I thank my heir for seeing to his duty as best he was able.
And, of course, my thanks to my new husband. For his loyalty, for his charm, for his dedication to my causes, in all of their variety. I trust him to see to the welfare of my people as I have done, though perhaps not always in my manner. But that is to their benefit as well.
Written By Sabine
June 21, 2020, 3:11 p.m.(7/8/1013 AR)
Relationship Note on Vanora
It would be far more noteworthy were I not of the South, one expects, even so far north of the South as we are in Iriscal. Thank you.
Written By Sabine
June 20, 2020, 4:25 a.m.(7/5/1013 AR)
Of all the skills most valuable that I've learned through the years, it is temperance which has most preserved me. Some would be aghast to hear a Lycene confess to such but it is true-- for what is temperance but discipline? When one looks deep into the mirror, unflinching in their regard, the flaws seen must be recognized, they must be understood and then they may be used. They are tools, the same as our given or cultivated virtues. But they outdo our virtues in strength: they are more slippery, less willing to be bound. One must master them. For that... temperance. Discipline. The ability to look calmly ahead and draw back on the reins, to consider which tool is best used in any given situation, or if a response is needed at all.
A lovely side effect of achieving discipline is patience, you see. With patience, a problem often resolves itself... or him, or herself, at that.
The Peers of Arx are in great need of mirrors, though mirrors profit nothing without the courage to look into one's own eyes, to contemplate what is revealed there.
A lovely side effect of achieving discipline is patience, you see. With patience, a problem often resolves itself... or him, or herself, at that.
The Peers of Arx are in great need of mirrors, though mirrors profit nothing without the courage to look into one's own eyes, to contemplate what is revealed there.
Written By Sabine
May 31, 2020, 6:07 p.m.(5/22/1013 AR)
Relationship Note on Piccola
My cousin will soon learn that I have not yet been proven wrong in my assessment of others. However strange it must seem to her to be here, to be immersed in this tangle of threads, I expect she will quickly adapt and thrive. I don't choose carelessly and she has already begun to prove me correct.
Written By Sabine
May 11, 2020, 5:50 p.m.(4/10/1013 AR)
Relationship Note on Gaspar
Accusations of love matches have flown fast and thick of late. With the declaration of betrothal to Prince Gaspar recently made, it seems appropriate to state for the formal record that love was not a factor in my proposal. Once again I marry for reasons other than affection. Three reasons, in fact:
The first, to cement our loyalty to Velenosa, so it may never be in question, whatever comes.
The second and third are the matched pair of caravels he gifted Tessere as a gift of courtship. The Dark Queen and Bright Mirror stand-- float?-- as proof of his devotion to our betterment.
He is a worthy Prince. He will be a worthy Consort. A fortunate match, as most of mine have been. Excepting the previous deaths, of course. We shall pray he defies that trend.
The first, to cement our loyalty to Velenosa, so it may never be in question, whatever comes.
The second and third are the matched pair of caravels he gifted Tessere as a gift of courtship. The Dark Queen and Bright Mirror stand-- float?-- as proof of his devotion to our betterment.
He is a worthy Prince. He will be a worthy Consort. A fortunate match, as most of mine have been. Excepting the previous deaths, of course. We shall pray he defies that trend.
Written By Sabine
Feb. 21, 2020, 5:26 p.m.(10/18/1012 AR)
There was a time when nothing would stay my hand against those who threatened my interests. Perhaps it is Nurie's influence, or motherhood has made me sentimental. I have never considered it weakness to take my time in making a decision. But this feels more like hesitation than consideration.
In other news we have returned from Iriscal. I gave my people a week of festivities and celebration. The week was concluded with a ceremony in which the family dedicated ourselves to the future welfare and well-being of the March. Ceremony has its place but this ran deeper. The bond I have always felt to protect and improve has been formalized. The conduct of my entire life has been made real, before witnesses, not just for me but for all.
