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Written By Mason

Jan. 12, 2017, 4 p.m.(8/22/1005 AR)

Relationship Note on Dawn

This whole mess has leaved some very disturbing connotations with me, and things I can't seem to shake.

And I don't know whether or not it was her intention. Asking for a vote, and the vote or choice doesn't even matter, doing the very thing that was being discussed. If that was the case, why even have a gathering of the council, what was the point if you were just going to do it anyways?

Make no mistake, I believed the Tiend was the right choice, but how Dawn went about it, accusing people of not holding to their word and then she goes out and breaks her's. I don't understand. Is there a story that we don't know? Is there something that we should know? What more isn't being said and more importantly, /why/ isn't it being said?

She had put everything on the Tiend being completed. Enough to throw a sham of an Assembly of Peers and a vote that didn't matter. And when she says that she will be one of the sacrifices, she doesn't even go through with it herself like she said she would. I don't say that because I wanted her to die. Fact is, I would've rather not anyone had to. Enough people are going to die in the coming days, months, and likely years.

But when you're the only one that returns. Left with with twenty-one people. Only two return. I assume that thirteen of them are dead through the ritual. What happened to the others? Why are you still alive? And what made you decide to sacrifice Lady Darkwater instead of yourself, since you seemed to be so willing to throw yourself on the sword of martyrdom but then couldn't go throw with the act?

I don't want to think these thoughts, I don't want to accuse like this. Blazing sands, I gave my daughter's middle name in honor of you. But all of us, especially the Darkwaters deserve answers. And these last months, you have shut out just about everyone.

I wish I knew why. I wish I didn't think of you like I do now. And I wish, more than the rest, that you would tell us why.

Written By Mason

Jan. 11, 2017, 1:40 p.m.(8/19/1005 AR)

I have done it. After a long time of toil and labor, I have constructed something that I believe will allow us to share to information with each other much better among one another.

A catalog, a guidebook, a reference guide to everything I have learned, sought, researched and information shared. Through my years in Eurus to my time in Arvum. When someone comes to me, seeking knowledge or information, I need only share with them this tome.

It is my hope, my goal, that this will make knowledge shared easier. That some of us, who hold such knowledge, secrets and dark things, it should not be kept hidden from the world, like so many things seem to be or have been done from those who oppose us. It needs, should be brought to light. The more we all know, the better armed we all are.

As people come to me, share their knowledge, the tome will grow as information increases. My skill with a sword is...middling at best. This may perhaps be the greatest weapon I have ever constructed. A weapon of knowledge and of old lore, history, and bits and pieces of lost information that we have been hampered from knowing.

Except for the birth of Safiyyah, this is perhaps my greatest work to date thus far.

Written By Mason

Jan. 7, 2017, 2:40 a.m.(8/5/1005 AR)

Relationship Note on Lou

It has been some time since Lou left for Bastion to take a hunting trip to 'clear her head' from the combination of being Voice and from carrying our daughter. I know things had been strained during her time helping Grayson as much as she could, but I also know that life was one she was suited to. She was more akin to travelling, exploring, delving into dark depths and finding secrets await to be uncovered.

She took the post because she is nothing if not loyal to her family. A quality I find admirable. In the same token, it put a certain strain on our marriage that I wasn't quite expecting. She talked little, slept a great deal and after Safiyyah was born, seemed to want little to do with being mother. She decided at that point, that getting out of Arx was the best thing for her, and returning to Bastion for spell was the solution.

I stayed behind, to continue my own work and research and take care of Safi. For some time I found myself stretched tighter and tighter, like a sheet of cloth pulled at every end and ready to rip. And I felt, there was a moment with resignation of Dawn from the Regency that fabric was going to rip entirely. Were it not for the actions of a dear friend, I would've found myself very much alone.

