Written By Raven
Jan. 31, 2024, 9:42 p.m.(8/27/1021 AR)
Thank the gods for another fucking dawn. Now to sleep for a week.
Written By Raven
Jan. 28, 2024, 10:48 p.m.(8/21/1021 AR)
Thank you to all who stood in defense of Setarco. Thank you to Lord Giorgio Proscipi. I did not know you well but I will make sure that Setarco never forgets you
Written By Raven
Jan. 28, 2024, 1:56 a.m.(8/19/1021 AR)
It is maddening to be on the front lines and watch those I am meant to protect get wounded or fall and I keep coming away unscathed. It feels as if somehow I am not trying hard enough. I know it's blind luck but it's still hard to swallow.
Written By Raven
Jan. 26, 2024, 10:18 p.m.(8/17/1021 AR)
It's nice to know the unfortunate circumstances of my crossing hasn't interfered with my ability to help those who ask me for help. More luck a fucking relief. I know it's childish I worry over such quibbles when we're in the second reckoning but those I care about will always be the center of my reality.
Written By Raven
Jan. 21, 2024, 8:02 p.m.(8/7/1021 AR)
Someone come chat theology with me
Written By Raven
Jan. 21, 2024, 2:31 p.m.(8/6/1021 AR)
If everyone's an asshole, I might be the problem. Everyone's right. I'm arrogant. I'm stubborn. I'm an opinionated, pushy loudmouth. Yet I am coming to realize of the many occasions where I was in the wrong, my sin isn't always how I am, or even who I am. Sometimes it was the when. Time. That's my sin. The squawking when I ought to be have been quiet or silence when I should have stood up. Does it mean really my sin is lack of wisdom? Probably.
Either way while I will never be too proud to apologize or admit my errors I am done apologizing for who, for who I am. Archfiends. Heralds. The dream and the nightmare. I will walk it and I will face it as myself. The causes I serve, the forces and people I serve I will remain loyal to but first I must be loyal to myself.
When I take my soulbrand I will do it entirely as myself. For good or for ill the only power I will call on or rely on will be my own. If this means I am somehow less than I might have been had I borrowed or called power from elsewhere I will still have no regret because so long as I succeed or fail on my own merits I know that my choices will always be my own and that means nothing will sway me from keeping the promises I've made to myself and others. I will remain whole, unbowed, unbroken. Imperfect but free to strive to become who I mean to be. Everyone and anything else who feels entitled to a say can fuck right off.
Either way while I will never be too proud to apologize or admit my errors I am done apologizing for who, for who I am. Archfiends. Heralds. The dream and the nightmare. I will walk it and I will face it as myself. The causes I serve, the forces and people I serve I will remain loyal to but first I must be loyal to myself.
When I take my soulbrand I will do it entirely as myself. For good or for ill the only power I will call on or rely on will be my own. If this means I am somehow less than I might have been had I borrowed or called power from elsewhere I will still have no regret because so long as I succeed or fail on my own merits I know that my choices will always be my own and that means nothing will sway me from keeping the promises I've made to myself and others. I will remain whole, unbowed, unbroken. Imperfect but free to strive to become who I mean to be. Everyone and anything else who feels entitled to a say can fuck right off.
Written By Raven
Jan. 15, 2024, 5:20 p.m.(7/23/1021 AR)
Thank gods I the Blackheart blade is back in my hand. Bad enough I felt naked without it but to have to make my last stand without it just didn't feel right.
Written By Raven
Jan. 14, 2024, 10:35 p.m.(7/21/1021 AR)
I am paying now for not devoting more time prior to unraveling the enigmas that plague me. So much for tunnel vision.
Written By Raven
Jan. 14, 2024, 10:06 p.m.(7/21/1021 AR)
so I don't know if the vision was a warning or trolling. I know only my fate is mine to choose. I wish I had addressed the exorcism and the crossing before now.
Written By Raven
Jan. 7, 2024, 9:57 p.m.(7/7/1021 AR)
I have never truly been alone. Not really. Soon there will be at least two trials I must face which some part of it I must do on my own-but I am glad even so I won't have to do either alone.
Written By Raven
Dec. 31, 2023, 6:28 p.m.(6/21/1021 AR)
I'd like to thank all those who challenge me to do better. Or at least to improve my skill if not my person.
Written By Raven
Dec. 30, 2023, 10:25 p.m.(6/19/1021 AR)
The Compact is truly lucky to have the Pathfinder as well as so many who have long served the gods, the crown, their houses. It was helpful to hear the experiences of so many and to have collective wisdom on tap. Unrelated noted I've been trying to be on my best behavior with mixed results. It could be maybe I am not cut out for civilized life but I will keep trying.
Written By Raven
Dec. 29, 2023, 11:08 a.m.(6/16/1021 AR)
It's good to see so many wise, dedicated people come into their own. People who multitudes of people including yours truly have turned to time again for guidance and assistance. As an urchin in the streets of Setarco it seemed like the worse you were the higher you could make it like a turd floating to the top. Seeing the scions of the compact themselves having someone to turn to for mentoring and guidance has restored my faith in the balance of things.
Written By Raven
Dec. 24, 2023, 10:48 p.m.(6/7/1021 AR)
Thank the gods that the Traitor is gone. It looks as if there may be a lot of work to do still from the chat I had with the Archscholar. I am glad he's whole. How he stays in such fair spirits I'll never know.
Written By Raven
Dec. 23, 2023, 3:13 p.m.(6/4/1021 AR)
I hope you choke on it you insecure man-child.
Written By Raven
Dec. 17, 2023, 10:57 p.m.(5/21/1021 AR)
My prayers are with all those who are the places I cannot be, tending things I cannot do-we each have our part. If it seems like I don't care-maybe it's just that I am only one person and can only do so much at once. Not that I don't care.
Written By Raven
Dec. 17, 2023, 6:44 p.m.(5/21/1021 AR)
It is absolutely nonsense that there's occasions I want things deeply for myself but am not selfish enough to take them for myself just because being selfish would be counter toward the goals I've worked so long and so hard. If only there was a means to smother the selfish want and be rid of it. Alas, this is now how being human works.
Written By Raven
Dec. 7, 2023, 2:57 p.m.(4/28/1021 AR)
Information should be helpful. Provide direction. Why is it every time I learn something new I somehow feel even MORE at a loss? Knowledge is an illusion and certainty is just proof you don't have the fool picture yet. I need a better word than fuck.
Written By Raven
Dec. 6, 2023, 9:34 p.m.(4/27/1021 AR)
Feel like I've reached a dead end but I can't give up. I can only pray the others are having better luck than I am.
Written By Raven
Dec. 2, 2023, 11:43 p.m.(4/19/1021 AR)
For all those facing thornweave or venturing into ancient shardhavens. May the blessed Thirteen gods be with you and see you safely returned. For everyone who love those brave few, give the gods your prayers and those brave souls your support.
Please note that the scholars may take some time preparing your journal for others to read.