It is possible to be so bound and to find freedom in the bond.
In other news we have returned from Iriscal. I gave my people a week of festivities and celebration. The week was concluded with a ceremony in which the family dedicated ourselves to the future welfare and well-being of the March. Ceremony has its place but this ran deeper. The bond I have always felt to protect and improve has been formalized. The conduct of my entire life has been made real, before witnesses, not just for me but for all.
It is possible to be so bound and to find freedom in the bond.
Written By Sabine
Feb. 11, 2020, 11:05 p.m.(9.924024057539683/31.74534722222222/1012.7436686714616 AR)
We depart soon for a festival in Iriscal, a week of celebration and giving thanks for our success, our prosperity. Iriscal, the March once again. Constantin will be presented to his people for the first time as their future Marquis. Cosimo will have to make a speech, and Nurie will have her first public appearance as one of my ministers. There will be frolicking... there had better be frolicking, for how much silver this costs me. A worthwhile investment but an expensive one.
Would that I left Arx smiling but I find myself incapable of late. I am triumphant... but I cannot celebrate. I have no words to describe this mood I've fallen into. The only words I have are "I do not like this". And I don't.
Would that I left Arx smiling but I find myself incapable of late. I am triumphant... but I cannot celebrate. I have no words to describe this mood I've fallen into. The only words I have are "I do not like this". And I don't.
Written By Sabine
Oct. 18, 2019, 5:12 a.m.(1/14/1012 AR)
Relationship Note on Berenice
I have been fortunate in my patronage by the Princess Berenice. I came to Arx with the foundation of my House and family rocked by my mother's death, our name still tarnished. I knew her first as a young girl, driven, energetic, claws sharp but still endearingly clumsy. I was her senior in so many ways-- age, beauty, suitors and eventually, in rule. Naturally, I inspired her in her own climb, from girl to glorious, and I am grateful for the support she has given me in turn, from Countess to Marquessa.
It took a challenge of honour to secure her patronage-- she does know how I enjoy a good challenge, so invested in the delights of others is our sweet Berenice-- but what began with spectacle ends now with the deepest of respect and bonds of eternal friendship forged.
It took a challenge of honour to secure her patronage-- she does know how I enjoy a good challenge, so invested in the delights of others is our sweet Berenice-- but what began with spectacle ends now with the deepest of respect and bonds of eternal friendship forged.
Written By Sabine
Sept. 19, 2019, 7:27 p.m.(11/12/1011 AR)
To those who have offered me congratulations, I thank you. It is a satisfactory thing, to celebrate one's success with well-wishers. Tessere's redemption is a labour which has been centuries in the making. To be the one fortunate enough to complete that effort and reap the rewards of it... I am content. At least for now, for there is ever more work to be done. I pray, wherever Karadoc tarries, he has some hint of the success he contributed to while he was still among us. I pray he too is satisfied.
I offer my own thanks to my liege lady, the Duchess Calista. Her vision for her lands matches my own. Her commitment to improvement and excellence, it is a match for my own. I am fortunate that she saw the merits of raising Iriscal to its rightful place once more.
Now I may turn with a clear mind and a lightened heart to the task of creating the finest fabric Arvum has ever produced: a weave to rival the protection granted by steelsilk or fireweave. And thanks Archduchess Regent, her highness Jaenelle Velenosa, I may have struck on new inspiration for that undertaking.
I offer my own thanks to my liege lady, the Duchess Calista. Her vision for her lands matches my own. Her commitment to improvement and excellence, it is a match for my own. I am fortunate that she saw the merits of raising Iriscal to its rightful place once more.
Now I may turn with a clear mind and a lightened heart to the task of creating the finest fabric Arvum has ever produced: a weave to rival the protection granted by steelsilk or fireweave. And thanks Archduchess Regent, her highness Jaenelle Velenosa, I may have struck on new inspiration for that undertaking.
Please note that the scholars may take some time preparing your journal for others to read.