And then, the next day, like a blessing, a reward from mighty Ahj'on himself, what appeared on my doorstep, holding Safiyyah as if she never left, was Lou. Refreshed, reinvigorated and ready to face things anew. I had not expected such a change in my wife, but she was different. She seemed to care more, express herself more and generally seemed to be happy. She even said these things herself. Much to my amazement, these were rarely things Lou spoke of aloud, even to me.

It is good to have her back, I will not lie, I found things to be a bit more empty while she was gone. Things were less rewarding, less fulfilling without her quiet support. And now things seem different, but perhaps better than they were previously

She wishes to speak to Aislin, to step in and help in the role she was given within the Society. For that I'm grateful. And for the first time ever, ever since coming to Arx, I have sensation that we will approach and work on our projects together, as a team. As we once did in wilds.

It's a good feeling. And it was only when I saw her face was that I realized how much I had noted just how pale life had seemed.

That all said, I will not sit here and gush and flout frilly, pretty things about my wife. I feel to do otherwise would be an insult to others reading this and I don't have any desire to make anyone roll their eyes. Or perhaps excuse themselves to throw up into the nearest potted plant.

Simply put, I have missed her and I am glad to have her returned.

Written By Mason

Jan. 6, 2017, 12:56 a.m.(8/2/1005 AR)

There would have been rolling heads in the Sultan's palace had what happened tonight occurred in Ahj'on. I'm not really quite sure what to make of it.

It's easy to stick your heads in the sand and demand that you have questions that need to be answered. There are enemies at your very gates and people would rather bicker and complain with each other than actually do something about it.

I'm not sure what to weep for me more. The fact that we may already of handed over our lives to coming darkness or the fact that they likely played us so well into doing so ourselves.

Time will tell, I suppose.

Written By Mason

Jan. 3, 2017, 2:20 a.m.(7/21/1005 AR)

Relationship Note on Calypso

I'm sorry, my friend. These were not things I wished to tell you, but they were things you deserved to hear.

And now you know. I hope in time, that you will forgive me for telling them to you. And that you will eventually understand why I said what I did.

It is a burden, but it is a burden I believed you are more than capable of carrying. That is how deep my respect goes for your talents.

We will need leaders in the coming days, in the future. And a General cannot lead without the weapon of knowledge at her fingers.

That all said, forgive me what I have placed upon you.

Written By Mason

Jan. 1, 2017, 12:56 a.m.(7/15/1005 AR)

Relationship Note on Calypso

I find myself becoming good friends with General, even if it seems like she takes personal lengths to keep most people at arm's reach. Which is fine, everyone has their personal space, but while we may not have a great deal in common, what is the idea of learning as much as we can, when can.

I owe her a talk at some point regarding some particular stories. I feel she has earned that much from me.

That will be a long talk. I hope will be prepared to hear what I have to say.

Written By Mason

Jan. 1, 2017, 12:54 a.m.(7/15/1005 AR)

Relationship Note on Eirene

If there's any one person I wish to strive towards besting in a spar one day, it's Lady Eirene. We've sparred a couple of times, and every time I think I'm getting better, relearning the lessons I had forgotten as a boy in Ahj'on, she's there to remind me that I have such a ways to go. The day that I'm finally able to get the upper hand I know I'll have reached a milestone.

Perhaps I will never be as skilled as her or anyone else, I may of passed the proper time to learn when it was best suited to me. But for all her gruffness, I enjoy her company.

Written By Mason

Jan. 1, 2017, 12:51 a.m.(7/15/1005 AR)

Relationship Note on Juliet

She's an absolute joy to have around. And I have not seen someone take to handing a child as well as she did. I should thank her, I feel like if it was not for her timely arrival and swooped in to help a child that might've started crying, I would've had my hands full.

It was good to simply, talk. Not about world shaking events or dark terrors on the horizon. Just talking. It was a massive relief to me.

Should do that more often, I think. Her stories are colorful, to say the least. I think she'll make a wonderful unofficial aunt to Safi.

Written By Mason

Dec. 25, 2016, 6:22 p.m.(6/24/1005 AR)

I had no idea that infants could reach such distance when spitting up.

Also, a full nights sleep. I have taken advantage of that for so long and never thought about what it would be like losing it. I am now so very sorry for taking that for granted.

I feel like I can handle demons much better than a screaming infant. And oh my, Safiyyah has some lungs on her.

Written By Mason

Dec. 24, 2016, 11:54 p.m.(6/22/1005 AR)

I have sent a letter to the Minister of Defense, detailing to him what I wrote to Aislin. He seemed to be...moved what I had written.

Then I met Calypso and Eirene in the stacks at the Archives, discussing more matters with them. Nothing seems to get much better, and I feel at times I'm treading water. An irony, coming from a man who was born in a desert.

It would be nice, I should say, if for once, that whenever someone came to spoke of me, they asked about the weather. Or perhaps wanted to play cards. Feels like it's 'demons this' and 'beast in the woods' that. Not that these are not important topics, but I wonder if this is how it is going to be for the foreseable future. I'd rather hope not, but, this appears to be a task that I am expertly suited for.

What a job. Perhaps next time I see Aislin, I will ask her about her griffon. That would brighten my day, I think.

Written By Mason

Dec. 22, 2016, 12:25 p.m.(6/15/1005 AR)

I consider myself something of a blessed man. I think I have been smacked down by the gods as many times as I've been lifted up, so I like to think myself somewhat lucky. Or at the least, blessed.

But now that I've been able to collect my thoughts, I now consider the idea that I have now seen real, true evil twice in my life. Once was unwillingly, the other more recent was done knowing exactly what was involved.

I have seen evil before, and I now know that it's face takes many different shapes and forms. Twisted, and it corrupts everything around it. Nature, animals, people. The most disturbing part about it is the simple fact that it does not bother me as much as I had thought. It still bothers me, but after Pyre, I realize that I am simply...used to it. I have come to know what to expect. And the horror that others see, it's like a veil being pulled from their eyes. And they finally see, in that first moment, realize what I have been carrying for so long. Maybe understand why I tried so hard to warn them about. I had no desire for them to see what I already have. But I think at this point, where we are, that's wishful thinking.

Demons are not allegorical. They are real. Very real.

Written By Mason

Dec. 18, 2016, 9:45 p.m.(6/4/1005 AR)

I feel like I'm going mad. The more I think upon, the more I ruminate on it and the more I hear, the more frustrated I become.

Who are you. Why did you do what you did? What made me exempt? Why did I live and the others die?

What makes me so damn worth it? What did I do? Why I do live and countless others lie dead?

Answer me, damnit. I deserve an answer. For everything. Just tell me, answer one blasted question.

Why.

Written By Mason

Dec. 18, 2016, 2:34 p.m.(6/3/1005 AR)

I need more information. What I have is not enough. I feel like I'm walking around with only parts and pieces. Enough to have a clear idea of where to do, but I have little desire to be stumbling around in the dark.

Knowledge of Eurus can only take me so far, and I find it more than curious that there are so many parallels between Arvum and Eurus on a great many things. Things that have been relevant to my research. It's frustrating that I have to skulk about and scrape for every shred, relevant or not. But at the moment, I can't discount anything.

And while it's been invaluable to my research and study, there is a certain knack that there's more to know, and so much more that's been lost, for one reason or another. Even if the fact of how it's been lost has been topic. To myself, specifically. Have I seen things others have not and simply taken it for granted that everyone else did? I have no basis for comparison.

For now, I will continue to do what I have been doing, but constantly, I feel like I'm two steps behind others. It's all I can do. If my Uncle could see me now. I'm sure he'd be chewing on his turban in rage.

Written By Mason

Dec. 15, 2016, 4:08 p.m.(5/22/1005 AR)

Relationship Note on Eirene

She beat me down, but at least I didn't do too poorly?

I like her. Says what she thinks and stands by it. Arx could do with more with people like her.

Though I think she needs to give herself a bit more credit with things. Still, be more than happy to do that again. Even if I lose. Repeatedly.

Written By Mason

Dec. 15, 2016, 1:10 p.m.(5/22/1005 AR)

So often I find myself writing more and more. And my thoughts often return to home. There are times where I do not miss the politics of Eurus, the mentality, and I really do prefer the people in Arvum compared that to my own. Their nobility has a certain less...ruthlessness about them. I don't feel like I'm walking on glass as much as I did when I was in Ahj'on.

That being said, I still miss the desert. I miss the food. I miss the sights that I do not see in Arvum. I miss hearing the prayers to Ahj'on sing out from the temple.

And through the days, my thoughts go the songs of my people, songs passed down through the ages, back to days after we escaped our chains. There was one in particular that I shared during my expedition through the desert. I write it down here so that in my old age the words do not leave me.

Deep in the ocean, dead and cast away
Where innocence is burned in flames
A million mile from home, I'm walking ahead
I'm frozen to the bones, I am...

A soldier on my own, I don't know the way
I'm riding up the heights of shame
I'm waiting for the call, the hand on the chest
I'm ready for the fight and fate

The sound of iron clash is stuck in my head,
The thunder of the drums dictates
The rhythm of the falls the number of deaths
The rising of the heights ahead

From the dawn of time to the end of days
I will have to run away
I want to feel the pain and the bitter taste
Of the blood on my lips again

The steady burst of sand is burning my hands,
I'm frozen to the bones, I am
A million mile from home, I'm walking away
I can't remind your eyes, your face


Ironic how given the days stretch on how they do, I find the song more relevant as the days pass.

Written By Mason

Dec. 14, 2016, 7:55 p.m.(5/20/1005 AR)

I know who you are and I know what you're doing. And who you serve will leave you a dried-out husk, in the end.

Written By Mason

Dec. 11, 2016, 10:12 p.m.(5/11/1005 AR)

It appears my reputation for a knowledge of things beyond curry is starting to spread.

I'm unsure if this is a good or bad thing. I wonder if this is what holy and mighty Ahj'on had planned for me. In his restful wisdom, I am guided by his hand.

Written By Mason

Dec. 11, 2016, 3:11 p.m.(5/10/1005 AR)

I have come to the conclusion that perhaps Arvum is not yet ready for the cuisine that comes from Eurus. Can't help but consider the idea that it simply causes too much discord within the population.

I had thought that curry would've been innocuous enough. If Lou eats it the way she prefers it, then I had thought that perhaps the rest of population could be to do so as well. I was very wrong on this.

Comments about nipples, curry being tossed about, a duchess almost blinded and an impromptu wrestling match. I've seen any of this brought about by curry.

I do feel slightly bad about this, was not my intention, even if I'm now considering the military application of it.

Though, it might be best if my people never find out about it. If they knew that Arvum had this kind of reaction to curry... No. They must never know.

Written By Mason

Dec. 10, 2016, 6:18 p.m.(5/8/1005 AR)

Relationship Note on Aislin

She is likely one of my most cherished of friends since I have made my way here to Arx. I consider myself blessed by Ahj'on himself to know such intrepid women like Lou and Aislin. I feel it is people like them that make this world for the better.

Her Eurusi is still terrible it really needs to be worked. Along with her reading of it. I'm not sure how much I'll be able to stand the fact that she sounds more like an injured camel than anything else. Yet, I say that with affection.

I am glad to know her and help her in her journeys.

Written By Mason

Dec. 10, 2016, 3:08 p.m.(5/7/1005 AR)

إذا كان أي شخص يمكن قراءة هذا، وسوف يكون أعجب أعلى درجة.

وإذا كنت تستطيع قراءة هذا، ووقف شراء، سأشتري لك
والشراب.

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